He's still having trouble with his conjunctions.
Early-onset Alzheimers apparently has you confusing After-School Specials with Schoolhouse Rock.
These were the morality stories like where Scott Baio got really high and ended up dead or something, or stuff about stutterers, handicapped people, pregnant teens, having crushes on cheerleaders, or nursing wounded deer back to health.
I buy and sell a lot of media, one of the discs in the set has a scratch I could never get buffed out. One day I want to buy one of the expensive DVD/CD polishers, but they cost a couple hundred bucks usually.