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Big Tentacles: Dan Persa, Michigan State, Kirk Cousins, and more.

Big Tentacles: Dan Persa, Michigan State, Kirk Cousins, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 16, 2011

(Big Tentacles is the SWRT look at the Big Ten and the schools it not-so-secretly covets.)   Yeah, I know. The new Purdue Pete isn't looking any better. This is what a Cabbage Patch Kid grows up to look like. Persa not quite good to go yet.  Northwestern quarterback Dan Persa, who is still recovering from a torn Achilles' Tendon,  won't be taking part in the Wildcat's spring game Saturday. But he should be getting medical clearance to take part in the Wildcats' summer practices by June 1. (The Chicago Tribune) Linthicum gets probation. Michigan State tight end Brian Linthicum agreed to a plea bargain deal giving him a year's probation for his involvement in an incident in Colorado. (Lansing State Journal) Kirk Cousins is the new Stewart Scott. Michigan State quarterback Kirk Cousins is trying to revive the term "Boo Ya!" In a word, Kirk, don't. (The Only Colors) Meet James Abbrederis.  Wisconsin walk-on Jared Abbrederis has gone from fighting for a spot on the team to being one of the players who are standing out during spring practice. (Wisconsin State Journal) I come to bury the Iowa-Illinois rivarly, not praise it.  Looking at the rivalry between The Buckeyes and the Fighting Illini, who haven't played each other since 2008. Thanks to Big Ten scheduling, the two schools won't play each other until at least 2015 at the earliest. (Black Heart Gold Pants) What's a Purdue loss to Indiana on the football field feel like?  Apparently it feels like a burning void of pain, emptiness and self doubt that is greater than the emotional wasteland formed deep in the soul after listening to every song ever recorded by The Cure rolled together into one mournful dirge of unfathomable sorrow. (Off Tackle Empire) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Shirts Without Random Triangles: Minnesota Gopher Boy t-shirt is so two-thousand-and-late.

Shirts Without Random Triangles: Minnesota Gopher Boy t-shirt is so two-thousand-and-late.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 15, 2011

Never let it be said that the University of Minnesota isn't trying to make itself seem hip. After all, the Land of a Thousand Lakes has given us Bob Dylan, Prince, and The Replacements (just for starters). But gee whiz, the latest attempt to make the school keep up with pop culture seems, well, awkward. First of all, let it be known that this fashion faux pas is in relation to this video, which is a response to that annoying "Teach Me How to Bucky"  video abomination that crawled out of Wisconsin. Of course, what better way to respond to a parody of a still semi-current song than with a song straight out of...2007? Heck, that's ancient history when it comes to hip hop culture. "Crank Dat Soulja Boy" is so two-thousand-and-late (even more than the line "two-thousand-and-late"). (via SB Nation) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Les Miles kissed a pig, and liked it.

Les Miles kissed a pig, and liked it.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 15, 2011

What if I told you an SEC coach locked lips with a farm animal? Which coach would be your first guess to have done the deed? Yeah, it probably would be Les Miles, wouldn't it? The fun-loving, grass eating, head football coach of LSU joined six other university luminaries in the school's annual "Kiss the Pig" fundraising event, which raised money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. No word if Miles wore any cherry Chapstick while he kissed the pig. Or if the pig's boyfriend didn't mind it happening. (via WBRZ. HT And the Valley Shook) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Auburm, Les Miles, Ryan Mallett, and...John Daly?

