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Review Group Week 209 - CHOKER #1/TAILS OF THE PET AVENGERS

Discuss the latest comic book news and front page articles, read or post your own reviews of comics, and talk about anything comic book related. Threads from the two subforums below will also show up here. News Stand topics can also be read and posted in from The Asylum.

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Postby Victorian Squid » Fri Feb 12, 2010 5:06 pm

thefourthman wrote:But it is okay when a Nanny with a flying Umbrella does it?

Also, there are fans here like that too. I think the brits just want to seem cooler than they really are. What they fail to understand is that being yourself ALWAYS comes off as cooler than pretending and hiding.


Oh yeah. They all want their nannies to touch their fannies.

As to wanting to seem cooler, it's because we can't hear their cool British accents over the internet and it makes them feel inadequate.

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Postby Starlord » Sat Feb 13, 2010 12:22 am

Tales of the Pet Avengers #1

Though I spent most of my life resisting the whole concept of superhero animals (other than Krypto who deserves the Animal Hall of Fame status), Pet Avengers has become one of my favorite books in the last twelve months. The Frog of Thunder is by far my favorite character out of all of them, but there isn't a weak one in the bunch. This first issue are vignettes that show each animal in their own natural habitat.

Each one is entertaining, but unfortunately I don't think the Lockheed story really measures up to the others. On the flip side of that, the Redwing story is by far head and shoulders above the rest. A nice tale that actually humanizes The Falcon's less famous partner.

I can't say enough about this series. I'm glad they came out with a second one, and if you haven't had a chance to read the first one, please pick it up. The Pet Avengers chasing after the Infinity Gauntlet is a story that I think will some day become a real classic.

Story: 8
Art: 8.5
My Score: 8.25
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Postby Jubilee » Sat Feb 13, 2010 7:36 am

thefourthman wrote:Also, there are fans here like that too. I think the brits just want to seem cooler than they really are. What they fail to understand is that being yourself ALWAYS comes off as cooler than pretending and hiding.


Wrong. I hate this sort of bullshit. It's what you tell your kids before you introduce them to the real world. If I was a massive Star Trek fan and wore my outfit onto the streets, as opposed to being a massive Star Trek fan and didn't tell anyone, everyone would think the second me was cooler.

And I hate pets in comics, because although "adults in pyjamas beating up badguys" is weird. It could happen. I can accept genetic mutations. What I can't accept is a bunch on intelligent pets who talk and have fun and are ever so roflcute just because they do stuff which thier human counterparts do. It's like I know when I am buying X-men and Spider-man comics that the characters have powers. Everyone in the world knows this. I can accept that. If the X-men and Spider-mans greatest bad guy was "Hamneto" who happened to be exactly like human Magneto but... lmao he's a pig, it'd be fucking massively lame.

I don't read comics for "fun" or "escapism" I read them because like any other form of literature, I like a good story. People rip on the Star Wars films for having Ewoks and other gay ass shit, but these characters are just the same thing.

Hitman Monkey. How are people in thier 20's getting excited over a monkey who shoots guns. It's fucking stupid. It's like when people post pictures on the internet of the Star Wars cast in a band or ninjas v robots with the title "epic win" or "100% Awesome". No it's not, it's just the "random" brand of humour which I absolutely despise.

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Postby Jubilee » Sat Feb 13, 2010 8:17 am

I've read this comic now, and wow did I ever have a good time reviewing it!!!!

Tails of the Pet Avengers #1.

Let's start with the name of the book shall we! Tails of the Pet Avengers!. Tails, as in pets have tails, and we're going to be reading many tales ahead. It was at this point I realised this book wasn't for me.

First story is a tale of Frog Thor.. who is like Thor... only in Frog form, once I'd regained my composure, and started reading the comic again, was I in for a treat. It appears frog Thors clan of frogs, were under attack from a crocodile. What follwed was a three page fight scene with a crocodile. It was like a normal comic fight but with... animals. So to recap we get five pages of story, of which 60% are a fight between a character I couldn't care less about, and three crocodiles. Not a great start for the book. This is still probably my favorite story though.

