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Big Tentacles: Cullen Christian, Kirk Frentz, Terrelle Pryor, and more.

Big Tentacles: Cullen Christian, Kirk Frentz, Terrelle Pryor, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 22, 2011

Michigan getaway? Michigan cornerback Cullen Christian is reportedly making plans transfer from the Wolverine program. (Detroit Free Press)  Ahead of the curve? Northwestern trainer Ryan Collins says that Wildcats quarterback Dan Persa's recovery from his Achilles' tendon injury is "ahead of schedule." (Rivals.com) There is trouble with the Trees. Northwestern and Stanford agree to a four game series between the schools in 2019-2022. (The Chicago Tribune) The Rubber Hawkeye circuit. Iowa head football coach Kirk Frentz and AD Gary Barta spoke to Hawkeye boosters at a Polk County I-Club gathering in Clive, IA. (The Gazette) Time to panic in Columbus? Apparently none of the Ohio State quarterbacks looking to fill-in for the suspended Terelle Pryor when the Buckeyes' 2011 season begins have had a stellar showing during spring practice. (Along the Olentangy) Chucky chats up about Pryor. Meanwhile, Jon Gruden believes Terrelle Pryor has a place in the NFL as a QB, or at least isn't saying he can't be a NFL QB. (The Columbus Dispatch) Dead Ringers?  Have you ever seen Minnesota head football coach Jerry Kill and Goldie the Gopher in the same place in the same time? This and other subjects as Off-Tackle Empire lets fellow SB Nation bloggers rake Minnesota over the coals. (Off-Tackle Empire) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Covering Dixie Like Mildew, Derek Dooley, Tyler Bray, Aaron Murray, and more.

Covering Dixie Like Mildew, Derek Dooley, Tyler Bray, Aaron Murray, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 21, 2011

I'll Stand By You. Tennessee head football coach Derek Dooley stands behind quarterback Tyler Bray despite his Orange and White Game struggles. (ESPN) Bray's still chillin'. Meanwhile, despite the Orange and White Game issues, Bray still tried to keep the "flatliner" mentality that helped him become a breakout star at the end of last season. (ESPN) Georgia QB Aaron Murray is The SEC's  "franchise player."  Because Edward Aschoff says so. (ESPN) Age Ain't Nothing But a Number. Auburn head football coach Gene Chizik says freshman quarterback Kiehl Frazier's youth wouldn't be an issue if he gave Auburn "the best chance of winning." (al.com) Only the Strong Survive.  Bruce Feldman names names Alabama defensive tackle Josh Chapman as the strongest man in college football. Then hides eight of the other nine players on the list behind a paywall so you have pay to have to find out who eight of the other ten are besides Chapman and Michigan's Mike Martin. (ESPN) My Sugar Daddy likes me more than your Sugar Daddy! Kristi Dosh (a.k.a Miz Sports Biz) looks at what SEC schools get the most money from contributions from donors. (The Business of College Sports) Speaking of/to Sugar Daddies... Florida head football coach Will Muschamp began his inaugural tour of the various Florida booster clubs by speaking at the Polk County Gator Club in Lakeland, FL. (The Gainesville Sun) Kentucky spring practice "review." Bluegrass? Well, some kind of grass may have been involved in the creation of this. But it sure wasn't blue. These reviews BotB is doing may be the closest thing the SEC's gotten to some of Black Heart Gold Pants' bat-guano insanity. (The Belly of the Beast) And from the "Why should Kentucky have all the fun?" department: Vanderbilt gets the same treatment, complete with guest appearances by former Vandy head coach Robbie Caldwell, and lots of his turkey friends. (The Belly of the Beast) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Harvey Updyke's attorney claims attack on his client during call to Finebaum Show.

