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Drew Magary takes on children's television.

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Juan Cena


Postby Juan Cena » Mon Feb 18, 2013 5:12 pm

Drew Magary takes a look at modern children's television. Specifically, Max & Ruby.

Max and Ruby are both child bunnies living in a house together. Ruby is the big sister. Max is the little brother. It appears that they live alone and that their parents are dead, presumably run over by a Chevy Silverado, or perhaps sold for meat by this woman:

As a result of their parents' mysterious absence (creator Rosemary Wells says that the parents are alive but never seen, which strikes me a flimsy attempt of a coverup. ROSEMARY WELLS IS HIDING SOMETHING FROM US), Ruby is forced to take on more maternal responsibilities than a bunny of her age would normally have to shoulder. She must feed Max. She must clothe Max. She must constantly pick up after Max because Max leaves his goddamn toys all over the place.

As a result of this added burden, Ruby is a coarsened young woman. Her frustration with Max's bullshit manifests itself in EXTREME BITCHINESS. She micromanages poor Max nearly to death. Max is never allowed to do anything on his own. And his passion for toys and candy is frowned upon by this ... this withered soul of a sister bunny. As a result of her constant haranguing, poor Max can speak in only Tourette's-like, single-word bursts. "LOBSTER!" "SUPERBUNNY!" "FUCKROLL!" Stuff like that.

Also, Ruby has a distinct lisp. If you're forced to watch Max & Ruby enough, the lisp becomes a nail slowly getting driven into your head. Why is she lisping? Does actress Samantha Morton, the voice of Ruby, have a similar lisp? What would happen if Ruby and Mike Mayock announced an NFL game together?

Rest of article:
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Outhouse Editor

Postby GLX » Mon Feb 18, 2013 5:15 pm

I await the day Drew Magary disses Matt Ryan and/or praises Randy Orton as the best wrestler of all time. :P
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Juan Cena


Postby Juan Cena » Mon Feb 18, 2013 5:18 pm

GLX wrote:I await the day Drew Magary disses Matt Ryan and/or praises Randy Orton as the best wrestler of all time. :P

I think he's done a lot of Matt Ryan bashing over at Kissing Suzie Kolber. Or at least one of that crew has. (It's him or Christmas Ape, I'm really not in the mood to check on which one it was)
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S.F. Jude Terror


Postby S.F. Jude Terror » Mon Feb 18, 2013 5:19 pm

This article amused me.
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Lord Simian

The Lord of the Monkeys

Postby Lord Simian » Mon Feb 18, 2013 11:33 pm

S.F. Jude Terror wrote:This article amused me.


You and Nac, you're likethis.

Perhaps, someday, Magary will amuse THREE people. Aim High, Drewster!
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<( ' . ' )>

Postby Keb » Mon Feb 18, 2013 11:44 pm

The sad thing is that the writing on Max and Ruby is more complex and educational than Drew Magary's own work.

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