Then comes a Zabu comic! Was I ever excited. Zabu has found a dead dinosaur, some other dinosaurs fight him, and then he takes the original dead dinosaurs home. "I wonder what Ka-zar will think" exclaims Zabu. "Perhaps things can change in the savage land". If the art wasn't great in this story, I would have forgotten it even quicker.

This is when the comic falls apart. Some dog that Aunt May has gets it's own five page comic, and Spidertour jizzes his pants, whilst I die a little bit more inside. The first panel has the dialogue "yip" making it the third story to use that phrase so far. Apparently Aunt May has taken her dog on a cruise. We are then treated to a verbal fight between a seagul and a dog. The seagull teases the dog for being a "lap warmer". Awesome stuff! Aunt Mays dog then discovers a plan by two chefs to poison everyone on the ship, and then rob the ships casino. A stupid enough plan to begin with, but then when Aunt Mays dog pretends to eat a bit of the food, and pretends to "play dead" one of the chef feels bad and admits to trying to poison the entire ship. It's this chefs character which appeals to me the most. I especially like the scene where he's picking up peoples plates and throwing them onto the floor yelling about him poisoning the food. A great plan from a great character is foiled again by Aunt Mays stupid dog.

Lockheeds story next! Lockheed fights the criminal "mad dog". Who as the scientist explains is a suprecriminal spliced with the genes of a "Mad dog" When Lockheed is around "I guess his primal instincts take over and he becomes well.. a MAD DOG" the comic tells us. Mad Dog is such an awesome character, and I was truly shocked when Lockheed defeated him. When Lockheed takes the stick of terrigen mists that Mad Dog stole back to the Inhumans, he's scolded and told "No I won't play fetch". At this point I set the comic down, a single tear rolled down my cheek, but somehow I forced myself to continue.

If you've got this far into the comic and want to read Lockheed turn up as some fat dragon girls date to prom. Then fair enough. Some girl is being bullied at school because she hates people and loves dragons. IMO I think she should be bullied, because that's fucking retarded. Anyway her teacher feels bad for her, and in the end Lockheed turns up with her to prom. So what? Am I supposed to care that some lame girl has now seen Lockheed. She's STILL GOT NO REAL LIFE FRIENDS AND WILL CONTINUE TO BE BULLIED. I hated these five pages.

The last story is about Falcons bird and some other pidgeon. There is some puns like "Fantastic Fowl" or "Alpha Flight" they stop a random robber, I guess Falcons Falcon now has a pidgeon sidekick.

The art in this was surprisingly decent.

2 out of 10
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Postby Old Man » Sat Feb 13, 2010 8:55 am

Jubilee wrote:I've read this comic now, and wow did I ever have a good time reviewing it!!!!

2 out of 10


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Postby thefourthman » Sat Feb 13, 2010 10:38 am

Jubilee wrote:Wrong. I hate this sort of bullshit. It's what you tell your kids before you introduce them to the real world. If I was a massive Star Trek fan and wore my outfit onto the streets, as opposed to being a massive Star Trek fan and didn't tell anyone, everyone would think the second me was cooler.

Depends on whether or not you deny being a Star Trek fan. That's a bad example though cause Star Trek is uberlame. ;) The point is that if you don't have a reason to bring it up and don't okay. If someone brings it up and you deny it, superuncool. If you go out of your way to avoid it, even worse. And if you make fun of it when people bring it up, you might as well slit your throat.

And I hate pets in comics, because although "adults in pyjamas beating up badguys" is weird. It could happen. I can accept genetic mutations. What I can't accept is a bunch on intelligent pets who talk and have fun and are ever so roflcute just because they do stuff which thier human counterparts do. It's like I know when I am buying X-men and Spider-man comics that the characters have powers. Everyone in the world knows this. I can accept that. If the X-men and Spider-mans greatest bad guy was "Hamneto" who happened to be exactly like human Magneto but... lmao he's a pig, it'd be fucking massively lame.

so what's your opinion of WE3? and tread lightly, you don't want to be a hypocrite.

