Friday, June 22, 2018 • Evening Edition • "All nerds welcome. Bring your own toilet paper."
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Review Group Week 325 - DIAL H #1
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Hey you! Reader! Want to be a part of the GREATEST COMIC BOOK AND GEEK COMMUNITY on the web?! Well, they're not accepting new members, but we'll take anyone here, so why not sign up for a free acount? It's fast and it's easy, like your mom! Sign up today! Membership spots are limited!*
*Membership spots not really limited!
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This is what growing old feels like 
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Tyrants may change around here, but tastes rarely improve much.
Probably about to make some feeble attempt at diplomacy. This is not that Review Group. 
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Looks like it's either cuntrag or tenderfoot.  CHOOSE! |
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The premise is so absurd that it would make much more sense as satire, but this book is clearly trying to be serious, dark and gritty. Here's how absurd it is - an obese, down on his luck man who goes by the name Nelse finds himself in an old rotary style phone booth while his friend is getting gang beaten in a dark alley in front of him. He tries to call 911 but somehow instead ends up dialing 4376. Blame it on the chubby fingers. The phone booth glows brightly and within seconds Nelse busts out, fully transformed into a lanky freak named Boy Chimney who looks like a combination of the Red Skull and Jack Skellington. He proceeds to save his friend before changing back to himself. Later, ol' Nelse re-enters the phone booth and is this time bestowed the mighty powers of...Captain Lachrymose? A pathetic emo version of Superman who sports the same haircut as Gary Oldman in the Fifth Element and who's powers are derived from the deep sadness of those in his immediate vicinity? This must be a joke right? Well not intentionally. The dialogue between characters isn't bad. The writing in general isn't bad. It's the characters and the situations that are unbelievably bad. And that's a real shame too because Mateus Santolouco's pencils and inks are very nice to look at. He's got a strong sense of perspective and offers effective and varied page layouts with skill and swagger. There are a couple of collage type hallucinogenic ones that are a bit like Yanick Paquette's recent work in Swamp Thing and are pretty cool. The choice of colors, however, is bland and dull. Sure, they are going for a dark and dreary atmosphere but it would have been nice to see more variety in the tones. The stale brownish yellow from Smokestack McQuack's magic exhaust hat seems to permeate every page, drifting through the whole book and tainting it with it's foulness. Mixing in some other nuances of color would've done much to enrich the pencil work, instead of poisoning it. So with all things carefully balanced and weighed; this is a terrible comic book. DC and Marvel publish so much of this type of garbage so it must sell well enough to be worth it. But there's no way "Dial H" makes it passed the twelve issue mark. DC will let it bleed long enough to make two trades out of it before tying it off and amputating. In a word, "Dial H" is hopeless. 3 out of 10 (It should be mentioned that I've never read, and know nothing about the old series that this one is resurrecting, which no doubt contributes to my perspective on it.) |
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 vote, vote, vote... the-news-stand/review-group-poll-for-may-9th-t81034.html |
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 A little late, but if your LCS is lame or you just happen to hate paper... http://www.comixology.com/Dial-H-2012-1 ... /MAR120153 |
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No worries, that was pretty good actually. 
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A zero? Holy crap man, it wasn't great, but it was nowhere near that bad. 
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The story itself was alright, nothing spectacular, but strangely, I can't say I found it boring either. The writing does show potential, Boy Chimney's lines while fighting in the ally were fun to read I will admit. I agree that the main villain was kind of paint by numbers, but his "mother" suggests that there may be more to him. A potential does exist for something a little more interesting even there. It wasn't a horrible comic, it wasn't a middle of the road five, and as I said, I wasn't great either. That makes it a 6 out of 10 in my book. There is enough there for me to want to see where things go. |
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he's apparently from cbr's boards...should tell you something about him right off the bat.
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You sir, are a jerk faced nincompoop. What... ...you said you liked it when we called each other names.  
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