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A new Marvel teaser revealed the news.
The Outhouse would like to congratulate Jason Aaron and Simone Bianchi on their recently announced pregnancy. The couple announced the baby via a Marvel NOW! teaser sent out by Marvel. According to the teaser, which has the word "Birth" on it, the baby is due in April.
We're unsure how the couple conceived the child, but Outhouse genetics expert Jude Terror theorized that the overwhelming amounts of male creators in the comic book industry might have spontaneously caused some to grow a uterus. "It's like Jurassic Park, only with writers," said Terror. Coincidentally, this would also explain why the Outhouse tends to avoid conventions, where packs of writers are known to corner and devour snarky news writers.
Anyways, congratulations to the happy couple. We're presuming that the child's name will be Logan Aaron-Bianchi if it's a boy or Logan Aaron-Bianchi if it's a girl due to Aaron's deep immense, almost reverent love of all things Wolverine. We'd imagine the child would follow in his father's footsteps of becoming a heralded Marvel employee and turning his favorite character into a Mary Sue superhero devoid of any real conflict while simultaneously ruining any character that stood in his way.
The Outhouse reached out to Cullen Bunn, himself a genetically engineered super-writer, to ask if the new baby was a threat to his ascendancy to the Marvel throne, but he had his guards remove us from the Marvel offices. We thank Mr. Bunn for his mercy in not having us beheaded.
Written or Contributed by ThanosCopter
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