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DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toasters

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DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toasters

Postby LOLtron » Tue May 15, 2012 5:04 pm

DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen ToastersDC will produce Watchmen branded toasters - yes, toasters - as part of a new Warner Bros. home appliance branding initiative.



In the "we swear we're not making this up" department, The Outhouse received a press release from Dynamic Forces today advertising a new line of toasters branded with iconic Warner Bros. properties, including Alan Moore's oft-exploited Watchmen. The toasters singe an image from the property into the bread as it is toasting, reportedly, "making a fun impression on your breakfast, lunch, or midnight snack." So if you're the type of person who believes midnight toast binges would be greatly improved by a burnt image of Doctor Manhattan's dong, this the product you've been waiting for.

Fanboys have spent the better part of 2012 arguing over the controversy created when DC announced that they would be producing Watchmen prequels titled Before Watchmen, and Moore himself has been vocally critical of the prequel project, as well as all other adaptations of his work, all comic book projects done after 1995, and bread cooking devices of any kind. The Outhouse reached out to Moore for comment, but was rebuffed sternly by his beard.

Other properties up for the toaster treatment are The Wizard of Oz, Gremlins, Nightmare on Elm Street (yum!), and Where the Wild Things Are. Look for these toasters, and hopefully more kitchen appliances, in September.

Here's the Press Release, in case you don't believe us:

WARNER BROS. CONSUMER PRODUCTS ANNOUNCES ICONIC IMAGES BRANDED ON TOASTERS ONLY FROM DYNAMIC FORCES IN 2012

May 15th, 2012 - Runnemede, NJ - Dynamic Forces is proud to announce our newest license with Warner Bros. Consumer Products for a line of collector toasters!

The new toaster collection will showcase iconic imagery featuring Warner Bros. properties ranging from classic movies to hit television series. The license includes such properties as The Wizard of Oz, A Christmas Story, Where the Wild Things Are, The Goonies, Gremlins, Little Shop of Horrors, Watchmen, Friday the 13th, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Mad Magazine, Friends, AND MORE! The first toaster is scheduled to be on sale September 2012.

These collector toasters will imprint iconic images from your favorite Warner Bros. films and television series onto slices of bread to make a fun impression on your breakfast, lunch or midnight snack! The extra-wide slots allow you to not only toast bread, but also bagels and more. UL tested and approved, it includes illuminated function buttons for cancel, reheat and frozen. The toaster design is a beautiful glossy black finish featuring the logo from the film or television series, and is a compliment to any counter top.

This makes a great gift for any fan of these classic films and TV shows! Once the timer dings, it's all fun with your Warner Bros. favorites right in the middle of your morning slice of toast. Collect them all, starting September 2012!"Dynamic Forces is excited to work with Warner Bros. Consumer Products to release these collectible image toasters that capture the spirit of some of Warner Bros.' most admired properties and timeless brands," states President of Dynamic Forces, Nick Barrucci. "We're thrilled to give fans the opportunity to interact with their favorite brands and characters in a new way."



DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toasters

DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toasters

DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toasters

DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toasters

About Warner Bros. Consumer Products

Warner Bros. Consumer Products, a Warner Bros. Entertainment Company, is one of the leading licensing and retail merchandising organizations in the world.

ABOUT DYNAMIC FORCES

Dynamic Forces is the comic-book and collectible industry's top producer of limited-edition and autographed memorabilia, including comic books and lithographs. DF functions as a packager of comics, ranking as high as one of the top five suppliers of Diamond Comic Distributors. It is also a premiere comic and entertainment supplier for the United States and international multimedia retailers.

DF continues to set the pace in the comic collector and comic memorabilia markets. Recent product line expansions includes: action figures, vinyl and poly resin statues, trading cards, lithographs, giclees, apparel and much more.

For updated information on Dynamic Forces specialty merchandise, product art, exclusive creator interviews, columns and upcoming product releases, please visit the Dynamic Forces website at www.dynamicforces.com.

