Jubilee wrote:Tails of the Pet Avengers #1.
Let's start with the name of the book shall we! Tails of the Pet Avengers!. Tails, as in pets have tails, and we're going to be reading many tales ahead. It was at this point I realised this book wasn't for me.
Really. From the title of the comic. Wow.
Jubilee wrote:First story is a tale of Frog Thor.. who is like Thor... only in Frog form, once I'd regained my composure, and started reading the comic again, was I in for a treat. It appears frog Thors clan of frogs, were under attack from a crocodile. What follwed was a three page fight scene with a crocodile. It was like a normal comic fight but with... animals. So to recap we get five pages of story, of which 60% are a fight between a character I couldn't care less about, and three crocodiles. Not a great start for the book. This is still probably my favorite story though.
The fight was the significant part of the story because of the "realization moment" that followed. You clearly missed the point.
Jubilee wrote:Then comes a Zabu comic! Was I ever excited. Zabu has found a dead dinosaur, some other dinosaurs fight him, and then he takes the original dead dinosaurs home. "I wonder what Ka-zar will think" exclaims Zabu. "Perhaps things can change in the savage land". If the art wasn't great in this story, I would have forgotten it even quicker.
Again, you missed the point. Zabu has always been characterized as a cold, bloodthirsty killer. This story was intended to "humanize" him (for lack of a better term

), and it works like a charm.
This is when the comic falls apart. Some dog that Aunt May has gets it's own five page comic, and Spidertour jizzes his pants, whilst I die a little bit more inside. The first panel has the dialogue "yip" making it the third story to use that phrase so far. Apparently Aunt May has taken her dog on a cruise. We are then treated to a verbal fight between a seagul and a dog. The seagull teases the dog for being a "lap warmer". Awesome stuff! Aunt Mays dog then discovers a plan by two chefs to poison everyone on the ship, and then rob the ships casino. A stupid enough plan to begin with, but then when Aunt Mays dog pretends to eat a bit of the food, and pretends to "play dead" one of the chef feels bad and admits to trying to poison the entire ship. It's this chefs character which appeals to me the most. I especially like the scene where he's picking up peoples plates and throwing them onto the floor yelling about him poisoning the food. A great plan from a great character is foiled again by Aunt Mays stupid dog.
First of all, was it necessary to take a shot at me? Does that make you feel like a real woman? But that's okay, I get it -- you wouldn't have even reviewed this if I didn't show up in this thread.
Second, one of the major parts of the first miniseries was the sniping back-and-forth between Furball and Ms. Lion. Furball continually insisted that Ms. Lion was useless because of the dog's lack of superpowers or training. This story is an example of how Ms. Lion can get things done without powers. It's not like it was subtle or anything.
Jubilee wrote:Lockheeds story next! Lockheed fights the criminal "mad dog". Who as the scientist explains is a suprecriminal spliced with the genes of a "Mad dog" When Lockheed is around "I guess his primal instincts take over and he becomes well.. a MAD DOG" the comic tells us. Mad Dog is such an awesome character, and I was truly shocked when Lockheed defeated him. When Lockheed takes the stick of terrigen mists that Mad Dog stole back to the Inhumans, he's scolded and told "No I won't play fetch". At this point I set the comic down, a single tear rolled down my cheek, but somehow I forced myself to continue.
Um, no. That was Lockjaw. And by the way, snarkiness doesn't work when it's not funny.
Jubilee wrote:If you've got this far into the comic and want to read Lockheed turn up as some fat dragon girls date to prom. Then fair enough. Some girl is being bullied at school because she hates people and loves dragons. IMO I think she should be bullied, because that's fucking retarded. Anyway her teacher feels bad for her, and in the end Lockheed turns up with her to prom. So what? Am I supposed to care that some lame girl has now seen Lockheed. She's STILL GOT NO REAL LIFE FRIENDS AND WILL CONTINUE TO BE BULLIED. I hated these five pages.
I love that you make fun of the girl for being fat. I'll bet you're a real keeper.
Jubilee wrote:The last story is about Falcons bird and some other pidgeon. There is some puns like "Fantastic Fowl" or "Alpha Flight" they stop a random robber, I guess Falcons Falcon now has a pidgeon sidekick.
I think I understand what your problem is! The fact that things actually happen in five pages per story, as opposed to the glacial pacing of a typical Bendis story, overwhelms your mind and renders it incapable of understanding even the simplest of developments.
Jubilee wrote:The art in this was surprisingly decent.
Even your mild praise comes grudgingly ...
Jubilee wrote:2 out of 10
I'm not even going to say anything about this.
starlord wrote:Oh for pete's sake, Cupcake. Did you even have a childhood? Perhaps if the Pet Avengers were decapitating their villains and shooting one line gags at each other you may have liked it better.
What is it with you and fun books. Must the comic book world always be dark and dank for you to think it's a good comic?
Pretty much! Additional, unnecessary use of Yiddish would also pique the Twigg's interest.