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Auburm, Les Miles, Ryan Mallett, and...John Daly?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 15, 2011

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC  news, with the occasional pesky Southern school from another conference.)  Another day, Another Auburn investigation. This time the NCAA is taking a look at the now-defunct "Tiger Prowl" to see if any funny business went on inside the Auburn bus. (SB Nation) It's too soon for Auburn to erect a Cam Newton statue. because Kevin Scarbinsky says so. Shut up, Kevin. (al.com) Florida is "a launching pad for successful coaching careers." Because Pat Dooley says so. Though some people are going to take issue with Ron Zook being on the list. (The Gainesville Sun) Les Miles has a language all his own. And trying to translate it without a Rosetta Stone is a dangerous job. (Alexandria Town Talk) Faster than a speeding bullet?  ESPN's Chris Low takes a look at the SEC's fastest (and yes, probably most furious) players. (ESPN) Green Thoughts. Marc Weizer looks at the Georgia wideouts looking to take A.J. Green's place. (Athens Banner-Herald) The Lott IMPACT Trophy watch list. With a whole Lott (sorry) of SEC defensive players. (Lott IMPACT Trophy official website) LSU linebacker Ryan Baker and Tennessee running back Tauren Poole are the SEC representatives on Rivals.com's Olin Buchanan's list of players whose performances in 2010 were somehow overlooked. (Rivals.com) Catch  a Falling Star? Heisman winner Mark Ingram NFL Draft stock seems to be heading in a downward trend. (Roll 'Bama Roll) Vols' Smith injured. Tennessee defensive end Jacques Smith suffers an injured foot during practice, and will be out of action until at least June. (Go Vols Xtra)  Look upon Houston Nutt's works, ye mighty, and despair! A cataloging of things all or partially destroyed by the Ole Miss head football coach, including huge swaths of the English Language. (The Belly of the Beast) Ryan Mallett visits Camp Chucky. The former Arkansas quarterback has a meeting of the minds (?) with Jon Gruden, with a special guest appearance by John Daly to boot.  (Friends of the Program) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Video of the instillation of Nick Saban's statue.

Video of the instillation of Nick Saban's statue.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 15, 2011

Here's some video of the instillation of Nick Saban's  graven image onto the University of Alabama's walk of champions. It seems the reporter on the scene got a little too dramatic in describing the statue's delivery via helicopter. The reporter didn't really say "It was as if he descended from the clouds of Heaven," did she? Oh snap, she did! No, it did not descend from Heaven. It descended from a freaking helicopter!  Get your facts straight, dangit! This is why the rest of America mocks Alabama, and the South as well. (via WVUA-TV on YouTube) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Nick Saban's graven image is under wraps at Alabama.

Nick Saban's graven image is under wraps at Alabama.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 14, 2011

Is that The Mummy? Nope. It's the tightly-wrapped statue of Nick Saban, which has finally arrived to its place of honor on Alabama's Walk of Champions. It will finally be unveiled before the A-Day Game on Saturday. Despite reports, the statue will not "breathe fire." Nor will it be able to transform into a giant sandstorm to pummel Tuscaloosa (or Auburn, for that matter). (via @UA_Athletics  on Twitter,  Off the Bench) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Big Tentacles: Illinois, Iowa, and more

Big Tentacles: Illinois, Iowa, and more

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 14, 2011

Illinois is removing 2,200 seats from Memorial Stadium due to being "too old to use." That and the fact that Memorial Stadium apparently had only one sellout in 2010.   (ESPN, Eleven Warriors) The Iowa Corn Growers Association is the new sponsor of the Iowa-Iowa State rivalry game. Of course they are. (Black Heart Gold Pants) Would Black Heart Gold Pants stoop so low as to mock the "new and improved" Purdue Pete? Of course it does. Make sure to check the reader comments on this one. Epic.  (Black Heart Gold Pants) What Northwestern football greats deserve a statue erected in their honor? And stop snickering. (Lake the Posts) Penn State "new" uniforms are officially unveiled. I said stop snickering, dangit! (Linebacker U) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Jim Tressel's Book Club

