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Cupid Wears Jean Shorts? Tim Tebow, the Heisman, and a marriage proposal

Cupid Wears Jean Shorts? Tim Tebow, the Heisman, and a marriage proposal

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 30, 2010

Here's a new one for the annals of embarrassing your true love into accepting your marriage proposal: Ask her at a Tim Tebow autograph signing:The lucky couple, by the way, are named on YouTube as Ian Lis and Sarah Springer. One has to wonder if Ms. Springer isn't half disappointed that Timmy wasn't the one asking her to marry him. Can't wait to see what Deadspin's semi-sacrilegious "Tim Tebow Messiah Watch" has to say about this.(via Dr. Saturday, The Huffington Post, Deadspin)

Sing along with Bill Stewart. Or: I'll take

Sing along with Bill Stewart. Or: I'll take "Places I don't want to find my school's head football c

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 29, 2010

Need a reason to root against West Virginia in the Final Four? Yeah, with the Mountaineers playing Duke that might be a little hard to do. This clip of WVU football coach Bill Stewart and a bunch of drunks in Myrtle Beach, SC might change your mind.To be perfectly honest there's nothing really wrong with "Take Me Home, Country Roads." If were West Virginia's official state song, it would probably rank high on the list of "Best State Songs." Though "Georgia On My Mind" still beats all other state songs hands down.(via EDSBS)

Ryan Newman, conspiracy spank

Ryan Newman, conspiracy spank

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 29, 2010

As you can tell from the strikeout in the headline, NASCAR driver Ryan Newman has lost his place on the Ryan list, where winners and heroes like Nolan Ryan, Matt Ryan, Ryan Braun, Ryan Conklin, etc., take their rightful place. Sadly, Newman has lost his place for being a total goober. In an interview, Newman claimed that the Apollo 11 Moon landing was faked."I'm pretty sure (the original moon landing) was fake. I watched the documentary on it, and it's pretty easy to believe. The flag was standing straight out when there's no wind up there. When they step on the surface, there should have been a big cloud because there's no atmosphere."Sadly, Newman is a graduate of Purdue. I think he must have been asleep when that was mentioned in history or something. That or his head is as empty as Purdue Pete's mascot head when not being worn.(via From the Marbles, News & Record)

Bob Ryan vs. Dr. Evil  Michael Adams

Bob Ryan vs. Dr. Evil Michael Adams

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 29, 2010

You may have noticed a little bit of a negative feeling towards UGA president Dr. Evil Michael Adams. Well those aren't unique because quite a few members of the Bulldog Nation don't like Dr. Evil Adams. This goes to his handling of events such as forcing Vince Dooley out as UGA AD, and the various scandals involving Jim Harrick and the UGA basketball team. And problems in the athletic department are just the tip of the iceberg. Despite this, Dr. Evil Adams is still considered as a prime candidate to replace the late Miles Brand as president of the NCCA.Bob Ryan of the Boston Globe thinks otherwise. He wrote a column relating various scandals, athletic and non-athletic, that have surrounded Adams' tenure as UGA president. This includes accusations for financial impropriety, and and being referred to as an “Imperial CEO.’’Ryan doesn't feel that makes Adams a good candidate for the NCAA presidency. Then again, considering how toothless and profit-minded the NCAA has become, he might be perfect for the job. And UGA supporters wouldn't mind any excuse for him t0 be an ex-president.(via Boston Globe, Athens Banner-Herald, CBS Sports.com)

What if the Final Four were the Fantastic Four?

