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by **LOLtron** » Fri Nov 02, 2012 9:16 am

The series will focus on Spider-Man's brief sidekick.

Source: Comics Beat

Marvel has announced an Alpha miniseries, focusing on the Spider-Man sidekick created by Dan Slott. The series, written by Josh Fialkov with art by Nuno Plati, will focus on how the character adapts to living in Pittsburgh.

To be blunt, I don't know what the hell Marvel is smoking to think that Alpha has any legs whatsoever in the market. His storyline reminded friends that today's teenagers are repellent, amoral scuzbags that deserve to be publicly shamed and castrated before they became a burden on society and his character was almost universally derided as "the worst thing since Ke$ha." I don't see how moving Alpha to Pittsburgh and giving him ties to ~~Miguel O'Hara~~ the new Spider-Man will make him any better.

At least Alpha will fit in nicely with the residents of Pittsburgh, long considered to be some of the most socially repugnant inhabitants of North America. I imagine that Alpha will stay busy due to the city's high crime rate and get dating advice from alleged rapist Ben Roethlisberger. He might even head to the Andy Warhol and marvel at some of the canvases the artist urinated on.

The first issue hits stores in February. Be sure to avoid Zechs the week it comes out.

Written or Contributed by ThanosCopter

READ THIS ARTICLE ON THE FRONT PAGE, HUMANS!

by **Victorian Squid** » Fri Nov 02, 2012 9:24 am

by **Lord Ice** » Fri Nov 02, 2012 10:33 am

Well, he's a blonde underage twink. All he needs to do is get picked up by a gay ad exec and he's got it made. :wink:

/qaf'd

by **S.F. Jude Terror** » Fri Nov 02, 2012 11:20 am

Man, I'll bet we'd be getting a shitload of hate mail if people from Pittsburg could read and write.

by **Zechs** » Fri Nov 02, 2012 11:51 am

ThanosCopter wrote: The first issue hits stores in February. Be sure to avoid Zechs the week it comes out.

WHAT?! I didn't even bad mouth Alpha. I kind of liked the concept.

by **chap22** » Fri Nov 02, 2012 12:01 pm

And across the land, zero fucks were given!

by **draco x** » Fri Nov 02, 2012 12:07 pm

Does the Jackal or Roderick Kingsley show up to kill him by the last issue of the mini-series? If so that would be the only thing that would make me touch this book. Otherwise, I have zero to no interest in this character or him going to Pittsburgh.

by **draco x** » Fri Nov 02, 2012 12:08 pm

chap22 wrote:And across the land, zero fucks were given!

Post of the day here. :-D

by **rdrsfn82** » Fri Nov 02, 2012 12:20 pm

This sounds horrible except the part that says it's written by Josh Fialkov. He's really good and one of the few people that could possibly make this a decent book.