I don't read comics for "fun" or "escapism" I read them because like any other form of literature, I like a good story. People rip on the Star Wars films for having Ewoks and other gay ass shit, but these characters are just the same thing.
You are a big fan of superhero comics, you don't get to pull the literature card. I am not saying that superhero comics can't tell good stories, but for the most part capes and tights comics are the reality television of comics... it is the prevailing genre and there is much more subpar to awful stuff then there is quality stuff. For every Watchmen, there are thirty or forty {insert whatever superhero comics you hate here}

Hitman Monkey. How are people in thier 20's getting excited over a monkey who shoots guns. It's fucking stupid. It's like when people post pictures on the internet of the Star Wars cast in a band or ninjas v robots with the title "epic win" or "100% Awesome". No it's not, it's just the "random" brand of humour which I absolutely despise.

Hit Monkey has as much to do with Deadpool and his insane popularity than any other factor. Let people be fans how they want to be and express themselves however they want, at least those folks are brave enough to let their freak flag fly and be themselves. It is the sanctimonious self hating comics fans that I can't stand. the ones who hate all the comics they read and are afraid to read one in public due to ridicule. I'd take a furry cosplayer over one of them any day.

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Postby Jubilee » Sat Feb 13, 2010 10:45 am

WE3 established right from the start it was about talking animals. Same with Fables, you knew from right away with that Pig that you're being asked to accept something like that. It works. It makes sense. It's when a comic company like Marvel make Spider-ham or Pet Avengers it get's fucking stupid. It's taking one property, and turning them into animals. It fucking sucks. Same reason Marvel Apes sucked.

There's a massive difference, and I've said it before.

And you go on about people hating comics, then say that for every good comic book, there are 30 to 40 awful ones in the superhero medium! That's hypocrisy. I don't mind reading something like Maus in public, it's something like Pet Avengers which is embaressing.

I'd much rather take someone whose self concious enough to know that reading comics in public is fucking lame, then a furry cosplayer. I'm bored of all the "just be who you wanna be and don't care what other people think of you" bullshit. That's fine and dandy if you have lots of friends, but if you are a Star Trek furry, odds are you aren't.
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Postby thefourthman » Sat Feb 13, 2010 10:53 am

Jubilee wrote:WE3 established right from the start it was about talking animals. Same with Fables, you knew from right away with that Pig that you're being asked to accept something like that. It works. It makes sense. It's when a comic company like Marvel make Spider-ham or Pet Avengers it get's fucking stupid. It's taking one property, and turning them into animals. It fucking sucks. Same reason Marvel Apes sucked.

There's a massive difference, and I've said it before.

And you go on about people hating comics, then say that for every good comic book, there are 30 to 40 awful ones in the superhero medium! That's hypocrisy. I don't mind reading something like Maus in public, it's something like Pet Avengers which is embaressing.

I'd much rather take someone whose self concious enough to know that reading comics in public is fucking lame, then a furry cosplayer. I'm bored of all the "just be who you wanna be and don't care what other people think of you" bullshit. That's fine and dandy if you have lots of friends, but if you are a Star Trek furry, odds are you aren't.

I see no difference between We3 and Fables and Pet Avengers and Spider-Ham except your preconceptions of the properties. You choose to like what you like. Spider-ham is way cooler than WE3 in my opinion. If WE3 had been a comic with people in it, no one would remember it, but because it is talking animals it is cool. And your argument was that talking animals were stupid, now you shift your argument. I didn't even know they had the Republican party in England.:P

And as for the embarrassment over your hobby thing. Ever think that your secret self loathing towards yourself because you see yourself as unlikeable because of your hobby might actually make you um, well, unlikeable. I've gotten people that would have never thought about reading a comic to become avid fans because I am open and honest about them and better yet passionate.... you end up with folks going "what's he so fired up about"

And no, having a different set of standards for which books are acceptable in public is hypocrisy not only that, I am not even narcassistic enough to think that only the books I like are worthy of the public's view and others aren't. The only thing that would be more hypocritical is say Hitler actually being a black jew.

