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Eric Ratcliffe

Staff Writer

Postby Eric Ratcliffe » Sat Jan 09, 2010 5:55 pm

Punchy wrote:Simone is a terrible writer.

Argument fail.

And I think Bendis does differentiate his character's voices, Luke Cage, Spider-Man, Norman, Wolverine, Ares, all different.

Hell, his Ultimate Spider-Man isn't the same as his 616 Spider-Man.


And that right there is why you can't debate intelligently and why people like to fuck with you.

You don't like Simone. That's you. doesn't mean Gail's a bad writer. Just like Bryan doesn't like BMB's writing over all.

It's different opinions.
User avatar

prozacman

Expert Post Whore

Postby prozacman » Sat Jan 09, 2010 5:57 pm

Punchy wrote:I can't respect someone who likes Simone, I just can't.
:lol:
Man of the Atom, is that you?











:wink:
User avatar

Eric Ratcliffe

Staff Writer

Postby Eric Ratcliffe » Sat Jan 09, 2010 5:59 pm

Old Man wrote:Comic book -- a melding of words and art to tell a story.

Siege -- not a comic book.
____________________

Page 1: Best page in the book. Volstagg on a horse, with Asgard in the background. Only page of art worth mentioning in a positive way. Suitable for framing.

Page 2: Set in Chicago. Why is Volstagg in Chicago? How did he get there? Chicago is a long way from Oklahoma, which is where Asgard is located.

Page 3, panel 4: A Bendis character makes a fat person comment. Again. Why does Bendis hate?

Page 4: 4 characters new to the story appear, but are not introduced. Orange guy uses some kind of force ray that eminates from his hand to blow up some stuff. Pink guy uses some kind of electrical field that eminates from both hands to lift Volstagg from the street and into Soldier Field (on page 5).

Pages 5 and 6: Note that the dimensions of the field are not right. The field is only 70 yards long instead of 100. And the sideline is straight, not bowed out. See the image included below. Orange guy and pink guy team up their powers and blast Volstagg. This results in the entire stadium going up in one huge inferno. Note again that the dimensions are not right. The incinerated goalpost in the foreground is the same size as the goalpost in the background. Again, see the image. The artist appears to have used a Google Image as reference, yet still can't get the dimensions right.


Image


Pages 7-10: 4 pages of endless "characterization", otherwise known as endless prattling on that does nothing to advance the story.

Page 11: Ares, speaking to dozens of people. Zooming out, the camera shows he is speaking to perhaps 100,000 people. Who are these 100,000 people? Where are they housed? How do they get to Oklahoma? As to the speech, it's similar to Gerard Butler's "Tonight we dine in Hell!" speech, or perhaps Mel Gibson's "Today we earn the right to wear these frilly panties we have on under our kilts!" speech.

Pages 12-14: More endless prattling.

Page 15: Mary Sue shows up.

WE INTERRUPT THIS REVIEW FOR A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT!

THIS IS AMERICA! BUY AMERICAN CARS!

The preceding announcement brought to you in the middle of this review because of the placement of an ad for Honda which was placed in the middle of the story pages, the only advertisement inside this comic.

Page 16: Splash page showing numerous characters flying.

Page 17: Numerous characters flying, including Mary Sue. I know that Mary Sue is among those flying because there is a Rainbow Bright color scheme wherever she goes.

Page 18: "You're going to need a bigger stick." Oh, I laughed so hard at the 23,045th use of that old line from Jaws. Not. Cliched writing at its worse, which is what Bendis does best.

Pages 19 and 20: Here comes Thor to the rescue...OOPS!

Page 21: Mary Sue has intercepted Thor. Thor beats down Mary Sue with one blow from the Mighty Mjolnir. Osborn and his friendly neighborhood fiends arrive, including orange guy and pink guy, and all blast Thor at once.

Page 22: Thor takes it all in stride, then Osborn beats him down with one punch. Osborn is one bad dude, yo. All this has been filmed and televised.

Page 23: Cap fills his Depends. It's a bitch having explosive diarrhea.

And that's the story. Butwaittheresmore! 3 pages of Cup O' Joe, which might as well have been blank pages. 5 pages of 'Ares War Plan Transcript', which is even more poorly written than the story. And even a repeated section on one page. And the title of it should have been either (old style) Ares' War Plan Transcript or (new style) Ares's War Plan Transcript. 1 page Siege checklist, and 6 pages devoted to a preview of Hulk #19, the best storytelling in the book.

