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Gaiman to Retire from Book Signings

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LOLtron

Rain Partier

Postby LOLtron » Thu Dec 20, 2012 3:11 pm

Gaiman to Retire from Book Signings

The popular writer of many things, including comics, says the tour for The Ocean at the End of the Lane will be his last.



Source: CBR

Sorry, losers. Neil Gaiman doesn't feel like signing your books any more. Deal with it.

Gaiman, the favorite author of everyone who doesn't read any other real novels, is embarking on a tour for his new book, The Ocean at the End of the Lane, but he says that it will be his last.

"Really, what are you going to do about it," Gaiman would have said if he wasn't being polite. "You're going to buy my books no matter what. There's really nothing for me to gain from this, and I have better things I could be doing with my valuable time."

Instead of spending hours signing his name for adoring fans who plunk down $23.99 for his bestselling novels, Gaiman plans to spend time with his weirdo art-rock girlfriend, Amanda Palmer, of the emo band Dresden Dolls. "We've got a performance art thing planned where Neil will pour pig urine all over me in a glass box at Piccadilly Circus," Palmer told us, or would have if we had actually spoken to her. "It'll be deep and fucking meaningful."

Gaiman hopes that people will respect his wishes and his right to privacy in this matter, just as he and Jonathan Ross did in the 2007 documentary In Search of Steve Ditko when, after being told by Ditko that he didn't want any visitors, Ross and Gaiman barged up to his office to harass him anyway.

The Ocean at the End of the Lane hits stores on June 18, 2013.



Written or Contributed by Jude Terror




READ THIS ARTICLE ON THE FRONT PAGE, HUMANS!
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Tintin Quarantino

Rain Partier

Postby Tintin Quarantino » Thu Dec 20, 2012 3:16 pm

A smug dick said what?
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S.F. Jude Terror

OMCTO

Postby S.F. Jude Terror » Thu Dec 20, 2012 3:16 pm

Victorian Squid wrote:A smug dick said what?


:lol: I was thinking of you the whole time I was writing this one.
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Tintin Quarantino

Rain Partier

Postby Tintin Quarantino » Thu Dec 20, 2012 3:17 pm

S.F. Jude Terror wrote:
:lol: I was thinking of you the whole time I was writing this one.


I was like, damn give me a "LIKE" button to click!! :-D
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Lord Simian

The Lord of the Monkeys

Postby Lord Simian » Thu Dec 20, 2012 3:19 pm

I think he and palmer are married...
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Tintin Quarantino

Rain Partier

Postby Tintin Quarantino » Thu Dec 20, 2012 3:24 pm

Lord Simian wrote:I think he and palmer are married...


Yeah, I think Neil Gaiman let all the people attending sign his wife with a Sharpie marker.
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ThatGuyRoman

dINGO

Postby ThatGuyRoman » Thu Dec 20, 2012 3:48 pm

Lord Simian wrote:I think he and palmer are married...



I was going to say, he's still the likable one in his marriage.

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