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[S.F. Jude Terror]

If a zombie apocalypse broke out tomorrow and you could band together with any five Outhousers, who would you want with you and in what order would they die.

[S.F. Jude Terror]

Strict31 for obvious reasons - he's fucking prepared.
Jsalwen because it would be endless entertainment to watch him fight with all the other survivors over every decision.
CountD would bring the weed.
Eltopo because I would want to protect the world's most valuable asset.
Nerdygirl because the std cocktail in her blood would likely ward off any zombie infection, and would eventually lead to a cure.

Strict would die first because he's the black guy (sorry man).
CountD next, bad knee.
Salwen would go down while arguing with the zombies about that not being the way he would eat him.
Topo next, because someone that pretty has to die young and leave a good looking (zombie) corpse.
Nerdygirl would never die for the abovementioned reasons.

[Benderbrau]

I'd pick all the fat ones so that the zombies would go after them first, giving me time to get away. Sorry Jude and Coyle.

[sdsichero]

This is tough. I'm torn on whether I'd have Zechs. On the one hand, he's drunk and insane so he'd probably wade into them and I have a chance to get away. On the other hand, if they are brain-eating zombies, they'd know there's no there there and come after me.

[Cat-Scratch]

[Strict31]

Jude, you do realize that in the zombie apocalypse movie formula, the black guy actually doesn't die first?

I mean, we see this over and over again; if there is a black guy who dies, he tends to be among the very few survivors who make it to the end of the movie before he finally gets killed.

Usually, it's the white guy who dies first. And since there are generally several white guys who die, the Zombie Apocalypse can be a dicey situation for whiteys. There are all sorts of white guy archetypes who tend to die first. Crazy-Eyes Whitey can die first, because he just can't take the strain. Redneck-Whitey can die first because Hollywood hates rednecks. Survivalist-Whitey can die first because that's just ironic.

And even those whiteys who do not die first still tend to die before the black guy. For example, in the Dawn of the Dead remake, Hero-Whitey died before Ving Rhames. Hell, don't even get to see Ving Rhames actually die. We can assume that he does, along with the few other survivors who escaped. But here's something uncomfortable for you guys to chew on: In that movie, it's pretty much just Ving Rhames and..well...two white bitches. Sure, they lack fine, big, juice-booties, and they're a bit on the stringy side. But still, there was just some scrawny little dude between Ving Rhames and two white bitches on a boat.

Do not place your faith in standard horror traditions during the Zombie Apocalypse.

[sdsichero]

Do zombies eat cats too?

This might determine another choice I make.

[Muppetesque]

Jude, you do realize that in the zombie apocalypse movie formula, the black guy actually doesn't die first?

I mean, we see this over and over again; if there is a black guy who dies, he tends to be among the very few survivors who make it to the end of the movie before he finally gets killed.

Usually, it's the white guy who dies first. And since there are generally several white guys who die, the Zombie Apocalypse can be a dicey situation for whiteys. There are all sorts of white guy archetypes who tend to die first. Crazy-Eyes Whitey can die first, because he just can't take the strain. Redneck-Whitey can die first because Hollywood hates rednecks. Survivalist-Whitey can die first because that's just ironic.

And even those whiteys who do not die first still tend to die before the black guy. For example, in the Dawn of the Dead remake, Hero-Whitey died before Ving Rhames. Hell, don't even get to see Ving Rhames actually die. We can assume that he does, along with the few other survivors who escaped. But here's something uncomfortable for you guys to chew on: In that movie, it's pretty much just Ving Rhames and..well...two white bitches. Sure, they lack fine, big, juice-booties, and they're a bit on the stringy side. But still, there was just some scrawny little dude between Ving Rhames and two white bitches on a boat.

Do not place your faith in standard horror traditions during the Zombie Apocalypse.

White bitches in tank tops always live -- that's WHY I wear tank tops all the time.

[sdsichero]

Usually, it's the white guy who dies first. And since there are generally several white guys who die, the Zombie Apocalypse can be a dicey situation for whiteys.

Does Jude count as several white guys?

[habitual]

White bitches in tank tops always live -- that's WHY I wear tank tops all the time.

Right, it's not just because you live in Jersey.

Hab

[Strict31]

But this remains a tough decision to make.

At the top of my list is TerriG, mainly because she';s a chick, and chicks will probably be needed after I totally punch the Zombie Apocalypse in its balls and begin to rebuild the human race. Of course, she's also a teacher, and has highly specialized geek and history survival skills. And she likes Star Trek.

Then, there's Keb, so that we could argue about who is more Street. This will provide an amusing source of conflict.

Greg for his knowledge of horror survival tactics.

Chap22, because he's from the South and therefore probably has guns. Also, he'd be useful for helping me look smarter--ah-ah I say--smarter than I actually am. Which he routinely does by merely talking.

Hnutz because of his familiarity with things that have been fried so much they spontaneously transform into food. Such as fried pepsi. Plus, his wife can sing and provide entertainment.

Nieto because he would be like the moral center of the group, always bringing me back from the point of sheer ruthlessness to only sorta kinda ruthlessness. Plus, he's got experience dealing with mindless masses who refuse to listen to warnings.

BKsuch-n-such because the Zombies would almost completely disregard or ignore his presence, which would make him useful for scavenging for supplies. Sorta like a non-Asian Glen from TWD.

Salwen, because we'll need a doctor. Even if he's kinda crazy sometimes.

Dairydead, because every time he kills a zombie, he'll feel sorry for doing so, and that will never start getting old.

And finally, GOSD, because I'll need an antagonistic figure who challenges my authority just because he's all rebel and shit. Plus, we'd probably run into Zombie Matt Brady, and it would be awesome to hear GOSD tell him, "I won, dick."

[Strict31]

White bitches in tank tops always live -- that's WHY I wear tank tops all the time.

Let's not be hasty in our generalizations. For example, your survival in this instance could be due to the fact you're Patient Zero, who is, of course, immune to but is a carrier of the virus.

Also, to the zombie virus too.

[Doc Jon]

Damn, this is tough.

I don't know of any mechanics/engineers on the OH. I figure people like that would be top priority.

[Timbales]

Doesn't matter, I'll just use them as my own Otis should the need arise. Except maybe Greg.

[Benderbrau]

Damn, this is tough.

I don't know of any mechanics/engineers on the OH. I figure people like that would be top priority.

Coyle's an architect IIRC but sadly his lack of posts lately leads me to believe that the zombies may have already gotten him.