Jim Tressel's Book Club

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 14, 2011

With the days winding down before Oprah Winfrey ends her cultural dominance of daytime television, it also marks the end of Oprah's Book Club. So now who is going tell America what books to read? Well, there's always Glenn Beck to...oh wait, his show's been canceled going off the air too. Well here comes Jim Tressel to the rescue. While the embattled Ohio State coach is dealing with the mass hubris known as "TatGate" that he stepped in, he has taken time to do a little heavy reading. And according to his blog on Ohio State's official website,  he's had his staff and team join in the fun too. "As preparations for spring football began, our staff and team certainly had shared off-season experiences that provided tremendous opportunities to improve and grow. We learned a great deal about ourselves and about others. Prior to concerning ourselves with the fundamentals and techniques of the game of football, we felt as if we needed to make some personal decisions as we moved forward. Hence, we chose to read as a team the book, The Traveler's Gift by Andy Andrews. The Traveler's Gift is a simple book that outlines seven decisions that determine personal success. It has been an ideal teaching tool for us as we seek to grow with this young team. For nearly 25 years, I have been utilizing "team books", and I really feel that this book by Andy Andrews is the perfect book for our football family at this moment in time. We actually have Jerry Rudzinski, former Buckeye great, to thank for sharing this book with our staff. It has been a blessing to both the staff and players." The line about "shared off-season experiences that provided tremendous opportunities to improve and grow" has to be the mother of all understatements.  Though one wonders if a book that dealt with situations that were a little pertinent to the Buckeye player's lives may have been a little more appropriate. Like maybe A Payroll to Meet: A Story of Greed, Corruption, and Football at SMU, by David Whitford. Or maybe that's just wishful thinking. (Besides, they could just buy Pony Excess off of iTunes) (via OhioStateBuckeyes.com HT: Eleven Warriors) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Michigan looks at game in Dolphins' Sun-Life Stadium home.

Michigan looks at game in Dolphins' Sun-Life Stadium home.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 14, 2011

Michigan athletic director Dave Brandon went down to Naples, FL. to appear at an event sponsored U-M Alumni Club of Southwest Florida. He informed the attendees that Michigan is looking into playing a neutral-site game in the Sunshine State. Specifically at Sun-Life Stadium, home of the Miami Dolphins. "We've had some preliminary discussions with Stephen Ross about whether or not it would be possible to come down here and play a game," Brandon said Monday night at an event presented by the U-M Alumni Club of Southwest Florida in Naples. "That's something we'd consider because this is an important recruiting area for us as well." The Stephen Ross connection is of no coincidence. According to Ross' bio on the Miami Dolphins' official website, the majority owner of the Dolphins' is a graduate of Michigan. In fact, U-M  rechristened its business school as the Stephen M. Ross School of Business at the University of Michigan in his honor in 2004.  Ross also attended the University of Florida. With that connection in mind, the Gators might be the obvious opponent for the Wolverines. Florida has been criticized in the past over its out-of-conference scheduling. And except for the 2010 and 2011 Alabama and Penn State confrontations, big games between SEC and Big Ten teams have been rare in recent years. (Mention Northwestern-Vanderbilt and wait for the laughter). Barring that, Florida State and Miami would be the next obvious targets for a Wolverine opponent. Miami currently calls Sun-Trust Stadium its home field, however. So that might defeat Brandon's desire for a "neutral-site" game. Florida State has always been open to playing major opponents. So the odds of a  Wolverines-Seminoles showdown might be better than a Wolverines-Gators game.  If U-M can't get one of the "Big Three" Florida schools to play in Sun-Trust Field, either the school will have to talk another major SEC or ACC school into making the trek to Miami, or scrap the idea altogether. South Florida and Central Florida are probably out in the cold when it comes to playing Michigan, unless they schedule it as a trip to The Big House. If Michigan can pull its Sun-Trust Stadium game off, it will bound to be a blockbuster game for college football. With Stephen Ross (and probably a little nudging from ESPN), it could happen sometime in the next few years. (Detroit Free Press, ESPN, St. Petersburg Times) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Will Northwestern's Dan Persa slide into Heisman contention?

