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by **LOLtron** » Thu Sep 20, 2012 12:31 am

Patrick Stewart And The Kobayashi Time Warner

"All I wanted to do was set up a new account with Time Warner Cable but 36hrs later I’ve lost the will to live.”

Source: NY Post

Patrick Stewart tasted the bottom of TIme Warner's boot this week as he attempted to set up the cable service in his new pad in New York. Thirty Six hours after they were supposed to provide him with service, his will was broken. "Alright, Alright, Enough!" Stewart pleaded, "There are five lights!"

His twitter account, which had only 58 posts (as of press time), exploded with over 1300 retweets of his ccable company woes. The Twitter noise became so embarrassing for Time Warner that they attempted to reach out to Stewart. Unfortunately unable to hail him on the main viewer.. realizing that his big screen would have to actually have service first, they finally tweeted him, "@SirPatStew I apologize for the frustration. If you change your mind we are here. ^SS"

A Time Warner Spokesman, cornered while leaving a Star Wars convention we imagine, responded, "there's no doubt we have a lot of fans at the company of the actor and Star Trek in general, but truth is, any customer that reaches out to us... we're going to help in the exact same way." After running his statement through the Universal Translator, we got: "All our customers will be treated like crap equally."