As you may be able to tell, I didn't care very much for this comic. Bendis can write better than this. Coipel can draw better than this. The story and the art do not mesh together to form a good comic book. Obviously, there are thousands of people who salivate each and every month when an Avengers comic comes out -- latest sales numbers show 75,000 buying Avengers comics every month. More power to them.

Bonus point for Thor smacking Mary Sue with his hammer brings this comic up to a 6. Otherwise, a waste of my time.


this is not a review this is someone spending way too much time picking something apart that they had obvious biased against in the first place. :wink:
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Punchy

Staff Writer

Postby Punchy » Sat Jan 09, 2010 6:07 pm

prozacman wrote:Man of the Atom, is that you?











:wink:


Her trolling of MoTA is one of the reasons she sucks.
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Eric Ratcliffe

Staff Writer

Postby Eric Ratcliffe » Sat Jan 09, 2010 6:16 pm

Saying Copiel's artwork is bad or not at his best here is insane. Even Lee liked it! So obviously old man is just trying to be controversial. :lol:
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Eric Ratcliffe

Staff Writer

Postby Eric Ratcliffe » Sat Jan 09, 2010 6:18 pm

Punchy wrote:Her trolling of MoTA is one of the reasons she sucks.


Someone's not comfortable with strong female writers. :wink:

Punchy is sexist!
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Punchy

Staff Writer

Postby Punchy » Sat Jan 09, 2010 6:21 pm

doombug wrote:Someone's not comfortable with strong female writers. :wink:

Punchy is sexist!


I'm not comfortable with trolls.
User avatar

Eric Ratcliffe

Staff Writer

Postby Eric Ratcliffe » Sat Jan 09, 2010 6:22 pm

Punchy wrote:I'm not comfortable with trolls.


gail's not a troll. at least not on the bendis board.
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Punchy

Staff Writer

Postby Punchy » Sat Jan 09, 2010 6:24 pm

doombug wrote:gail's not a troll. at least not on the bendis board.


She trolled MoTA.

She trolled me, and called me sexist, she has to bring up her gender all the time, as do her fans, even though it's irrelevant, she's just a poor writer.
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Old Man

cheese

Postby Old Man » Sat Jan 09, 2010 6:29 pm

doombug wrote:this is not a review this is someone spending way too much time picking something apart that they had obvious biased against in the first place. :wink:


But I included an image.

I have no problem with the overall premise, which is the opposite of my opinion of Civil War, but this is just not a good comic book.

I read the review by Douglas Wolk at Savage Critics after I wrote my review, and he appears to agree with me quite a bit about the poor quality of the writing and the failure of the art.
User avatar

Old Man

cheese

Postby Old Man » Sat Jan 09, 2010 6:31 pm

Punchy wrote:She trolled MoTA.

She trolled me, and called me sexist, she has to bring up her gender all the time, as do her fans, even though it's irrelevant, she's just a poor writer.


Aww, the poor widdle Punchy got put in his place by a woman. Aww.

Grow up.
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Punchy

Staff Writer

Postby Punchy » Sat Jan 09, 2010 6:34 pm

Old Man wrote:Aww, the poor widdle Punchy got put in his place by a woman. Aww.

Grow up.


Fuck off, you and your childish nitpicks, sorry, reviews need to grow up!

Simone is shit, but if you say it, you're sexist, you can't criticise her and her magic vagina.
User avatar

Old Man

cheese

Postby Old Man » Sat Jan 09, 2010 7:02 pm

Punchy wrote:Simone is shit, but if you say it, you're sexist, you can't criticise her and her magic vagina.


You really do have a problem with women, don't you?
User avatar

Punchy

Staff Writer

Postby Punchy » Sat Jan 09, 2010 7:16 pm

Old Man wrote:You really do have a problem with women, don't you?


Not at all, I have a problem with poor writers who can't take criticism and accuse anyone who dislikes their work of sexism.
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Kerny

Review Grouper

Postby Kerny » Sat Jan 09, 2010 7:19 pm

Old Man notices a lot of small things. He's old, but man :wink:

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