What if the Final Four were the Fantastic Four?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 29, 2010

Duke. Michigan State. Butler. West Virginia. They are the 2010 Final Four.But...What if instead of the Final Four, these four teams were the personifications of Stan ("The Man") Lee and Jack ("King") Kirby's greatest creation...The Fantastic Four?Duke as...Mister FantasticIt's easy to see Mike Krzyzewski in the role of Reed Richards, the analytical leader of the FF. If he acts like he's smarter than anybody else in the room, it's because he is. Maybe Mr. Fantastic brains overshadow his not-to-be-taken lightly stretching powers. But in many ways that's how Duke is in real life, with Coach K's coaching skills overshadowing his teams playing skills at times.Michigan State as...The ThingIf there's a first rule in March Madness bracketology it has to be "Don't bet against the Izzo." Many have and their brackets look like Ben Grimm smashed right through them. The Thing can sometimes get overlooked with powerhouses like the Hulk, Thor, and Iron Man running around. In the same way Michigan State can mistakenly be written off in a field than includes Kansas, Kentucky, and Syracuse. That's always a huge mistake. Tom Izzo can rally the troops just like Ben Grimm can rally the FF with his battle cry "IT'S CLOBBERING TIME!" (Yes, that had to be in all capitals.) The Thing never gives up, and he's always ready to come after you with both fists ready to fight. Butler as...The Human TorchAh, Johnny Storm. The young hotshot who blazes a trail of glory. Okay, The Human Torch might not seem the underdog that Butler is to you, but have you ever taken a look at Johnny Storm's love life? Crystal, his first girlfriend, dumped him for the Magneto's kid Quicksilver (though they didn't know that at the time and...oh I digress too much). Then his next steady girl, Frankie Raye, dumped him for planet eating Galactus, of all people. Then he finally got lucks and married Alicia Masters, the Thing's ex-girlfriend. Only it turned out she was really a shape changing Skrull and...well, you get the picture. But as you can see the Torch does have a bit of underdog streak in him. And like the Torch, Butler can very soon find out what happens when you "Flame On!" too soon.West Virginia as...The Invisible WomanWell, somebody had to be Sue Storm Richards. I guess it sucks being West Virginia this time. But seriously, like the Invisible Woman (as she's been called since 1985. Use "The Invisible Girl" at a fanboy and see what happens) West Virginia can be taken lightly a lot of the time. Whereas the Invisible Woman's power to turn herself invisible (duh!) can seem underwhelming at times, her ability to generate force fields can sometimes be as formidable as any of the other powers of the FF. So too is West Virginia's defense, which was able to hold back even Kentucky. Doctor Doom learned about the Invisible Woman the hard way too.Imagine what the Fantastic Four would be like on the basketball court. Imagine what the Final Four could do combined against the likes of Doctor Doom or the Mole Man. The imagination just quivers at the thought.

Josh McDaniels under the microscope

Josh McDaniels under the microscope

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 28, 2010

While taking a look back at the first year of Josh McDaniels reign as the Denver Broncos' drill sergeant head coach, The Denver Post dropped this little gem about McDaniels' relationship with Patriots' QB Tom Brady during the 2005 season. This was when McDaniels became the Patriots' quarterback coach (though in reality he was pretty much the offensive coordinator) :So what happened in McDaniels' first season of coaching Brady, the league's best quarterback? The two went three weeks without speaking to each other. Brady went on to have a Pro Bowl season, and the Patriots made the playoffs. And, two years later, McDaniels, by then officially promoted to offensive coordinator, helped Brady set an NFL record with 50 touchdown passes in a season. Clearly, McDaniels and Brady got past their spat.The Post brought the subject up as an example of a problem with getting well with others that pretty much became to identify McDaniels first year as Bronco's coach. Problems with Jay Cutler (who was traded for Kyle Orton) and Brandon Marshall in the offseason were briefly overshadowed by a quick 6-0 start at the start of the 2009 season, but then went 2-8 the rest of the year.While this could be written off as the pitfalls of a first year head coach. But with a probably trade of Marshall, and a brewing quarterback controversey with Orton and Brady Quinn, season two of the McDaniels regime (via PFT, Denver Post)