Harvey Updyke's attorney claims attack on his client during call to Finebaum Show.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 20, 2011

Accused Toomer's Corner tree poisoner Harvey Updyke was allegedly attacked in a nearby Tiger Express gas station shortly after he had appeared in court a preliminary hearing (which he waived)on charges of "first degree criminal mischief. (Insert ironic comment here.) The news was relayed by Updyke's attorney, Glennon Threatt, in a call to sports radio host/Svengali Paul Finebaum. (Well, who else would you expect Threatt to call?) "Somewhere right outside of Opelika, Harvey stopped at a gas station to get a drink and some gas and when he got out of his car, it went black." Threatt said. "He woke up on the ground. He'd been hit in the head with something. So he wandered into the gas station, in pain, and they directed him to a local emergency room. He responded to that emergency room." Updyke didn't require stitches, according to Threatt, but may have "a slight concussion." (Listen to Threatt's call here.) He also claimed that the alleged attacker called a Montgomery television station to report (falsely) that Updyke had been stabbed. An Opelika police captain told the Opelika Daily News that Updyke's injuries were "minor" and could result in misdemeanor charges following an investigation, but added that Updyke couldn't identify or describe the assailant and the gas station didn't have video surveillance in the parking lot: "[Updyke] has not really been too cooperative at this point." Matt Hinton of Dr. Saturday is is skeptical of the story, saying "The fact that Threatt actually had to say, on the air, "I had nothing to do with my client getting attacked at a gas station" should raise your cynicism meter to the appropriate level re: the veracity of his and/or his client's account" Finebaum has posted on Twitter that "Threatt says the doctors told Updyke his injuries are consistent with being hit in the head with a wooden board." Already an Opelika-Auburn News beat reporter David Morrison replied on Twitter by naming  WWE Hall-of-Famer "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan as a suspect in the case. The Updyke case seems to become more of a tragedy and a farce  as time goes on.  At the same time, every new twist doesn't seem to come as a much of a surprise, either. (via Dr. Saturday,  al.com) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Northwestern wants to play at Wrigley Field again. Really?

Northwestern wants to play at Wrigley Field again. Really?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 20, 2011

Last season's game between the in-state Big Ten rivals Illinois and Northwestern at one of the last of America's great baseball parks may have sounded like a good idea on paper, but the execution of the game will go down as one of the more infamous moments in college football history. With a cramped east end zone declared unsafe by the Big Ten, the game was played using only half the field. Despite the  double embarrassment playing with under the abnormal the field conditions and losing to Illinois 48-27 (though the later can partially be accounted to the loss of quarterback Dan Persa the week before), Northwestern wants to begin playing games at Wrigley Field on an annual basis. The Chicago Tribune reports that despite the field debacle, the game did well financially, and both Northwestern and the Chicago Cubs would like to see a yearly Wildcat trip to the Windy City. With one big caveat involving funding for renovations to Wrigley. "The Nov. 20 game was such a financial and marketing success that Cubs and Northwestern officials have talked about putting an annual Wrigley Field game on the calendar, sources told the Tribune. But that won't happen until the Cubs renovate their ballpark. Once it secures funding, the team hopes to create space for a regulation 100-yard field by manipulating walls in at least one dugout area." Someone should have thought of that before last year's game. Still the idea of playing at Wrigley does show a renewed interest by Northwestern in being a serious contender in the Big Ten. (via The Chicago Tribune. HT:  Off-Tackle Empire and CBS Sports) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Ryan Mallett, Tyler Bray, Gene Chizik, and more.

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Ryan Mallett, Tyler Bray, Gene Chizik, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 19, 2011

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC  news, with the occasional pesky Southern school from another conference.)   Least. Shocking. News. Ever. This Week.  Ryan Mallett reportedly admitted drug use to an unnamed NFL general manager . (Pro Football Weekly) Panic in the streets of Knoxville. Tennessee fans should be worried about Tyler Bray's maturation process as a quarterback in the Orange and White Game. Because Mark Wiedmer said so. Shut up, Mark.(Chatanooga Times-Free Press) Oh no they shouldn't! Rocky Top Talk gives a spirited retort to Wiedmer's comments. (Rocky Top Talk) Derek Dooley's ESPN profile. The World Wide Leader takes on His Hairness. (ESPN) Speak No Evil.  LSU is silent while the NCAA is working on a report on "alleged recruiting improprieties." (The Times-Picayune) Chizik gets Bronx cheer at Talladega.  Gene Chizik  got booed at the Aaron's 499 at Talladega  on Sunday. Partly because there were Alabama fans in attendance, and partially because he wasn't Dale Earnhart Jr. (CBS Sports) Here's a shocker.  The SEC had ten schools on a list of spring game attendance figures. All of them had more than 25,000 spectators at the games each. (CBS Sports) Alabama A-Day "review." And yes, the Nick Saban statue gets some well-deserved skewering. (The Belly of the Beast) That Don't Impress Me Much.  Chadd Scott is still "Not Yet Ready to Believe in Georgia." Shut up, Chadd. (ChuckOliver.net) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Purdue Pete's makeover shelved by Purdue.

