Saturday, November 22, 2014 • Morning Edition • "Sometimes true. Always authentic."
[BLEEP] YOU, MASCOT:Superfrog

[BLEEP] YOU, MASCOT:Superfrog

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 10, 2009

Hi, Superfrog. You're the mascot of TCU, this year's BCS buster darling that really isn't going to bust anything. Not even with those horns on your arms and legs. You're nest hope for the BCS championship is for Florida and Alabama to be abducted by giant cave spiders during the SEC Championship. I don't see that happening.Superfrog? I don't think so. Sorry, I'm not seeing any frog here. Not even a horned frog. I'd say you're more like a kiddie-fide version of Doomsday, the monster that "killed" Superman (he got better).I'll bet that Superfrog doesn't get a lot of dates. You think girls are going to want to make out with a guy with spikes on his arms and legs? Nah, I didn't think so. And seriously, the shimmel shirt doesn't help your chances there, either. Wearing that as everyday fashion went out in 1983. Going for the retro-tool look there, Superfrog?You're more lame than impressive there, Superfrog. In a sea of goofy mascots, you're more the flotsam or jetsam.(apologies as usual to Matthew Gasteier)

"Mr. College Footbal's" latest BCS nightmare projection

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 10, 2009

"Mr. College Football" Tony Barnhart has his latest BCS Bowl projections up on ajc.com. It you're looking for exciting football match-ups, you may have to go somewhere else. Like Madden 2010.Barnhart's projections:BCS "Championship": Alabama vs. Texas.Orange Bowl: Georgia Tech vs. IowaFiesta Bowl: USC vs. TCUSugar Bowl: Florida vs. CincinnatiRose Bowl: Ohio State vs. OregonThe sound you hear coming out of Bristol is ESPN execs banging their head against walls.(via ajc.com)

It's 1957 all over again at North Carolina

It's 1957 all over again at North Carolina

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 10, 2009

North Carolina opened up the 2009-2010 basketball season in style by beating Isiah Thomas and Florida International University 88-72. In the style of the 1957 Tar Heels, that is.As part of celebrating 100 years of Tar Heel basketball, North Carolina donned uniforms commemorating national championship teams of the past. They started out with honoring the 1957 championship team, which featured shorts with a red waistband and red trim on the neckline.The problem with the unis is the red waistband made it looked like the Heels' collective boxers were showing. Oh the other hand, the reminded me of Ferro Lad of the Legion of Super-HeroesI wonder if this makes Duke the Sun Eater? The Dookies probably hope so.(via Rivals.com)

ESPN blows NFL Today reunion

ESPN blows NFL Today reunion

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 10, 2009

ESPN showed on the Nov. 9 edition of the Monday Night Countdown program why it's the Worldwide Leader in Sports Lameness. To promote Tuesday night's 30 for 30: The Legend of Jimmy the Greek, ESPN reunited the old CBS The NFL Today team of Brent Musburger, Phyllis George, and Irv Cross. What could have been a really cool segment turned into The Brady Bunch Movie, with the trio still acting like it 1985 (No sign of Bruce Springsteen or Madonna, though. Or Bowling for Soup, for that matter...thank goodness!). Tom Jackson and Chris Berman didn't help things much.If The NFL Today crew had just been brought on to talk about old times or reminisced about Jimmy the Greek or put into perspective how covering the NFL had changed since the 1980, it would have been a great segment. The chances of seeing these three together in one place on TV don't come around ofter. ESPN just plain blew it.The NFL Today reunion could have been a great segment. Getting cutesy ruined a really cool moment. It's another case of over-thinking at ESPN, or just plain non-thinking.

Yahoo! Spoils my viewing pleasure

Yahoo! Spoils my viewing pleasure

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 10, 2009

I was getting psyched to see the final table of the World Series of Poker on ESPN tonight, but Yahoo! has to go and spoil it for me. In it's infinite wisdom Yahoo! announced the winner of the WSOP in the headlines section of it's homepage, even thought it won't be televised until tonight at 9:00 PM on ESPN. Nice job there. I', sure ESPN is going to enjoy the loss of viewership because of this reveal. I know I'm less enthused of watching something I already know the outcome of.

