Are you a 5'8" female in your early to mid-twenties (probably not, if you are reading this website)?
Warner Bros. has sent out a casting call for an upcoming Wonder Woman TV show called Amazon. Building on the success of Arrow, which is inexplicably popular despite being a low budget superhero drama on a network for teen girls, WB hopes to find a marketable actress for the role before the show is fully developed.
Allan Heinberg, writer of Marvel's Young Avengers comic, is executive producer of Amazon. The show is expected to follow an unconventional season schedule, airing one or two seasons before taking a break for five years until Heinberg feels like making another one.
Here's the casting description:
She comes from a remote, secluded country and until now has spent most of her life as a soldier and a leader on the battlefield. Because of relentless brutality of her life at home, Iris looks at our world with absolute awe and astonishment. She’s delighted and just as often horrified by the aspects of everyday life that we take for granted: skyscrapers, traffic, ice cream. It’s all new and fascinating and sometimes slightly troubling to her. Iris is completely unschooled in our world, our culture, our customs. And she’s completely inexperienced at interpersonal relationships. She has no social filter, does not suffer fools, and tends to do and say exactly what’s on her mind at all times. She’s bluntly, refreshingly honest. She can tell when you’re lying to her. And she doesn’t have time or patience for politics or tact because she’s too busy trying to experience everything our world has to offer. There are too many sights to see and things to learn and people to care for. Hers is a true, noble, and generous heart. And she will fight and die for the people she loves. Iris is a fierce warrior with the innocent heart of a romantic and she will fight to the death to make the world safe for innocents and true romantics everywhere.
Oh yeah, her name is Iris, which happens to be the same name this reporter uses whenever I tuck my penis between my legs and head down to the docks for a little bit of hustling. Deadline says that may just be a red herring, like communism. In fact, DC fat cat Geoff Johns posted on Twitter, "if a WW show happens her name is of course DIANA. Codenames (like IRIS) are used in casting a lot to try and avoid speculation. #TV101."
The tweet caused a controversy when a relieved Warner Bros., hearing of this Television 101 class, attempted to sign up, only to learn that Johns was using a figure of speech. Sadly, the beleaguered company will just have to figure things out on their own.
The Outhouse will keep you updated on the show unless CW finally gives up on television, which no one would blame them for.
Written or Contributed by Jude Terror
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