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Postby Starlord » Sat Feb 13, 2010 11:07 am

Oh for pete's sake, Cupcake. Did you even have a childhood? Perhaps if the Pet Avengers were decapitating their villains and shooting one line gags at each other you may have liked it better.

What is it with you and fun books. Must the comic book world always be dark and dank for you to think it's a good comic?
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Postby Jubilee » Sat Feb 13, 2010 11:57 am

starlord wrote:
What is it with you and fun books. Must the comic book world always be dark and dank for you to think it's a good comic?


No but they have to be a hell of a lot better and funnier than most "fun" comics on the stand today.

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Postby Jubilee » Sat Feb 13, 2010 12:00 pm

thefourthman wrote:I see no difference between We3 and Fables and Pet Avengers and Spider-Ham except your preconceptions of the properties. You choose to like what you like. Spider-ham is way cooler than WE3 in my opinion. If WE3 had been a comic with people in it, no one would remember it, but because it is talking animals it is cool. And your argument was that talking animals were stupid, now you shift your argument. I didn't even know they had the Republican party in England.:P

And as for the embarrassment over your hobby thing. Ever think that your secret self loathing towards yourself because you see yourself as unlikeable because of your hobby might actually make you um, well, unlikeable. I've gotten people that would have never thought about reading a comic to become avid fans because I am open and honest about them and better yet passionate.... you end up with folks going "what's he so fired up about"

And no, having a different set of standards for which books are acceptable in public is hypocrisy not only that, I am not even narcassistic enough to think that only the books I like are worthy of the public's view and others aren't. The only thing that would be more hypocritical is say Hitler actually being a black jew.


You don't view anything different than We3 and Pet Avengers? Seriously.

And no, I'm not an unlikeable person, I am immensely likable. I'll talk about the movies all the time, the comics I either hide or say are my brothers.

And yes, some books aren't worthy of public view. This is one of them.

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Postby spidertour02 » Sat Feb 13, 2010 12:02 pm

Jubilee wrote:Tails of the Pet Avengers #1.

Let's start with the name of the book shall we! Tails of the Pet Avengers!. Tails, as in pets have tails, and we're going to be reading many tales ahead. It was at this point I realised this book wasn't for me.


Really. From the title of the comic. Wow.

Jubilee wrote:First story is a tale of Frog Thor.. who is like Thor... only in Frog form, once I'd regained my composure, and started reading the comic again, was I in for a treat. It appears frog Thors clan of frogs, were under attack from a crocodile. What follwed was a three page fight scene with a crocodile. It was like a normal comic fight but with... animals. So to recap we get five pages of story, of which 60% are a fight between a character I couldn't care less about, and three crocodiles. Not a great start for the book. This is still probably my favorite story though.


The fight was the significant part of the story because of the "realization moment" that followed. You clearly missed the point.

Jubilee wrote:Then comes a Zabu comic! Was I ever excited. Zabu has found a dead dinosaur, some other dinosaurs fight him, and then he takes the original dead dinosaurs home. "I wonder what Ka-zar will think" exclaims Zabu. "Perhaps things can change in the savage land". If the art wasn't great in this story, I would have forgotten it even quicker.


Again, you missed the point. Zabu has always been characterized as a cold, bloodthirsty killer. This story was intended to "humanize" him (for lack of a better term :lol:), and it works like a charm.

This is when the comic falls apart. Some dog that Aunt May has gets it's own five page comic, and Spidertour jizzes his pants, whilst I die a little bit more inside. The first panel has the dialogue "yip" making it the third story to use that phrase so far. Apparently Aunt May has taken her dog on a cruise. We are then treated to a verbal fight between a seagul and a dog. The seagull teases the dog for being a "lap warmer". Awesome stuff! Aunt Mays dog then discovers a plan by two chefs to poison everyone on the ship, and then rob the ships casino. A stupid enough plan to begin with, but then when Aunt Mays dog pretends to eat a bit of the food, and pretends to "play dead" one of the chef feels bad and admits to trying to poison the entire ship. It's this chefs character which appeals to me the most. I especially like the scene where he's picking up peoples plates and throwing them onto the floor yelling about him poisoning the food. A great plan from a great character is foiled again by Aunt Mays stupid dog.