Notre Dame Hubris Watch

Notre Dame Hubris Watch

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 9, 2009

Even before Navy beat Notre Dame for the second time in three years that calls for Charlie Weis' head coaching job came in. There was that goober at the start of the year who wasted paid money for that billboard mocking Weis' record if you recall. To be honest, its not looking too good for Weis keeping his job actually.But before deciding to hand Weis his walking papers, those in South Bend may want to take a look up north to Ann Arbor, Michigan, to see how firing Lloyd Carr has worked out. After a dance with Les Miles, the Wolverines had to settle with Rich Rodriguez. In paper hiring a coach on the rise who had taken West Virginia to new heights in the BCS era. Two years in, the program is nowhere near a Rose Bowl, and maybe nowhere near am Outback Bowl, either.In fact, Michigan could possibly be in competition with Notre Dame for replacing their head coach. The best guess is that Michigan will take another chance at Miles. Notre Dame might be looking at Miles too, for that matter. The wish list for both school probably would have a few names duplicated on each list.

Sammy Sosa outlook is a little...brighter?

Sammy Sosa outlook is a little...brighter?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 8, 2009

NBC Washington is reporting that former baseball roid freak star Sammy Sosa has undergone a radical transformation. He's become...well, see for yourself:From the article:"Recent photos snapped of the former Chicago Cubs slugger show a shocking transformation: his skin is turning white -- stark white. In addition, he appears to be wearing green contact lenses, which is no big deal compared with the impossible-to-miss pigmentation change."(Insert Michael Jackson joke here. And no, not that one!)(Thanks to Royal Nonesuch at The Outhouse for pointing this NBC Washington story out.)

It had to happen: The Manning Meter

It had to happen: The Manning Meter

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 8, 2009

Want to keep track of Peyton Manning's march to the top of the NFL record books? The Indianapolis Star's website has a Manning Meter that marks 18 Chatterbox Left's place on the list of touchdowns, completions, passing yards and wins among the NFL's best. It also gives projections when Manning is expected to pass each quarterback. All except one, that is. It seems the leader in all four categories is a certain Cute Purple Dinosaur. And there's no telling when he's going to retire for good.(via The Indianapolis Star)

Rich Rodriguez Hubris Watch: Purdue 38, Michigan 36

Rich Rodriguez Hubris Watch: Purdue 38, Michigan 36

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 7, 2009

I'm seriously wondering if Rich Rodriguez is going to be back at Michigan next year. A few weeks ago I would've said the chances were above 75% at minimum that he'd be coaching the Wolverines for a third season. Now I'm not so sure.Purdue beat the Wolverines today 38-36. It was the first time since 1966 that the Boilermakers beat Michigan in the Big House. That's forty-three years ago. Barack Obama was five years old. The Monkees had the number one song with "Last Train to Clarksville." Stan Lee and Jack Kirby were hitting their stride on Fantastic Four. Detroit still mattered. That long ago.Things should be looking up for Michigan. Tate Forcier looks like he has what it takes to be a great quarterback, in college and the pros. The team's record has improved from last year's 3-9 disaster. But today was a setback. Even though the game was close, all the wind's been kicked out of Michigan's sails. The chances of a bowl game are slowly fading away. And possible NCAA sanctions over "practice-gate" aren't out of the question.As so might be Rich-Rod's chances of a third season as Michigan coach. Rodriguez wasn't Michigan's first choice as head coach. That was Les Miles. He bowed out in the midst of an BCS championship run in 2007. For some reason I picture Les Miles ruminating over Saturday's loss to Alabama while updating his resume, making sure there are no embarrassing George O'Leary-esque embellishments.In theory Rodriguez should get another shot at a winning season. But a good chance of losses against Wisconsin and Ohio State might be enough for some Michigan supporters. It might just be the right time to stop the bleeding.

