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[LOLtron]

Though he hasn't been offered the job, the actor has expressed availability and willingness to portray any number of potentially film-ruining roles in the new Star Wars movies.

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Source: ThanosCopter Newswire

Rumors hit the net today that Harrison Ford is unofficially officially signed on to reprise the role of Han Solo in the upcoming Star Wars films from Disney, but what about Shia LaBeouf, who famously ruined the Indiana Jones franchise by portraying Ford's son, Mutt Williams, in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull? According to our sources, while no one at Disney has considered offering LaBeouf a role, the actor would be perfectly willing to take one if the opportunity came up.

"I could play Han Solo's son. That's the obvious way to go, and probably what most people are clamoring for," LaBeouf told reliable sources in statements leaked on the internets this morning. "But I'm open to other possibilities as well. For instance, I could play a descendant of Jar Jar Binks. I've been practicing my Jar Jar."

"Meesa think, for an old man, you ain't so berry berry bad in a fight!" mimicked LaBeouf, clearly quite proud of himself. "Pretty great, right? I can do an Ewok too. I could play all the Ewoks."

When asked why he's even talking about this when no one has brought up his name in any capacity related to the franchise, LaBeouf was undeterred. "Why wouldn't they want me? Everyone saw what I did with Indiana Jones. With Harry - that's what I call my friend and real life surrogate father figure, Harrison Ford - signing on to reprise his role, I think it's only natural that Disney is gonna want to bring back some of that Crystal Skull magic. Get the band back together, you know?"

LaBeouf's enthusiasm is appreciated, but what about his recent vow to stop making big budget Hollywood movies and only participate in small-time, independent filmmaking?

"Oh, I'm still into that," LaBeouf assured fans worried about the state of his artistic integrity. "For instance, I'm currently working on writing and directing a subtitled French language film, an autobiographical piece, called LaBeouf: A LaLife. I thought about it though, and, it's really not right to deprive the mainstream movie going audiences of my talent, so I'm going to do Star Wars too."

"After they ask me, of course," he added, confidently. "Which they will soon. Hey my phone is ringing! That's probably them."

"It was a wrong number," he said few moments later, slightly downtrodden. "But Disney will call soon."

Immediately after LaBeouf's statements hit the web, ComicBooks.net's Gus Sterlingham published an article speculating on whether or not Joseph Gordon Levitt would play Shia LaBeouf in LaBeouf: A LaLife.

Star Wars Episode 7 will be in theaters in June 2015, leaving the online geek media more than two years to make up more completely unfounded rumors about it in an attempt to score sweet unique hits.

Written or Contributed by Jude Terror

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[covalesky]

Don't even joke about it!

[Black_Orchid]

[Grayson]

[fieldy snuts]

I think he'd be perfect for a modern Han Solo

[BBally]

I'm one of those who doesn't hate Shia LeBeouf, like most actors he has his strong points and weak points, his strongest being in comedy or light dramas, and I thought he was good in Hole and The Greatest Game Ever Played.

[Rockman]

I don't mind LeBUff but I don't want him in a Star Wars movie.

BTW Jude that LaLife thing was hilarious

[S.F. Jude Terror]

I don't mind LeBUff but I don't want him in a Star Wars movie.

BTW Jude that LaLife thing was hilarious

[HNutz]

He's gotten to play Indiana Jones's son, hang out with Optimus Prime... who EXACTLY did he sell his soul to so that he could live out every kid's dream?

And when are his 10 years up?

[covalesky]

He's gotten to play Indiana Jones's son, hang out with Optimus Prime... who EXACTLY did he sell his soul to so that he could live out every kid's dream?

And when are his 10 years up?

And hang out with Constantite