First of all, was it necessary to take a shot at me? Does that make you feel like a real woman? But that's okay, I get it -- you wouldn't have even reviewed this if I didn't show up in this thread.

Second, one of the major parts of the first miniseries was the sniping back-and-forth between Furball and Ms. Lion. Furball continually insisted that Ms. Lion was useless because of the dog's lack of superpowers or training. This story is an example of how Ms. Lion can get things done without powers. It's not like it was subtle or anything.

Jubilee wrote:Lockheeds story next! Lockheed fights the criminal "mad dog". Who as the scientist explains is a suprecriminal spliced with the genes of a "Mad dog" When Lockheed is around "I guess his primal instincts take over and he becomes well.. a MAD DOG" the comic tells us. Mad Dog is such an awesome character, and I was truly shocked when Lockheed defeated him. When Lockheed takes the stick of terrigen mists that Mad Dog stole back to the Inhumans, he's scolded and told "No I won't play fetch". At this point I set the comic down, a single tear rolled down my cheek, but somehow I forced myself to continue.


Um, no. That was Lockjaw. And by the way, snarkiness doesn't work when it's not funny.

Jubilee wrote:If you've got this far into the comic and want to read Lockheed turn up as some fat dragon girls date to prom. Then fair enough. Some girl is being bullied at school because she hates people and loves dragons. IMO I think she should be bullied, because that's fucking retarded. Anyway her teacher feels bad for her, and in the end Lockheed turns up with her to prom. So what? Am I supposed to care that some lame girl has now seen Lockheed. She's STILL GOT NO REAL LIFE FRIENDS AND WILL CONTINUE TO BE BULLIED. I hated these five pages.


I love that you make fun of the girl for being fat. I'll bet you're a real keeper.

Jubilee wrote:The last story is about Falcons bird and some other pidgeon. There is some puns like "Fantastic Fowl" or "Alpha Flight" they stop a random robber, I guess Falcons Falcon now has a pidgeon sidekick.


I think I understand what your problem is! The fact that things actually happen in five pages per story, as opposed to the glacial pacing of a typical Bendis story, overwhelms your mind and renders it incapable of understanding even the simplest of developments.

Jubilee wrote:The art in this was surprisingly decent.


Even your mild praise comes grudgingly ...

Jubilee wrote:2 out of 10


I'm not even going to say anything about this.

starlord wrote:Oh for pete's sake, Cupcake. Did you even have a childhood? Perhaps if the Pet Avengers were decapitating their villains and shooting one line gags at each other you may have liked it better.

What is it with you and fun books. Must the comic book world always be dark and dank for you to think it's a good comic?


Pretty much! Additional, unnecessary use of Yiddish would also pique the Twigg's interest. :P
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Postby doombug » Sat Feb 13, 2010 1:11 pm

wow twigg, just wow. :lol:
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Postby thefourthman » Sat Feb 13, 2010 1:19 pm

Jubilee wrote:You don't view anything different than We3 and Pet Avengers? Seriously.

And no, I'm not an unlikeable person, I am immensely likable. I'll talk about the movies all the time, the comics I either hide or say are my brothers.

And yes, some books aren't worthy of public view. This is one of them.

as a concept, no. People's pets become heroes and have a quest. They are the same. You hate Pet Avengers before you have even opened it up though, because it says all ages, is reported to be fun, and isn't written by Grant Morrison.

I don't know whether you are or aren't in real life. But hiding your hobby that means a great deal to you (evidenced by the amount of time you spend on this website) has to hinder you, not only in confidence (which is majorly important in being attractive to the opposite sex) but in likeability.

It's like this, people who have no problem with porn keep it on their shelf and get to watch and enjoy it with their partners, those that are ashamed by it, hide it in a box and conceal it from the world. Which is more fun?

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Postby Jubilee » Sat Feb 13, 2010 1:20 pm

Wait what? When has it ever worked like that?

I'm literally logging off now, because my girlfrieind is coming around and sleeping over for the night. Me hiding comics will have helped me to get her :lol:
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