Purdue Pete's makeover shelved by Purdue.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 19, 2011

From the "Well, that didn't last long" department": Purdue has shelved the "new-look" Purdue Pete faster than Alabama shelved Mike Price after that little trip to that strip club. The semi-official mascot was given a facelift to allegedly make him less scary to children (and other living things). The results, however weren't quite universally loved, and the Purdue officials gave the "new" Pete the heave-ho. "The fans have spoken, and we are listening," athletic director Morgan Burke said Wednesday afternoon. "They like the Purdue Pete they've known for the last 30 years, and that's the one we're going with." It's a shame that Jim Delany and the Big Ten couldn't listen to the people when they introduced the "Leaders" and "Legends" divisions. (via The Indianapolis Star. HT: Kegs N' Eggs) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Donors raked University of Tennessee administration over the coals during Bruce Pearl scandal.

Donors raked University of Tennessee administration over the coals during Bruce Pearl scandal.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 18, 2011

How did donors to the University of Tennessee handle the Bruce Pearl firing? Not so well. Through a series of e-mailed uncovered by  Knoxville News Sentinel using a public records request, donors lashed out at both Tennessee Chancellor Jimmy Cheek athletic director Mike Hamilton over how the issue was handled. "The 14 donor email messages and a handful of others between UT officials and trustees were released Friday in response to a News Sentinel public records request. The names of the donors, all of whom each contributed more than $100,000 to the university, were redacted because of state laws protecting donor identities. Despite the threats to pull donations, athletic department spokesman Jimmy Stanton said officials have not seen a decline in contributions and that there has been more positive feedback since the hiring of new coach Cunozo Martin.  “More than likely in an emotionally charged situation, this is always to be expected,” Stanton said of the negative email." Highlights of the e-mails include jabs at Cheek and University of Tennessee President Joe DiPietro's University of Florida connections.   "On March 20, the day before Pearl was notified of his dismissal, one donor told UT President Joe DiPietro  to “call off your little (fellow) attack gator, Cheek. What are you AgHeads thinking???” The comment referenced both DiPietro’s and Cheek’s connection to the University of Florida, where both served before coming to UT, and their agriculture department backgrounds." Just to show how delusional some of the e-mails were, one donor even threw womens' basketball coach Pat Summit under the bus. “Hamilton has splintered the fan base of Tennessee and been an embarrassment to UT fans across the country along with the coaches he hired,” the email reads. “I would love to be president for just a day. I’d fire that self-promoting inept AD, promote Pat Summitt, then you could have your job back.” The Knoxville News Register reports the majority of the e-mailers supported Pearl, which makes one wonder about the ethical standards of those supposed "$100,000-plus donors." Although at least one donor had the right idea to chastise Pearl, the one who actually committed the violations that could result in the Volunteers getting ban-hammered by the NCAA. "On March 19, one donor was so upset by Pearl’s comments following UT’s NCAA tournament blowout loss to the University of Michigan — “We got into this together and we should see it through together,” Pearl had said — that he wrote Hamilton about them. “This is way more than I can choke down. I am incensed at the arrogant ignorance of that comment. I, and thousands of other Tennessee supporters, had nothing to do with HIS actions. I worry for you … and some others that are caught in this meat grinder,” wrote the donor." At least there is one rich person in Tennessee with a lick of sense. That should make some people breathe easier. (via Go Vols Xtra) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Steve Spurrier, Tyler Bray, Branden Smith, and more.

