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What Passes for Life: USF, Dana White,  Batman, and more

What Passes for Life: USF, Dana White, Batman, and more

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 23, 2010

What's the bigger deal for USF: Winning the Big East and going to a BCS bowl game, or beating Florida, FSU, and/or Miami? It's a trickier question than you think, involving nation recognition and in-state recruiting. (Voodoo Five) Dana White says boxing is doomed. I think they said that about Madonna's career several times over. (Cagewriter) Another new Batman series?  DC Comics announces Batman INC., which spews forth from the mind of Grant Morrison. (The Source) Deadspin repeating sentences in headlines again? Deadspin repeating sentences in headlines again. (Deadspin) Brad Pitt is Moneyball.  Which I guess makes Angelina Jolie The Blind Side. Move over, Sandra Bullock. (SB Nation)

Your Moment of Tebowness: Tebow invited to become The Bachelor?

Your Moment of Tebowness: Tebow invited to become The Bachelor?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 23, 2010

(Your Moment of Tebowness is SWRT's recurring feature on the cultural phenomenon that is His Tebowness. Everyone else is doing it, so why can't I?) Tim Tebow invited to become The Bachelor? Tim Tebow invited to become The Bachelor.  "I talked to Tim Tebow yesterday. I'm really not joking. His brother Robby was there. I asked him in front of God and Country. He hasn't said yes yet, but he did say he would be a better version then Jesse Palmer. I told him, "Wait until you play in the NFL first my friend, because Jesse Palmer was quite the bench warmer." Tim Tebow invited to become The Bachelor.   (via TIMTEBLOG)

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Robbie Caldwell, Derek Dooley, and more UGA tidbits then you can shake a

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Robbie Caldwell, Derek Dooley, and more UGA tidbits then you can shake a

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 23, 2010

The "truth" behind Robbie Caldwell's now-legendary/infamous SEC Media Days session. Was is all done for a free meal at Dreamland? (Rocky Top Talk) Derek Dooley's first SEC Media Days session. And what does the press want to ask His Hairness about? Vince, Barbara, and Lane Kiffin. (Team Speed Kills) The Old Ball Coach's Last Stand? Tony Barnhart wonder how much does Steve Spurrier have left in him. (Mr. College Football)  It's over. The final chapter in the epic four part interview with Paul Johnson. (ACC Sports Journal) Mike Bianchi says "Georgia is the the most overrated program in college football history." One word: Michigan. (Orlando Sentinel) On a related front: Mark Richt is boring. Which is what happens when Richt's been told not to talk about the NCAA investigation of A.J. Green's involvement in Agentgate.  (Team Speed Kills) Quite possibly the dubious achievement to end all dubious achievements. "Georgia’s Drew Butler is the first punter to ever attend SEC Media Days." (Athens Banner-Herald)

Why is Colt McCoy Still Smiling?

Why is Colt McCoy Still Smiling?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 23, 2010

There's Colt McCoy smiling again. What's got him giddy this time around? 1. "I've finally done something Tim Tebow hasn't." 2. "And by the way, Tim. It was real funny how you paid  Jordan Shipley to mention your name in my wedding song. Just remember revenge is a dish best served cold, son. Just wait 'till you tie the knot. (cackles evilly). 3. "Hey, Vince Young: Coach Brown told me he likes me more than you." 4. "Boy, that Summer of Mallett is one funny dude." 5. "Yo, Rick Reilly: I had a little shrimp vindaloo for a midnight snack last night. How about you?" 6. "With LeBron gone, I'm gonna have Cleveland all to myself."  7. "Did anybody else laugh at Robby Caldwell talking about inseminating turkeys as much as I did?" 8. " Yeah It took a little while, but the NCAA finally caught wind of that party in Miami that I had set up." 9. "Hey, Clay Travis: Wanna ask me if I'm still a virgin?" 10.  "It's better to have competed for the BCS Championship and lost, than to win it and have it taken away because of somebody on the team declared ineligible because of improper dealings with agents. Take that, Reggie Bush!"

Florida recruit Chris Martin compared to The Great Khali. Is this a good thing?