Saturday Sundry Links

Saturday Sundry Links

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 27, 2010

A few sundry links to help you get through the day.Lane Kiffin "Sexiest Woman Alive Madness" update - Lane is still ahead of Natalie Gulbis. (Esquire)Terence Moore has a thinking problem about Urban Meyer...again. - More Terence Being Terence. (Fanhouse)Dawg Sports' College Football Hall of Fame Ballot. - Former Dawgs Jake Scott, Matt Stinchcomb, and Scott Woerner make his ballot. As does Deion Sanders, Lawrence Taylor, and Pat Tillman, among others. No Gators though, for some reason. (Dawg Sports)ABC's Road to March Madness profiles Swiperboy. - From YouTube to the Elite Eight.Jason Heyward will wear #22 on his Braves's jersey. - Heyward's number is 22. Matt Ryan wears #2 on his jersey. Coincidence? (Atlanta Journal-Constitution)Joe Buck Live is an ex-television program. - Somewhere, Artie Lange is laughing demonically. (Warming Glow)

The Internet demands Gus Johnson in the booth for SEC Football

The Internet demands Gus Johnson in the booth for SEC Football

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 26, 2010

Well okay, so far it's just And the Valley Shook! and EDSBS that I know of. But heck, I know a bandwagon to jump on then I see it. And Gus Johnson in the announcer's booth would be pure awesomeness.Johnson may be the breakout star of this year's tournament. Even more so than anybody on the St. Mary's or Northern Iowa rosters. Johnson has inspired a soundboard created in his honor.Covering college football won't be too much of an adjustment for Johnson. He's covered NFL game for CBS, and is known for his call last year of Brandon Stokley's Week 1 touchdown reception in Denver's victory over Cincinnati. So covering a college football game shouldn't be a stretch.Need more proof? Take a gander at this.And so in honor of this, SWRT has created a Facebook group to further this movement to pair up the SEC to the excitement that is Gus Johnson.Just imagine Gus Johnson calling Alabama versus Tennessee. Or Georgia versus Florida in the World's Largest (Redacted by the orders of Dr. Evil Michael Adams). Rise and Fire indeed.(via EDSBS, And the Valley Shook!)

The Boston Red Sox:

The Boston Red Sox: "What, Me Worry?"

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 26, 2010

This was Dustin Pedroia doing his best Alfred E. Newman Thursday, after x-rays on his left wrist showed no damage from where he sprained it in a Tuesday spring practice game against the Minnesota Twins. Pedroia may be all smiles, but that's not keeping Red Sox fans from slipping back into their pre-1994 ways. Over the Monster presents to the public "The Paranoid's Guide to the Red Sox, Part I: Riverdancing with Wolves." The title alone is worth the going to the trouble of linking up to it. First up is a look at the flaws in the pitching of Jonathan Papelbon, including the dependence on the fastball, and lack of success with secondary pitches. This and this ominous warning:When you've got a 1-pitch pitcher with a lot of wear on his arm, and a big free agent contract on the horizon, the last thing you expect is a big season. In 2010, the only thing Jonathan Papelbon will be saving is himself... for the Yankees.Be afraid, Boston, be very afraid. (via ESPN, Over the Monster)

Five for Five Links

Five for Five Links

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 25, 2010

Mark Richt lashed out at reporter over quotes from UGA VIII - Let the Urban Meyer meltdown parodies begin! (Dawg Sports)LSU considers on campus micro-brewery - An official one that is. Wouldn't shock me one bit if there weren't amateur versions of Hawkeye and B.J.'s still in the dorms already. (Dr. Saturday)Paul Hewitt not jumping at St. John's, staying at Georgia Tech - At least one of those is due to a huge buyout clause. (Atlanta Journal-Constitution)The International Bowl is toast. - Wait, there was a bowl game in Toronto? Sadly, bowl games are like the heads of the hydra. Cut one off and two more grow grow in its place. (Buster Sports)It's a bird! It's a plane! It's...LAME! - This Dwight Howard "This is SportsCenter" commercial.If Hannah Storm is Lois Lane, does this make Brian Kenny Jimmy Olsen?

Auburn taps Barbee as new mens' basketball coach.