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Steve Spurrier, Tyler Bray, Branden Smith, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 17, 2011

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC  news, with the occasional pesky Southern school from another conference.)  Will Alabama and Auburn go "From back-to-back champions to back-to-back probations?"  Joe Solomon ponders the idea of both schools going on NCAA probation. (al.com) Mo' Money for Spurrier.  South Carolina gives head football coach Steve Spurrier a raise for the next three seasons, but not a contract extension. (ChuckOliver.net) Bray's sophomore slump? Tyler Bray struggled in Tennessee's Orange and White Game.  (Go Vols Xtra) Arkansas loses Broderick Green for 2011 season.  The wide receiver suffered a torn anterior cruciate ligament in his left knee during a practice session. (The Slophouse) Ross Rassner suspended. Arkansas suspends linebacker Ross Rassner indefinitely after his arrest for "being a minor in possession of alcohol and possession of a controlled substance" namely marijuana. (Arkansas Sports 360) Branden Smith back in black.  Georgia offensive coordinator Mike Bobo was impressed with cornerback Branden Smith's performance as a member of the Black team during the G-Day game on Saturday. (Athens Banner-Herald) Please come to Oxford for the springtime.  The Belly of the Beast gives its case for Stephen Garcia to transfer to Ole Miss. (The Belly of the Beast) More appropriate fact than you think of the day: ESPN lists Stephen Garcia's hometown as Lutz, Florida. Well, he certainly has applied more than enough of the lutz lately. (ESPN) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Nick Saban's statue is finally unveiled.

Nick Saban's statue is finally unveiled.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 17, 2011

The wait is finally over for the unveiling to the public of Nick Saban's statue on Alabama's Walk of Champions. And it is scarier than you could ever imagine.   Not only will Alabama be able Nick Saban for generations to come now, it will also be able to scare the crows away from the area of Bryant-Denny Stadium. Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Big Tentacles: Dan Persa, Michigan State, Kirk Cousins, and more.

Big Tentacles: Dan Persa, Michigan State, Kirk Cousins, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 16, 2011

(Big Tentacles is the SWRT look at the Big Ten and the schools it not-so-secretly covets.)   Yeah, I know. The new Purdue Pete isn't looking any better. This is what a Cabbage Patch Kid grows up to look like. Persa not quite good to go yet.  Northwestern quarterback Dan Persa, who is still recovering from a torn Achilles' Tendon,  won't be taking part in the Wildcat's spring game Saturday. But he should be getting medical clearance to take part in the Wildcats' summer practices by June 1. (The Chicago Tribune) Linthicum gets probation. Michigan State tight end Brian Linthicum agreed to a plea bargain deal giving him a year's probation for his involvement in an incident in Colorado. (Lansing State Journal) Kirk Cousins is the new Stewart Scott. Michigan State quarterback Kirk Cousins is trying to revive the term "Boo Ya!" In a word, Kirk, don't. (The Only Colors) Meet James Abbrederis.  Wisconsin walk-on Jared Abbrederis has gone from fighting for a spot on the team to being one of the players who are standing out during spring practice. (Wisconsin State Journal) I come to bury the Iowa-Illinois rivarly, not praise it.  Looking at the rivalry between The Buckeyes and the Fighting Illini, who haven't played each other since 2008. Thanks to Big Ten scheduling, the two schools won't play each other until at least 2015 at the earliest. (Black Heart Gold Pants) What's a Purdue loss to Indiana on the football field feel like?  Apparently it feels like a burning void of pain, emptiness and self doubt that is greater than the emotional wasteland formed deep in the soul after listening to every song ever recorded by The Cure rolled together into one mournful dirge of unfathomable sorrow. (Off Tackle Empire) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Shirts Without Random Triangles: Minnesota Gopher Boy t-shirt is so two-thousand-and-late.

Shirts Without Random Triangles: Minnesota Gopher Boy t-shirt is so two-thousand-and-late.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 15, 2011

Never let it be said that the University of Minnesota isn't trying to make itself seem hip. After all, the Land of a Thousand Lakes has given us Bob Dylan, Prince, and The Replacements (just for starters). But gee whiz, the latest attempt to make the school keep up with pop culture seems, well, awkward. First of all, let it be known that this fashion faux pas is in relation to this video, which is a response to that annoying "Teach Me How to Bucky"  video abomination that crawled out of Wisconsin. Of course, what better way to respond to a parody of a still semi-current song than with a song straight out of...2007? Heck, that's ancient history when it comes to hip hop culture. "Crank Dat Soulja Boy" is so two-thousand-and-late (even more than the line "two-thousand-and-late"). (via SB Nation) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Les Miles kissed a pig, and liked it.