Will Northwestern's Dan Persa slide into Heisman contention?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 13, 2011

Northwestern quarterback Dan Persa's 2010 season was cut short when he tore his right Achilles’ tendon in the Wildcats' Nov. 13 victory against Iowa. Still rehabbing from the surgery repared tendon, Persa is learning how to avoid the same situation (or worse) during this upcoming  season. That includes figuring how to slide out of dangerous situations on the field. “Danny will be the first to say that he learned some valuable lessons last year,” NU coach Pat Fitzgerald said Tuesday. “It’s fine for him to move around and scramble, but he has to get down and, at times, do a better job of managing himself. He took some unnecessary hits, especially early.” Persa agreed, saying: “I was definitely told to take care of my body, and I knew people were a lot bigger in this league than (I faced) in high school. But I always thought of myself as a strong kid and never really was injured. Once I started getting hit after the first couple of games I was like: ‘Wow. They weren’t lying.’” Meanwhile, Fitzgerald is already pimping Persa as a Heisman Trophy candidate for next year. "To have a Heisman Trophy candidate come back at quarterback for us is something that gives me a little bit extra sleep at night," Northwestern coach Pat Fitzgerald said Tuesday.  While a QB out of Northwestern as a Heisman Trophy candidate seems mind-boggling, Persa was coming off an notable season before his injury last year. Despite that, he made it onto the coaches' first team All-Big Ten list.  Meanwhile the probable Heisman candidates out of the Big Ten seem to be few and far between.  Michigan's Denard Robinson may be the most likely Heisman Candidate out of the Big Ten, he might struggle a little with new coach Brady Hoke's new system. Nebraska's Taylor Martinez gets a mention or two, but only as a dark horse at the moment. Don't even mention Terelle Pryor at this point. With a few good wins under Persa's belt, more focus could shift to the senior Wildcat QB in the Heisman race as a viable candidate.  At the least, it will improve his 2012 NFL Draft stock, which in the end could be the more desirable outcome. (via The Chicago Tribune, ESPN) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Nick Saban, John Brantley, Logan Gray, and more.

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Nick Saban, John Brantley, Logan Gray, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 12, 2011

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC  news, with the occasional pesky Southern school from another conference.)   Meet the Press. Alabama head football coach Nick Saban responded to reporters' questions on the Brent Calloway recruiting controversy, the battle for the starting quarterback job, and other subjects at a fund raising event in Mobile, AL. (al.com) Replacing Julio. A look at the wide receivers looking at taking over Julio Jones' spot in the Alabama starting offensive line. (al.com) Of course he is. AuburnSports.com's Jeffrey Lee is is accused of making up  his claims about Alabama recruit Brent Calloway being involved in a play-for-pay scandal to turn attention away from brewing issues at Auburm. Of course a 'Bama blogger is making the claims. (Capstone Report) The difficult we do immediately, the impossible may take a little longer.  Chuck Oliver, chimes in about Florida QB John Brantley. The Kang says that Brantley will be an effective QB...someday. (ChuckOliver.net) I'm Still Standing. Tennessee QB Matt Simms is still considered a leader on the team, despite losing his starting job to Tyler Bray last season. (Go Vols Xtra)   LSU progress report. Chadd Scott takes a look at the LSU offense under new offensive coordinator Steve Kragthorpe. (ChuckOliver.net) Too small for their britches?  Looking at Louisiana-Monroe, and wondering if a)The Warhawks are too small for the NCAA and b)If the NCAA is too big. (Team Speed Kills) Kleptomania runs wild. Georgia players were the victims of a locker room break-in that resulted in the theft of over $1,300 worth of electronic devices. (CBS Sports) The blame game. Is Joe Tereshinski to blame for Trinton Sturdivant's ACL injury?  Some critics of the program are blaming the embattled strength and conditioning coach. Here's a defense saying otherwise. (From Hedges to Hardwood) Oh give me a home where the Buffalo roam. Former Georgia quarterback/wide receiver Logan Gray is transferring to Colorado. (ChuckOliver.net) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Purdue fans are not taking to Purdue Pete's Extreme Makeover.