Auburn taps Barbee as new mens' basketball coach.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 25, 2010

Okay, it's not that Barbie. But in all seriousness Auburn has hired UTEP's Tony Barbee to be the Tigers' new mens' basketball coach. No word yet if Ken or Skipper will be joining him on the coaching staff.(via Atlanta Journal-Constitution)

Urban Meyer goes postal at reporter after Tebow comments

Urban Meyer goes postal at reporter after Tebow comments

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 25, 2010

(Cue the Carolina Liar)Urban Meyer went a little postal at Orlando Sentinel reporter Jeremy Fowler Wednesday. Fowler had reported on comments by Florida wide receiver (for now) Deonte Thompson comparing new Gator QB John Brantley to a certain former Florida QB who just recently graduated."New quarterback John Brantley is what Thompson calls a “pure passer,” which makes him happy. The two have connected on thousands of passes the last three years in practice, Thompson said. “You never know with Tim,” Thompson said. “You can bolt, you think he’s running but he’ll come up and pass it to you. You just have to be ready at all times. With Brantley, everything’s with rhythm, time. You know what I mean, a real quarterback.”Meyer confronted Fowler on Wednesday about the comments. As you can see, He wasn't amused.In case you missed it, Meyer said “If that was my son, we’d be going at it right now.” He was talking about Fowler there, but the fact the comments were about Tebow probably made the situation even worse. In fact, it could be argued that subconsciously it really was Tebow that Meyer was referring to in that manner. Meyer also loved Tebow like Timmy was his own child. It just seems that love was more in the way John Huston loved Faye Dunnaway in Chinatown as time goes on. (And yes, that just being metaphorical.)(via Deadspin, Orlando Sentinel)

Forget Chris Evans. Ricky Stanzi is the

Forget Chris Evans. Ricky Stanzi is the "REAL" Captain America

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 24, 2010

Chris Evans has accepted Marvel's offer to play Captain America in The First Avenger: Captain America, scheduled for a 2011 release. However, Marvel's choice may have picked the wrong man for the job. Black Heart Gold Pants make a good case for Iowa QB Ricky Stanzi as the real Star-Spangled Avenger.The blog gives us a three part tale that takes our hero from the heart of Middle America to deepest darkest North Korea to rescue Iowa obsessed South Korean pop group Girls' Generation from his jealous teammate Paki O'Meara. (Don't ask. South Korea's apparently obsessed with the Iowa Hawkeyes. I blame Alan Alda.) Read Part one here. And follow it up with Part Two, Part Three, and Part Four.(Wait, did I say this was three parts? Silly me. I have become The Spanish Inquisition. If you've got a problem with that, I'll strap you to the Comfy Chair.)(via KITV, Black Heart Gold Pants)

Swiperboy's got a Sweep 16 rap.

Swiperboy's got a Sweep 16 rap.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 24, 2010

Just in time for the Sweet 16, Renaldo "Swiperboy" Woolridge is back with a rap on guess what? Tennessee's trip to the Sweet 16. Creatively titled "Baller Vol Sweet 16," Swiperboy dropped this one on YouTube a couple of days ago.He apparently has a mix tape out on April 4 also. I'm sure that it'll be one Bruce Pearl's iPod quicker than a UT coed on his son, Steven Pearl's lap.I guess it is great to be a Tennessee Vol.Oh crud...did I just use the words "Bruce Pearl" and "rap" in the same sentence?Remind me not to make that mistake again.(via Deadspin, The Big Lead)

Your gratuitous

Your gratuitous "Sexy" Lane Kiffin update

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 24, 2010

It may be a case of too little, too late, but Natalie Gulbis has crept up a little on Lane Kiffin in Esquire's "Sexiest Woman Alive Madness" Tournament. But not by much. Kiffin still leads 56%-44%, so that may be too much ground for Gulbis to make up.Just for future reference, Danica Patrick is shaping up to be Kiffin's competition in the second round of the tournament. She's currently ahead of Erin Andrews 54%-46%.

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