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An exclusive mystery teaser for a new Power Rangers comic was exposed by an over-eager fan.
Source: MTV Geek
Earlier today, MTV Geek coyly posted a teaser with the caption "we're not backing down" featuring a dimly lit hand gripping a mechanical red ball. MTV claimed to not know what the teaser was for, as if any old image that winds up in their inbox gets automatically published with MTV exclusive watermarks. The website's plans to build interest were shattered within moments, however, when super-nerd Dave Llamas, a 37 year old Power Rangers aficionado from Little Rock, AK.
"How can you have the word 'geek' in your title and not recognize the fucking Power Rangers?!" screamed an irate Llamas as he swept Power Rangers memorabilia off shelves in his room and onto the floor. "I mean, that's obviously the fucking red Power Ranger's morpher!"
"Idiots!" he added, kicking a box of unopened Power Rangers action figures from 1996. The box skidded across the carpet, receiving a small dent to one of the corners and lowering its resale value by 15%.
Within moments, Llamas had taken to eight different social media accounts to decry MTV's failure to recognize the teaser, proclaiming loudly that it was obvious that the drawn image, along with the fact that the rights to the Power Rangers had recently returned to Saban Entertainment, made it highly likely that the company had signed some kind of licensing deal with a comics publisher like BOOM! or IDW. Llamas' one nerd campaign to expose the teaser wreaked havoc on MTV Geek's publishing schedule, as the website had planned to run several teasers throughout the week before revealing the comic, thus reaping countless unique hits, the currency of the internet.
"What the hell, man?" commented Downtown Julie Brown, a former MTV VJ who we assume is the head of MTV Geek because who cares, really. "What's that guy's problem?"
"The problem," explained geek psychologist Dr. Thaddeus Puffinbottoms, "is the inescapable need for the geek to prove his alpha status by displaying more geek knowledge than his or her peers."
"Power Rangers is a special case because it's adapted from a Japanese property known as Super Sentai, which, as a side note, translates as 'Happy Fuck Party.'" Puffinbottoms explained. "So knowledge of this material spans across several geek genres, from television shows aimed at pre-teen boys to bizarre Japanese sexual perversions. It really runs the gamut."
"By showing that he knows more about the Power Rangers than anyone else, Llamas is establishing himself as the alpha geek. In most species, this would earn him mating opportunities with females in his pack, but these are geeks we're talking about, so really he'll just end up with a few extra Twitter followers or something."
"5 retweets!" shouted a proud Llamas upon checking his Twitter account. "Victory is mine!"
The Outhouse will let you know when MTV Geek reveals the Power Rangers comic, or when Bleeding Cool scoops them on it.
Written or Contributed by Jude Terror
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