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COMMENTARY: The Fuck!? Hellblazer Ending With Issue 300

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LOLtron

Rain Partier

Postby LOLtron » Thu Nov 08, 2012 9:14 am

COMMENTARY: The Fuck!? Hellblazer Ending With Issue 300

Fuck you DC, fuck you in the fucking arse!!



Source: As long-running Vertigo title 'Hellblazer' ends run in 2013, John Constantine not fading away

Hellblazer, the longest running Vertigo book of all time, will end in February 2013 with issue 300, and with it ends the last non-creator owned book being put out by the “Big Two” that actually gave a crap about quality stories, continuity, character development, and treating its readers with any semblance of respect.

Begun in 1988 as a spinoff of Alan Moore’s Swamp Thing, Hellblazer follows the adventures of anti-hero John Constantine as he uses his considerable magical skills to fight crime, defeat demons, get laid, cure cancer, and be awesome.  With almost 300 issues in the can (all of which this writer owns in single issue format), Hellblazer has had very few issues, let alone arcs or runs,  that would be considered bad by people with any taste, so of course DC decides it’s time for the book to go.

“They” say that Hellblazer is ending so that a new book, Constantine, can start “focusing on the detective's adventures in the re-launched DC universe.” Fuck that.  Basically, this means that DC thinks its readers are too stupid to know the difference between the Vertigo book and Jeff Lemire's Justice League Dark in the Nu52.

The new, non Vertigo, no cussing, no boobs, no sex, no fun, writer of Constantine, Robert Venditti (best selling author of The Homeland Directive) stated:

"He's going to be the same age that he is in Justice League Dark and the same character that people know and recognize _ the drinking and smoking, the con man aspect of him _ that's going to be very much part of the series,"

Fuck that!

Venditti went on and spewed some nonsense about how he equated the challenge of writing Constantine to the success he had reviving Valiant Entertainment's X-O Manowar, because it’s the same thing to bring a book back after 10 years and re-launch a book so that idiots won’t be confused.

I’m not normally one to get upset by crap like this, I mean, its DC – the same people who decided that bringing back Barry, the guy who died to save an entire universe, was a better alternative than keeping around the only former side-kick to have made good life choices as an adult, Wally West – so I don’t really expect all that much from their higher-ups, but I had hoped against hope that after 300 issues, Hellblazer was safe from their ineptitude.

Guess I was wrong.

Fucking shit whores!

 



Written or Contributed by GHERU


READ THIS ARTICLE ON THE FRONT PAGE, HUMANS!
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GHERU

Rain Partier

Postby GHERU » Thu Nov 08, 2012 9:18 am

:smt013
User avatar

Chesscub

WTF is this rank?

Postby Chesscub » Thu Nov 08, 2012 9:28 am

If you haven't read X-O Manowar, you're missing out.
User avatar

GHERU

Rain Partier

Postby GHERU » Thu Nov 08, 2012 9:29 am

Chesscub wrote:If you haven't read X-O Manowar, you're missing out.

its on my trade list
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Zechs

Outhouse Editor

Postby Zechs » Thu Nov 08, 2012 9:39 am

I dunno. No cussing or sex but the violence will continue? I think this is DC just trying to put a "PG-13" label on the book so it can garner more readers.
User avatar

GHERU

Rain Partier

Postby GHERU » Thu Nov 08, 2012 9:44 am

then start a new book set in the DCU
no need to cancel Hellblazer, unless you think your readers are stupid
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Zechs

Outhouse Editor

Postby Zechs » Thu Nov 08, 2012 9:50 am

GHERU wrote:then start a new book set in the DCU
no need to cancel Hellblazer, unless you think your readers are stupid


Yes DC thinks readers are stupid. Because having Wally West, Cassandra Cain, and Donna Troy out there would confuse readers. :P
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habitual

Silly French Man

Postby habitual » Thu Nov 08, 2012 10:42 am

This is a terrible idea.

Hab
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Lord Ice

Motherfucker from Hell

Postby Lord Ice » Thu Nov 08, 2012 10:42 am

Zechs wrote:I dunno. No cussing or sex but the violence will continue? I think this is DC just trying to put a "PG-13" label on the book so it can garner more readers.


Then they better put a Batsuit on him if they want the book to sell. :wink:
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chap22

Rain Partier

Postby chap22 » Thu Nov 08, 2012 11:20 am

clearly, this does not bode well for Vertigo.
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GHERU

Rain Partier

Postby GHERU » Thu Nov 08, 2012 11:33 am

chap22 wrote:clearly, this does not bode well for Vertigo.

indeed
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IvCNuB4

Staff Writer

Postby IvCNuB4 » Thu Nov 08, 2012 11:35 am

no boobs, no sex


Fan-boys. Still afraid to watch cable TV where they might see real people engaging in adult activities :lol:
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S.F. Jude Terror

OMCTO

Postby S.F. Jude Terror » Thu Nov 08, 2012 11:35 am

We shouldn't know this.
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Punchy

Staff Writer

Postby Punchy » Thu Nov 08, 2012 11:40 am

Cheeky Cunts.
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Punchy

Staff Writer

Postby Punchy » Thu Nov 08, 2012 11:41 am

Is this new series going to be set in the UK or the US?

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