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Your gratuitous

Your gratuitous "Sexy" Lane Kiffin update

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 24, 2010

It may be a case of too little, too late, but Natalie Gulbis has crept up a little on Lane Kiffin in Esquire's "Sexiest Woman Alive Madness" Tournament. But not by much. Kiffin still leads 56%-44%, so that may be too much ground for Gulbis to make up.Just for future reference, Danica Patrick is shaping up to be Kiffin's competition in the second round of the tournament. She's currently ahead of Erin Andrews 54%-46%.

Yankee and Red Sox players in a commercial ?  Are cats and dogs living together next?

Yankee and Red Sox players in a commercial ? Are cats and dogs living together next?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 23, 2010

It's an act that is probably only permissible due to the involvement of ESPN. Boston Red Sox pitcher Clay Buchholz and Yankee outfielder Nick Swisher have done a commercial promoting the WWL's baseball schedule. But at least there are some things you can't get a Yankee to do.I hope Swisher's refusal to sing "Sweet Caroline" is more than just a gag in a commercial. It should be a part of every Yankee's contract where singing that is banned.The other guy in the clip is Adam Scott, who you might know from either a)the movie Step Brothers, or b)the USA series Party Down, though I seriously doubt the later, since I never even heard of it.(via, Boston Dirt Dogs, imdb)

More reasons to hate Duke: Dad names son after Christian Laettner

More reasons to hate Duke: Dad names son after Christian Laettner

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 23, 2010

It's one of those things that could only happen during March Madness. A couple in North Carolina has named their son Laettner Keanu Locklear. The father, Chad Locklear, obviously a huge Duke fan. So he picked the one name above all others that would annoy all the Tar Heel fans he knows. You can include his wife, April Locklear among that group. She's the one that came up with the middle name "Keanu," by the way. So she's not completely off the hook for this kid's future stint in psychological therapy.It could be worse. Imagine a kid named Hurley or Redick. Or worse...Krzyzewski. On the other hand, the kid could have been named Montross. Or Jordan, if he was lucky.In a related story, a couple in Minnesota named their kid after Joe Mauer. And I thought I was a dork because I want to name my firstborn son David Webb (if you get the reference, kudos to you).(via Deadspin, Fayetteville Observer)

For sale: Golden State Warriors, slightly used

For sale: Golden State Warriors, slightly used

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 22, 2010

Want to buy a an NBA franchise, and you have about $315 million? Well, you're in luck. The Golden State Warriors are up for sale. Though you may have to wait in line, because Larry Ellison, CEO of Oracle, has been waiting for his chance at owning the team for a while.Christopher Cohan, who owns an an 80% stake in the Warriors, ended months of speculation and officially put the team up for sale Monday. He's hired Galatioto Sports Partners to help facilitate the sale. Reports of a possible sale have been around since last July. Ellison has reportedly been wanting to buy the team (Oracle has the naming rights to the team's arena) but bemoaned in January that "unfortunately you can't have a hostile takeover of a basketball team." Now he might have his chance.The Warriors, by the way, are described as "are a premier NBA franchise" in a press release put out by the team. If by "premier" you mean the last place team in the Pacific Division with a 19-50 record, that is. Well at least it makes you more "premier" than the New York Knicks, I guess.(via SB Nation, USA Today, Yahoo! Sports)

Clausen and Tebow not on Browns' radar?

Clausen and Tebow not on Browns' radar?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 21, 2010

Don't expect Jimmy Clausen or Tim Tebow to be wearing a Browns jersey next season. Mike Holmgren isn't quite sold on them. Interviewed by the Cleveland Plain-Dealer, the Browns President said the team would draft a quarterback. However, he wasn't too keen on Clausen or Tebow.In regards to Clausen, Holmgren said:"I wish I liked him more," he said. "You know how you have a type of player that you like? It's not scientific. People like him a lot. He'll go high. But it would be hard for me [to take him]." Translation: We've had enough of Notre Dame QB's thank you.As for Tebow, while he was invited to pay a private visit with the Browns, Holmgren doesn't seem willing to use a projected second round draft pick on him...."There are areas of the football team that we really have to help -- the secondary, offensive line -- to get the team better. This year it would be pretty hard to use the second [round] pick to get a quarterback. It would be pretty hard for me. "Next year might be easier. We've got [three picks in the third round and four in the fifth round] going for us. But I'd have to have another second-round pick [to take a quarterback in the second round]." If if makes Browns' fans feel happier, there was no mention of Colt McCoy. So he might still be on the radar in Cleveland. (via Cleveland Plain-Dealer)