Purdue fans are not taking to Purdue Pete's Extreme Makeover.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 12, 2011

Purdue fans are in an uproar over the plastic surgery given to the school's semi-official mascot Purdue Pete. The hard-hatted symbol of the school which is best known for its engineering and science programs was given a makeover because he reportedly scared children (not to mention bloggers who thought he was really an Auton).   Purdue Pete has gone from this: To this new and, er, "improved" Pete, making his appearance at the spring Black and Gold Game:  Notice Pete's new head, which has gone from a shiny, stoic but fierce look; to a softer, more compassionate Cabbage Patch Kid-looking dome. Along with a helmet that looks more like Jay Garrick's Flash headgear (sans the wings) than a hard hat. Also, look at the arms. They're meant to be muscular, but come off as appearing flabby instead. Fans aren't too crazy about it. "We can't recall much dissatisfaction voiced about the Pete who has roamed the sidelines and the hardwood in recent years. He seemed to fit the bill quite nicely, even as he was ridiculed on websites as being among the worst mascots in intercollegiate sports. Students here would argue otherwise; Pete has been a projection of brute strength, nerve and a solid work ethic." Needless to say, reaction on the Internet is much worse. "The new Pete was publicly shown off and here's what I think: he looks worse in person than he did via photos. His goofy stuffed animal shoes make him look like Mickey Mouse. I always liked Pete wearing black Nikes with a white swoosh as if he might suit up and play for the team. His physique isn't tough-looking and his costume just isn't right. The shiny silver helmet doesn't seem to be shaped like a hard hat and his matching giant belt buckle (like he's about to go to the Neon Cactus) doesn't fit. Plus, he looks like he stole his pants from the lady's department at JC Penney. Whereas the old Pete might have looked intimidating and menacing, the new one looks as if he was born chromosomally-deficient." Hammer and Rails went on to gripe about Purdue Pete's missing hammer. Claiming that his mighty Mjöllnir is missing because "allegedly because it promoted violence." Purdue is already claiming that the Pete that appeared at the Black and Gold Game is merely a prototype version that arrived just before the game, and will undergo some further alterations. Though reports of the new headpiece's place of origin might explain Pete's less-than-stellar appearance. "The new Pete was manufactured in Wisconsin, and might explain why he seems so foreign and fake." "Manufactured in Wisconsin," eh? I smell a conspiracy involving those steenkin' Badgers. Alert Alex Jones to this chicanery. (via Journal & Courier,  Boiled Sports, Hammer and Rails) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Will the Iowa-Nebraska rivarly become... Black-and-Blue Friday? Or worse...Farmageddeon?

Will the Iowa-Nebraska rivarly become... Black-and-Blue Friday? Or worse...Farmageddeon?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 12, 2011

While Iowa is getting used to not facing Wisconsin every year for The Heartland Trophy, and coming to terms with having Purdue as its interdivisional rival, it's also preparing for the coming of Nebraska into the Big Ten as a Legends Division rival. The stakes for this annual face-off to become a huge rivalry are already getting high, with the game currently scheduled for the Friday after Thanksgiving. (Keeping it out of the way of that other huge Big Ten game that weekend between Ohio State and Michigan.) With any potential huge blockbuster game in college football, there come the time where it has to be labeled with a somewhat catchy name. Alabama vs. Auburn is called the Iron Bowl. Oklahoma vs. Oklahoma State is called Bedlam. And Georgia vs. Florida is of course The World's Largest (Censored by Dr. Michael Adams). So what to call Nebraska vs. Iowa? Personally, I've wanted to call it "Black-and-Blue Friday," but the Husker's red color scheme sort of throws a monkey wrench into that idea. Iowa tight end Brad Herman, however, seems to have come up with the best idea so far to dub the rivarly. "What are they calling it, Farmageddon?" Herman said. "It's going to be a fun new matchup. Nebraska is going to bring a lot to the Big Ten as far as football goes."   Herman's not the first to come up with the name. And sadly, that name is already taken by the game between Nebraska's former Big 12 brethren Iowa State vs. Kansas State. And Cyclone fans seem none too happy with the potential for Iowa vs. Nebraska  swiping the name. Mind you, no good idea goes unstolen. See the Atlanta Braves fans swiping the Tomahawk Chomp from Florida St. for that one. So Black-and-Blue Friday still might be in the mix for the final name for the Huskers vs. Hawkeyes annual brawl. What do you think, sirs? (via ESPN) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Big Tentacles: Cameron Heyward on Luke Fickell, Iowa's James Vandenberg, and more.