Les Miles kissed a pig, and liked it.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 15, 2011

What if I told you an SEC coach locked lips with a farm animal? Which coach would be your first guess to have done the deed? Yeah, it probably would be Les Miles, wouldn't it? The fun-loving, grass eating, head football coach of LSU joined six other university luminaries in the school's annual "Kiss the Pig" fundraising event, which raised money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. No word if Miles wore any cherry Chapstick while he kissed the pig. Or if the pig's boyfriend didn't mind it happening. (via WBRZ. HT And the Valley Shook) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Auburm, Les Miles, Ryan Mallett, and...John Daly?

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Auburm, Les Miles, Ryan Mallett, and...John Daly?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 15, 2011

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC  news, with the occasional pesky Southern school from another conference.)  Another day, Another Auburn investigation. This time the NCAA is taking a look at the now-defunct "Tiger Prowl" to see if any funny business went on inside the Auburn bus. (SB Nation) It's too soon for Auburn to erect a Cam Newton statue. because Kevin Scarbinsky says so. Shut up, Kevin. (al.com) Florida is "a launching pad for successful coaching careers." Because Pat Dooley says so. Though some people are going to take issue with Ron Zook being on the list. (The Gainesville Sun) Les Miles has a language all his own. And trying to translate it without a Rosetta Stone is a dangerous job. (Alexandria Town Talk) Faster than a speeding bullet?  ESPN's Chris Low takes a look at the SEC's fastest (and yes, probably most furious) players. (ESPN) Green Thoughts. Marc Weizer looks at the Georgia wideouts looking to take A.J. Green's place. (Athens Banner-Herald) The Lott IMPACT Trophy watch list. With a whole Lott (sorry) of SEC defensive players. (Lott IMPACT Trophy official website) LSU linebacker Ryan Baker and Tennessee running back Tauren Poole are the SEC representatives on Rivals.com's Olin Buchanan's list of players whose performances in 2010 were somehow overlooked. (Rivals.com) Catch  a Falling Star? Heisman winner Mark Ingram NFL Draft stock seems to be heading in a downward trend. (Roll 'Bama Roll) Vols' Smith injured. Tennessee defensive end Jacques Smith suffers an injured foot during practice, and will be out of action until at least June. (Go Vols Xtra)  Look upon Houston Nutt's works, ye mighty, and despair! A cataloging of things all or partially destroyed by the Ole Miss head football coach, including huge swaths of the English Language. (The Belly of the Beast) Ryan Mallett visits Camp Chucky. The former Arkansas quarterback has a meeting of the minds (?) with Jon Gruden, with a special guest appearance by John Daly to boot.  (Friends of the Program) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Video of the instillation of Nick Saban's statue.

Video of the instillation of Nick Saban's statue.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 15, 2011

Here's some video of the instillation of Nick Saban's  graven image onto the University of Alabama's walk of champions. It seems the reporter on the scene got a little too dramatic in describing the statue's delivery via helicopter. The reporter didn't really say "It was as if he descended from the clouds of Heaven," did she? Oh snap, she did! No, it did not descend from Heaven. It descended from a freaking helicopter!  Get your facts straight, dangit! This is why the rest of America mocks Alabama, and the South as well. (via WVUA-TV on YouTube) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Nick Saban's graven image is under wraps at Alabama.

Nick Saban's graven image is under wraps at Alabama.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 14, 2011

Is that The Mummy? Nope. It's the tightly-wrapped statue of Nick Saban, which has finally arrived to its place of honor on Alabama's Walk of Champions. It will finally be unveiled before the A-Day Game on Saturday. Despite reports, the statue will not "breathe fire." Nor will it be able to transform into a giant sandstorm to pummel Tuscaloosa (or Auburn, for that matter). (via @UA_Athletics  on Twitter,  Off the Bench) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

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