Florida recruit Chris Martin compared to The Great Khali. Is this a good thing?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 22, 2010

Alligator Army compared  Chris Martin, an outside linebacker  who just transferred to Florida from California , to the WWE's The Great Khali. This is probably bad news for Martin, since Khali has a large amount of detractors online. For those who are unfamiliar with The Great Khali, this is what he looks like: The Great Khali might look fierce, but his wrestling skills are suspect, and he's seen as more of a joke to many than a threat. In fact wrestling site Online Onslaught used to refer to him as "The [redacted] Khali  (though more recently he's just called "Khali" over there). Honestly, he pretty much sucks as a wrestler. Martin being compared to Khali might sound cool, but only if you know squat about pro wrestling. Actually, the Gators might want to find somebody who reminds them of John Cena. Heck, Cena looks more to be a member of the Gator Nation than Khali ever will. Orange shirt. Blue and orange baseball cap. And to top it all off, jean shorts. Yep, Cena's gotta be a Gator. (via Alligator Army)

What Passes for Life: Mark Cuban, Old Spice Guy

What Passes for Life: Mark Cuban, Old Spice Guy

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 22, 2010

(What Passes for Life is SWRT's collection of sports and non sports related links and hi-jinks.)   Will the Rangers go Cuban? Dallas Mavericks' owner Mark Cuban given approval to bid on Texas Rangers in auction. Welcome to the dawn of Bug Selig's Freudian Nightmare. (Yahoo! Sports) Old Spice Guy hurting sales? The "Old Spice Guy" commercials aren't doing much for sales of Old Spice Red Zone After Hours Body Wash. In fact, sales are down seven percent. Maybe it's time to bring back the Centaur Who's Two Things. (Yahoo! TV) David Eckstein's wife set to debut her very own Star Wars apparel for women (geeks) called Her Universe. There had better be a Princess Leia swimsuit somewhere in this one. (Sports Radio Interviews.com) SHAZAM! Rob Lowe will voice Captain Marvel in the Cartoon Network animated version of  DC Comics' Young Justice, where he'll hang out with Robin, Superboy, Kid Flash, and Miss Martian. Hey, where's Wonder Girl? (TV Guide) UFC 121 to feature Tito Ortiz and Matt Hamill.  Ortiz had better hope Hammil's Staph Infection is cured by then. Ewwww! (SB Nation)

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Robbie Caldwell, NCAA investigation, Mark Richt on Bobby Bowden and more

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Robbie Caldwell, NCAA investigation, Mark Richt on Bobby Bowden and more

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 22, 2010

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC and ACC news)   Robbie Caldwell steals SEC Media Days.  Reflections on working on a turkey farm inseminating turkeys have got to make Gamecock fans nervous. On the other hand, it might put him in line to replace Frank Beamer at Virginia Tech someday. (EDSBS) A.J. Green was not at that party in Miami with that agent. Because T. Kyle King said so. (Dawg Sports)  The Twitter Factor. A look at how Twitter set off the NCAA investigation into the improper meetings between agents and players at UNC and other schools. As of now, the Twitter accounts of UNC players are quiet. Too quiet. (Carolina March) Mark Richt on the way Bobby Bowden was forced to retire at FSU. He didn't like it, according to The Orlando Sentinel's Mike Bianchi. (Open Mike) Tomahawk Nation's Twiter reaction to Richt's comments on Bowden: "ATTN Mark Richt: STFU about Bowden. FSU fans were tired of their program being run like a history museum. Story is so 2009." (Tomahawk Nation Twitter)  Paul Johnson: The Epic Interview. It continues with Part Three with Johnson's  high school footballs days, and how he became a coach. (ACC Sports.com) Tigers look at other Tigers. Clemson blog Shakin' the Southland takes a look at the offense of September 10 foe Auburn and its offensive coordinator, Gus Malzhan. As blogger DrB notes, Malzhan will probably be head coach at another program sooner than later. (Shakin' the Southland)  Ryan Mallett's "Family Arm." That's what he calls it. I'm more curious what he calls his banged up foot? "Stumpy," perhaps? (EDSBS)

The latest on the growing SEC/ACC football  pimps agents investigation.

The latest on the growing SEC/ACC football pimps agents investigation.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 22, 2010

The NCAA probe at UNC is "agent related." - Rivals.com "No One Safe from  NCAA Scrutiny" - (Rivals.com) Media not allowed to ask Mark Richt about allegations of A.J. Green having contact with pimp agent at Miami party, and vice-versa. (SB Nation) Tony Barnhart's take. "The answer is to give the legitimate agents—and there are so many good ones out there—GREATER access and to give the student-athlete with pro potential a clearly defined road map on how to get there and also get the most out of his college experience." (Mr. College Football) A pimp takes umbrage at Nick Saban's comparison of agents to "pimps". (EDSBS)

Is playing Boise State a no-win situation for Virginia Tech?

