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Review Group Week 198 - IMAGE UNITED #1

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Postby ****** » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:22 am

Overtkill is a Spawn villain (the big cyborg guy)
Mako is a Savage Dragon villain (the shark guy)

Those are the only two villians they fight, is it really that complicated? :P

Powerhouse (the chicken guy on the Mako page, also a SD villian) is also in a panel and has one line but he doesn't actually fight.

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Postby ****** » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:25 am

thefourthman wrote:and another question, everyone is doing their own stuff right? reason I ask is Dragon is much cleaner on the pages with everyone which is weird cause Youngblood still looks like shit and Dragon looks more like he does now when he is all solo. I know the Dragon stuff.


I think on the pages where there are McFarlane characters, he probably inked the whole page to expediate the process. At least I remember either him or Kirkman saying something to that effect on Word Balloon.

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Postby ****** » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:28 am

thefourthman wrote:Is Fortress supposed to remind me of Majestic?


Not that I know of, everything we know about him is in this issue. He seems to just be a dude who has somehow come into possession of this superpowered suit and now it's giving him visions of the future.
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Postby Victorian Squid » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:29 am

IMAGE UNITED #1

Didn't even look at comics in the '90s, but I've owned most of that Image stuff at one time or another and couldn't make it through most of it.

I always wonder--how did these people make so much filthy lucre for this stuff?! It was and is awful wanky crap--I STILL don't know who any of these characters are or what their powers are...they're always talking about their mysterious suits, or firing 6 guns at once but rarely hitting anything, or they have fake robot eyes strapped over their regular eyes...their costumes always look impractical, or downright painful in the case of Witchboobs or whatever her name is.

** Ok, someone help me out with this one panel--when the guy in the suit is fighting the shark-guy in tightpants, there is a thing in the lower-left corner of the panel that LOOKS like a small bale of straw with a beak on a muscleman body--WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING?!

Sorry, I had to get that out while I was looking at it here. The "jam" style--it even sounds like it's from the '90s--must be a lot more fun to do than read. What a waste of time and money sending this crap back-and-forth across the country when it looks like they could have done it in a half-hour if they were all in one place.

The clueless narration is like a parody of a clueless narration: How did I get here? Who am I again? Where did I get this hot dog? Is this the beginning...of my lunch break? The plotless plot plods along until Dark Spawn appears. It seems like a good ending point (please let it end) but then jarringly switches over to a very unpleasant-looking Savage Dragon page. I still can't look at it without cringing. Then back to the guy in the suit who says "We are all going to die!"

At that point, the comic is at an end, but there is no "to be continued" or "Next issue: They All Die!!" and since I already thought it ended when Dark Spawn said something vaguely menacing and final, I was a bit confused by the Haunt pages for a second. Is Haunt a member of the Image United soccer team too? I dunno. Nah, it's just some stuff I don't intend to read. The art in IU did make Haunt look good, tho.

The "Origins" page is about what you'd expect, and fails to answer the question of why the hell anyone liked any of this stuff in the first place, something I apparently will just never understand. Sure, it sounds great to have a company of creator-owned properties, but if they are all utter shit that looks like crap I doodled on my notebook in the 8th grade then so what?

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Postby thefourthman » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:29 am

amlah6 wrote:I think on the pages where there are McFarlane characters, he probably inked the whole page to expediate the process. At least I remember either him or Kirkman saying something to that effect on Word Balloon.

That makes sense. And is actually really cool, because he is an awesome inker then. He keeps the distinct style of the penciller intact while cleaning up the lines. I'm actually mega impressed by this then.

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Postby thefourthman » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:31 am

amlah6 wrote:Not that I know of, everything we know about him is in this issue. He seems to just be a dude who has somehow come into possession of this superpowered suit and now it's giving him visions of the future.

He reminds me a lot of Majestic, from suit design, to the whole outsider element of the the character. The prophecy angle seems like that fucker too. Who created Majestic and was he around before Jim Lee sold his soul to DC?

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Postby Victorian Squid » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:31 am

amlah6 wrote:Overtkill is a Spawn villain (the big cyborg guy)
Mako is a Savage Dragon villain (the shark guy)

Those are the only two villians they fight, is it really that complicated? :P

Powerhouse (the chicken guy on the Mako page, also a SD villian) is also in a panel and has one line but he doesn't actually fight.


Aha. Chicken guy named Powerhouse, eh? Are you sure you want to expose your vast knowledge of these characters?? :?

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Postby thefourthman » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:32 am

HOJ, I think that was the Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz!

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Postby ****** » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:33 am

House of J wrote:** Ok, someone help me out with this one panel--when the guy in the suit is fighting the shark-guy in tightpants, there is a thing in the lower-left corner of the panel that LOOKS like a small bale of straw with a beak on a muscleman body--WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING?!


Powerhouse. He's a Savage Dragon villain/superpowered chicken.

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Postby Victorian Squid » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:35 am

amlah6 wrote:Powerhouse. He's a Savage Dragon villain/superpowered chicken.



I saw your post after I posted my review. Why the hell was he even in that panel, I wonder? I don't recall seeing him sandwiched in anywhere else.

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Postby thefourthman » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:35 am

Powerhouse must be in the like 80 issues f Dragon I have not read, I should pick up the archives one day. Anyhow, Dragon is awesome. The rest of this shit, not so much.

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Postby Victorian Squid » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:36 am

thefourthman wrote:Powerhouse must be in the like 80 issues f Dragon I have not read, I should pick up the archives one day. Anyhow, Dragon is awesome. The rest of this shit, not so much.


Sorry, if it looks like the Battlegirl page my eyes can't take the pain.

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Postby thefourthman » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:37 am

House of J wrote:I saw your post after I posted my review. Why the hell was he even in that panel, I wonder? I don't recall seeing him sandwiched in anywhere else.

It's obviously something to do with the villains being outside their normal arenas. Everyone is fighting everyone else's baddies.

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Postby ****** » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:37 am

House of J wrote:[/b]

Aha. Chicken guy named Powerhouse, eh? Are you sure you want to expose your vast knowledge of these characters?? :?


I read something like the first 75-80 issues of Savage Dragon. It's a good comic. I've read a few issues over the past year and it's still pretty good, if I wasn't completely obsessive compulsive and felt the need to catch up on the 75 issues I missed, I'd probably start reading it again.

It's not like I'm answering Cyberforce questions, I don't know shit about those lame fucks. :P

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Postby ****** » Thu Nov 26, 2009 10:39 am

House of J wrote:I saw your post after I posted my review. Why the hell was he even in that panel, I wonder? I don't recall seeing him sandwiched in anywhere else.


Because super powered chickens are awesome?

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