Emelianenko delivers, Strikeforce doesn't

Emelianenko delivers, Strikeforce doesn't

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 8, 2009

Fedor Emelianenko looked impressive in his victory over Brett Rogers Saturday night. A convincing second round knockout was as good of an argument as any that he is the best fighter in the world. The event as a whole? Not so much.Emelianenko and Rogers gave the crowd what they wanted. A good, action packed fight ending in Emelianenko's knockout punch to Rogers in the second round. Rogers managed a good fight on the losing side, even blooding Emelianenko's nose early in the first round. Still, Emelianenko prevailed in the end. In all it was a good fight.One word of advice to Emelianenko: learn some English. It will help him out a whole lot attracting a following in this country. Or at least get a better looking interpreter.The rest of the Stroikeforce card was kind of lackluster, even comical. Jake Sheilds' defeat of Jason "Mayhem" Miller was kind of a letdown. It was five rounds of nothing to write home about. Miller made things worse with a not-ready-for-prime-time entrance complete with cheesy dancers and pyrotechnics. Not the kind of thing you see at a UFC fight (at least not since Dana White's been around).And there lies the big problem. The Strikeforce event seemed a little underwhelming. UFC fights have a big-deal feel to them. They're on par with blockbuster boxing events, even the minor cards. This card fell more as third rate as the stuff I see on the Fight Zone broadcasts on SportSouth or FOX Sports South or whichever non-ESPN wannabe it's on. The pyrotechnics gave it a feel closer to a cheesy knockoff of old school WCW Nitro in its last days.While Emelianenko-Rogers delivered, the card as a whole was a completely different story. CBS really needs to work on the production values before the next telecast. If there is one.

I'm blind! I'm deaf! I wanna be an SEC Ref!

I'm blind! I'm deaf! I wanna be an SEC Ref!

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 7, 2009

If I was an insensitive politically incorrect kind of guy, I'd say this who the SEC had in the replay booth for Alabama's win against LSU:But I'm not, so I won't.

Psycho T's

Psycho T's "Wow" NBA debut

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 7, 2009

Tyler Hansbrough, former North Carolina Tar Heel superstar, finder of lost dogs, and overexuberant car spokesman, scored 13 points in his NBA debut as an Indiana Pacer.All there is to say about it is..."WOW!"(via The Sporting Blog, journalgazette.net )

Boise St says they'll play anybody. But does anybody want to play them?

Boise St says they'll play anybody. But does anybody want to play them?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 7, 2009

Yahoo! Sports' Dan Wetzel reports Boise State is having trouble finding a big school to play on it's 2011 schedule. (They have Oregon St. and Virginia Tech on the schedule for 2010). Boise saying they'll go anywhere to play. So far no takers.It sounds like the Boise St. PR campaign is in full effect. Painting the Broncos as a team the big boys are too scared to play sure sounds like a classic PR move. Besides that, it's probably true. It's more evidence that Obama should listen to Senator Orrin Hatch and have the Justice Department check out the legality of the BCS. It sounds more and more like a monopoly every day.

Breeder's Cup Saturday

Breeder's Cup Saturday

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 7, 2009

(Yep, it's pretty much an excuse to post this one up again...)

Could LeBron handle being Number Three (or worse) in New York?

Could LeBron handle being Number Three (or worse) in New York?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 6, 2009

LeBron James, the Cleveland man who made a Yankee cap more famous than either a Yankee or Jay-Z could, skipped out on the Yankees 27th World Series Victory Parade Friday. Too bad. It probably could have helped him make that decision everybody wants him to make: stay with the Cavs, or become a Knick?Seeing the floats carrying the Yanks through the "Canyon of Heroes" of Manhattan while being showered with ticker tape and other paper products might have given LeBron a major epiphany that he probably needs to know before he makes his decision: If he goes to New York, he in all probability will never be number one there.Basketball may be the sport of the streets in NYC, but baseball is king nevertheless. And whatever Yankee is the star player on the team will be the number one athlete in the city barring a major shift in fortunes. Right now, don't expect that to happen anytime soon.When Patrick Ewing was taking the Knicks to the playoffs in the 90's, the Yankees were awakening from their fifteen or so odd slumber of mediocrity. Even before that time, baseball ruled the headlines. The manager merry-go-round stole headlines from other sports and the chaos surrounding George Steinbrenner knew no bounds.If LeBron bolted for the Knicks ,or even (perish the thought!) the Nets, he would have to be content with being no better than Number Three in NYC, behind Jeter and A*Rod. And if Eli Manning got the Giants back to the Super Bowl, he could possible drop to Number Four. Or lower, depending on what other Yankee takes New York's fancy.Could LeBron James handle not being the center of attention? It arguably has it's benefits. But if the argument for leaving Cleveland for New York is better visibility then he might be in for a shock. New York pays more attention to the Yankees, and arguably, so does America.(via Ball Don't Lie)

The Outhouse is not responsible for any butthurt incurred by reading this website. All original content copyright the author. Banner by Ali Jaffery - he's available for commission!