Is playing Boise State a no-win situation for Virginia Tech?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 22, 2010

Gobbler Country, a Virginia Tech blog, has asked the question "Is Playing Boise State Still a Lose-Lose Proposition?" The answer is "yes," probably in more ways than one. Boise State, being from a non-BCS conference which it continually dominates, never really gets the kind of respect it deserves when it comes to competition. Gobbler Country certainly has a point when it comes to the perception the Broncos get because of this. "If a team from a BCS conference had gone 14-0 the season before and only lost one starter, everyone would vote them the preseason No. 1. But because Boise plays in the WAC there are still skeptics out there and that's why I wonder what the reaction would be if Virginia Tech were to win this game. Would the Hokies be praised for beating a Top 5 team or would the public just consider Boise overrated and exposed?"Virginia Tech has a bigger problem on its hands with perception than it thinks. For several years now, Boise State has been the team that the anti-BCS crowd has put their support  behind (for the most part). Going into this game, Virginia Tech can be seen as the villain,  or at least the team that has the backing of the pro-BCS (i.e. "the bad guys") crowd. If the Hokies lose, they look bad because they lost to a non-BCS team with a weak conference schedule. If they win, they look bad because they probably ended this year's chance of a non-BCS team finally busting the BCS, which a lot of fans want to see happen. Virginia Tech is pretty much wearing the black hat in the game against Boise State, at least when it comes to the anti-BCS crowd. While the Hokies may be favored by the pro-BCS faction, that one is seen by many as standing in the way of a playoff system and a "true" National Champion. While the Hokies could win this game against the Broncos, it could possibly end up wearing the black hat for the rest of the season. (via Gobbler Country)

Derek Dooley's computer Playmobil avatar looks nothing like His Hairness

Derek Dooley's computer Playmobil avatar looks nothing like His Hairness

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 22, 2010

The genius behind "The Lane Kiffin Show" on YouTube has come back with the Derek Dooley version, conviently called "The Derek Dooley Show." Subject for the first episode? You guessed it...the Vol Brawl. The big problem with this is that the Derek Dooley Playmobil avatar looks nothing like His Hairness. Well okay, the hair is pretty close, but not close enough. And with those glasses, Playmobil Dooley looks more like a generic banker. Also, since when did Andre Lott sport a British accent. It's not too bad for a start, but it needs a lot a work.

Shirts Without Random Triangles: LeBron Falcon Punches Cleveland (or worse)

Shirts Without Random Triangles: LeBron Falcon Punches Cleveland (or worse)

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 21, 2010

Obviously Lebron James' "Decision" to bolt for Miami has resulted in more t-shirt ideas than could possibly be featured here. But here's one of the more interesting ones from I Love the Hype. Honestly, I'm not quite sure if LeBron is going for the  Falcon Punch, or trying to rip the heart out of the poor puppy. Mind you, the latter might be too Michael Vick-is. But Cleveland hath no fury like a fan spurned, and everything's on the table when wrath gets in the way of good taste or common sense. (via First Cuts)

Pimpin' with Nick Saban

Pimpin' with Nick Saban

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 21, 2010

Oh, why not?

Your Moment of Tebowness: What the regular version of Tebow's Nike shoe looks like

Your Moment of Tebowness: What the regular version of Tebow's Nike shoe looks like

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 21, 2010

(Your Moment of Tebowness is SWRT's recurring feature on the cultural phenomenon that is His Tebowness. Everyone else is doing it, so why can't I?)   In case you missed it in last week's issue of Sports Illustrated, here's the Nike print ad for the regular version of the Nike Trainer 1.2, the shoe Tim Tebow is endorsing for Nike. (via Only Gators Get Out Alive)

Pimpin' with Mark Richt

Pimpin' with Mark Richt

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 21, 2010

Need carpet? Mark Richt and his wife Katharyn "The Watergirl" Richt can point you where to go.

Derek Dooley joins past Tennessee coaches on Vols' home game tickets

Derek Dooley joins past Tennessee coaches on Vols' home game tickets

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 21, 2010

Derek Dooley may not have his image immortalized  upon the edifice of  the refurbished Neyland Stadium next to that of General Robert Neyland yet, but he does join the General on the tickets to this season's home games for Tennessee. His Hairness and the General join five other past Tennessee coaches to be honored on the Vols'  2010 home game tickets. Dooley's comes first, for the opener  against Tennessee-Martin on September 4. Other coaches honored on the tickets include Johnny Majors, Bill Battle, and Phillp Fulmer, accompanied by one of General Neyland's maxims. Fulmer, by the way, appears on the ticket for the home game against Alabama (Insert your own comment here). And no, genius, Lane Kiffin didn't get his face on a ticket. (Go Vols Xtra)

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