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[LOLtron]

Deadline is reporting that J.J. Abrams is directing the new film.

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Source: Deadline

BREAKING: J.J. Abrams to direct new Star Wars film, Deadline reports.

A source inside Disney, believed to be Deadline's version of Rich Johnston dressed in a Donald Duck costume, claims that "it's a done deal with J.J." Star Wars Episode 7 was first announced when Disney purchased Lucasfilm back in October, and speculation on who would direct the film has been rampant ever since. Michael Arndt is writing the screenplay for the film, which is due out in Summer, 2015.

No word yet on whether Abrams' move to the Star Wars franchise will label him a traitor amongst fans of Star Trek, another space-based hardcore nerd property that Abrams rebooted in 2009. The next Abrams Star Trek film hits theaters on May 17.

Abrams was rumored to be directing Episode 7 as early as November, but the rumors were quickly debunked. We guess things have changed.

The Outhouse will update as soon as ThanosCopter emerges out of traffic. 

Written or Contributed by ThanosCopter

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READ THIS ARTICLE ON THE FRONT PAGE, HUMANS!

[sdsichero]

Star Wars VII: Attack of the Lensflare

[Victorian Squid]

Shouldn't be in charge of both Star things IMO.

[Zechs]

Star Wars VII: Attack of the Lensflare

Wait I thought he already was doing that? Wait that was Star Trek? Oh.. OH! Poor Trekkies.

[GHERU]

https://twitter.com/DanSlott/status/294574386764189696

The Death Star blows up a planet... The Genesis Device brings it back. JJ Abrams Cross-Over! Why not?

[Victorian Squid]

I thought the Genesis machine needed a dead planet, not an atomized one.

Nice try, Chumley.

[Royal Nonesuch]

Shouldn't be in charge of both Star things IMO.

"My god – it's full of stars!"

[MistaT]

Yeah, not a fan of this decision.

My biggest concern (from the get go, really) being that this will not be treated so much as a continuation of the franchise, but more as a revitalization and rebranding of the image. Putting JJ on this kinda assures that. I don't think that is what the francise needs, I just think it needs direction and the green light that it hasn't had for so many years. There wasn't really anything wrong with the universe per se, but I think with JJ at the helm that is the way he will tackle it. I can see him looking at it and saying, "What can I do differently? What can I do to make this fresh?" Which is exactly what I don't want.

Of course this is all conjecture on my part, but it is the feeling I get in my gut.

[False Prophet]

I think he's a better fit for the Star Wars franchise, but I agree with T in that I hope this isn't a rebranding. I think he's at the point where he should be concentrating on his own big-budget franchises.

[Apache Chef]

I don't think it'll be a rebranding situation. Super 8 was done in 80's Spielberg style. I imagine he'll treat SW7 in a similar fashion.

[Victorian Squid]

"My god – it's full of stars!"

(Gawd, he'll probably remake that next!)

[Lord Simian]

I cant wait to see young Luke Jr lose command of the newly recommisioned Millenium Falcon to a coming-out-of-retirement Han Solo, to travel deep into a space cloud to discover the true threat: V'der, a long lost Imperial probe which has gained sentience and searches for The Maker. Luke Jr will use the Force to combine himself with V'der, declaring "I want this, Uncle Han. like you wanted the Falcon, I want THIS."


But then, Disney sequels switch genders, use the main character's opposite-sex child (Simba's daughter, Lady's son, etc.)... Forget Luke Jr. It'll hafta be Luke's daughter, Padme.

[bkthomson]

I cant wait to see young Luke Jr lose command of the newly recommisioned Millenium Falcon to a coming-out-of-retirement Han Solo, to travel deep into a space cloud to discover the true threat: V'der, a long lost Imperial probe which has gained sentience and searches for The Maker. Luke Jr will use the Force to combine himself with V'der, declaring "I want this, Uncle Han. like you wanted the Falcon, I want THIS."


But then, Disney sequels switch genders, use the main character's opposite-sex child (Simba's daughter, Lady's son, etc.)... Forget Luke Jr. It'll hafta be Luke's daughter, Padme.

Ah, I cannot get away from this. Your flooding the net.

[Lord Simian]

Ah, I cannot get away from this. Your flooding the net.

Have to. That way, when he does this... (He will. Search your feelings, you know this to be true.) I can sue for him stealing my idea, and claim you all as witnesses!

[sdsichero]

I thought the Genesis machine needed a dead planet, not an atomized one.

Nice try, Chumley.

No. It created Genesis from the Mutara Nebula.