Big Tentacles: Cameron Heyward on Luke Fickell, Iowa's James Vandenberg, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 12, 2011

(Big Tentacles is the SWRT look at the Big Ten and the schools it not-so-secretly covets.)  I've seen the future and it will be. Former Ohio State defensive tackle  Cameron Heyward believes assistant coach Luke Fickell, who is Jim Tressel's fill-in during his five-game suspension, will eventually succeed Jim Tressel as the Buckeyes' head football coach. (Along the Olentangy) I've seen the future and it works. James Vandenberg will in all probability be Iowa's starting quarterback to start to 2011 season. (ESPN) The first annual Iowa Ladies' Football Academy. No, this isn't a joke. That didn't Black Heart Gold Pants from making a few jokes involving it at Kirk Ferentz's expense, though. (Black Heart Gold Pants) Back Under the Tarnished Dome? Notre Dame is getting hammered for it's handling of the Michael Floyd DUI situation. (Chicago Tribune) Making a name for themselves. While the question of who Penn State's starting quarterback will be in 2011 up in the air,  players at other positions are already making their cases for roles on the team. (PennLive.com) The Incredible Mr. Lippett. Tony Lippett will be doing double duty on the Michigan State offense and defense in 2011. (Detroit Free Press) Hey, it's good to be back home again. Braylon Edwards says that with Brady Hoke as head football coach, "Michigan feels like home again. (Detroit Free Press) Looking for that early Mother's Day or Father's Day gift?  Michigan is selling a couple of sideline clock tables used at Crisler Arend on e-bay. Bidding is currently up to $304.00 dollars.(M Victors) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Two Florida basketball players try to break into car, get slam dunked by the law.

Two Florida basketball players try to break into car, get slam dunked by the law.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on April 11, 2011

With the college basketball season over, basketball players now have more time to study (stop snickering), get ready for next season, and of  course, get in trouble with the law. Two Florida players,  Eric Murphy and Cody Larson, along with  student manager Joshua Abel, seem to have already checked  off that third option of their list.The three were arrested for an alleged attempt at breaking into a vehicle that wasn't theirs.  "St. Augustine police sargent Jason Etheredge said that Larson and Murphy went into Scarlett O'Hara's Bar and Restaurant around 2 a.m. Sunday and claimed to have lost a wallet. Etheredge said Larson and Murphy tried to get close to a female employee who was counting money from the night. Bouncers then told Larson and Murphy to leave. According to Etheredge, the bouncers saw Larson and Murphy trying to breaking into a co-worker's car in a parking lot across the street a few minutes later. Murphy. Larson and Adel tried to flee the scene. Murphy and Adel were tracked down after a short chase. Larson turned himself into police after calling Murphy on his cell phone." That was smart. Real smart. Especially since Larson was already on probation for what's described as "a misdemeanor drug charge for sharing painkillers during his senior year of high school in Sioux Falls, S.D." Florida head men's basketball coach Billy Donovan is sure to be a little unhappy over this one.  What's worse, crimes committed by basketball players during the offseason aren't eligible for the Fulmer Cup. So this entire exercise was for naught.  (via The Gainesville Sun) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

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