To find a comic shop near you, call 1-888-comicbook

For art and more information, please visit:

http://www.dynamicforces.com

Also, if you're looking for more specials and coupons and DF updates, follow us on Twitter at:

http://twitter.com/DynamicForces


Source: Unbelievably Real Press Release
Written or Contributed by: Jude Terror


http://www.theouthousers.com/index.php/news/comics-news/19412-dc-is-just-fucking-with-alan-moore-now-watchmen-toasters.html/
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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby ElijahSnowFan » Tue May 15, 2012 5:07 pm

It doesn't even fucking matter if this is true or not. Either way, that's the funniest shit I've read in years. :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D
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*Sniff, sniff* "Damn it, Diana...If I'd known they would trade us in for a JT Krul-written Captain Atom and "The Savage Hawkman," I'd have let Superboy-Prime destroy all reality."

"Superman flies and is really strong...what the fuck else do you need to know?!" -- Hitler, expressing his displeasure about DC rebooting and complaints about continuity

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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby S.F. Jude Terror » Tue May 15, 2012 5:11 pm

ElijahSnowFan wrote:It doesn't even fucking matter if this is true or not. Either way, that's the funniest shit I've read in years. :-D :-D :-D :-D :-D


It's true, the PR came today from the official DF email.

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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby habitual » Tue May 15, 2012 5:16 pm

I so want a Rorschach piece of toast.

Hab

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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby ElijahSnowFan » Tue May 15, 2012 5:26 pm

S.F. Jude Terror wrote:
It's true, the PR came today from the official DF email.


Ha! Can you imagine that conversation?

DF: "Hey, DC...we'd kinda like to make some toasters with your characters. You got anyone who you think might fit that?"

DC: "Excuse me? Did you just say you wanted to make...toasters?"

DF: "Yeah, buddy. We know it's pretty much a cheap money-grab that plays on nostalgia, but they look cool, there's a sucker born every minute and we've got money to make. So quit jacking around and give us something to work with. Time is money, dudes. And you're wasting ours."

DC: "Huh. Well, OK then. How well do you think Doctor Manhattan's crotch bulge will translate on wheat?" :-D :-D :-D
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*Sniff, sniff* "Damn it, Diana...If I'd known they would trade us in for a JT Krul-written Captain Atom and "The Savage Hawkman," I'd have let Superboy-Prime destroy all reality."

"Superman flies and is really strong...what the fuck else do you need to know?!" -- Hitler, expressing his displeasure about DC rebooting and complaints about continuity

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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby Amoebas » Tue May 15, 2012 5:29 pm

Ha - awesome.

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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby DMM » Tue May 15, 2012 6:11 pm

I wonder what images will be baked onto the toast? Will there be a different image on each side of the toast? I imagine one of the Watchmen images will be Rorschach's inkblots (like pictured on the side of the box).
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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby Rikk Odinson » Tue May 15, 2012 6:21 pm

Amoebas wrote:Ha - awesome.



Verily.

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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby GLX » Tue May 15, 2012 6:29 pm

:smt011 :smt011 :smt011
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john lewis wrote:Everyone but GLX has no taste.

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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby sdsichero » Tue May 15, 2012 7:17 pm

Alan Moore what do you read in this piece of Rorschach toast from the Watchmen toaster?

AM: "It looks like... FU Alan Moore..."

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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby GHERU » Tue May 15, 2012 7:20 pm

:-D
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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby prozacman » Tue May 15, 2012 7:55 pm

You think we would have gotten a Rorschach Lava Lamp by now.

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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby Miracloman » Tue May 15, 2012 8:00 pm

habitual wrote:I so want a Rorschach piece of toast.

Hab


I was imagining The Comedian badge toast covered with strawberry jelly.
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Re: DC is Just Fucking With Alan Moore Now - Watchmen Toaste

Postby bkthomson » Tue May 15, 2012 8:37 pm

habitual wrote:I so want a Rorschach piece of toast.

Hab



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