Your

Your "Sexy" Lane Kiffin update

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 21, 2010

It does seem that Lane Kiffin is easily going to beat Natalie Grubbs in the first round of Esquire's Sexiest Woman Alive Madness tournament. So it might be time to start scouting out Kiffin's "Sexy" competition, starting the the Sports Bracket, where Lane and Natalie are located.(2)Tanith Belbin vs. (15)Daniela HantuchovaThe lovely ice dancer Belbin holds a slight 51%-49% lead over the beautiful Slovakian tennis player.(4) Serena Williams vs. (13) Gina CaranoSerena may be the queen on the tennis court, but MMA star Carano reigns supreme in this match-up 84%-16%(5) Ana Ivanovic vs. (12) Heather MittsThe soccer star is easily beating the tennis star 68%-32%(6) Lindsey Vonn & Julia Mancuso vs. (11) The "Panamanian Cricket Team"America's Olympians are getting beat by what may be the phoniest sports entity since the Swedish Bikini Team 69%-31%. Patriotism obviously means nothing to voters.(7) Matt Stafford's Girlfriend (Kelly Hall) vs. (10) Scott Podsednik's Wife (Lisa Dergan)America's love for football stretches wins out against America's Pastime 61%-39%(8) Erin Andrews vs. (9) Danica PatrickDanica is edging out Erin 52%-48% in what is obviously a hotly contested race.Should they both make it through Kiffin would face Danica Patrick in round two. Brace yourselves for an epic battle.(via Esquire)

Expect Tiger Woods to talk a lot, say little in ESPN interview

Expect Tiger Woods to talk a lot, say little in ESPN interview

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 21, 2010

The Associated Press is reporting that ESPN will air an interview with Tiger Woods tonight at 7:00 P.M. Eastern. Tom Rinaldi will reportedly be handling the interview for the World Wide Leader.No further details about the interview are available, but don't expect any salacious new information coming from Woods. This will probably be as sanitised for his protection as the Bob Costas interview with Mark McGwire was. You'll have to wait for the next batch of Woods' illicit text messages to pop up online for that.(via boston.com)

The other obvious Kansas joke...

The other obvious Kansas joke...

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 20, 2010

Yeah, I had to go there.

Kansas gives illustrative descripton of your brackets after today

Kansas gives illustrative descripton of your brackets after today

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 20, 2010

The band, that is. Not the basketball team.

The Gaels of St. Mary's ah, hear they are calling...

The Gaels of St. Mary's ah, hear they are calling...

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 20, 2010

It's like Christmas in March for St. Mary's fans!The Gaels of St. Mary'sAh. hear they are callingThe young loves, the true lovesTo the Sweet SixteenAnd so my belovedWhen Wildcats are fallingThe loves bells shall ring out, ring outFor you and me

Dragging Lane Kiffin's name through the mud again

Dragging Lane Kiffin's name through the mud again

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 19, 2010

It's the moment you've been waiting for: The (almost) daily update on how Lane Kiffin's doing in Esquire's "Sexiest Woman Alive Madness" tournament. As of 4;40 PM EST, Kiffin still is beating first round opponent Natalie Grubbs by a commanding lead. He leads 58%-42%.It may be a little premature, but to celebrate Kiffin's almost certain victory, I decided it was about time our little Princess Lane needed a name worthy of such a title as "Sexiest Woman Alive." So what better way to find Lane a name than checking out some the internet's inevitable drag queen name generators? Oh, don't act like you're surprised they're out there. Anyhow, here's a sampling of what I came up with:Blogthings.com's Drag Queen Name Generator: Amanda Playwith.Rum & Monkey: Charlamaine Tension Midsumma Drag Name Genarator: Lois Carmen Denominator Of course he could always go with the obvious "Elaine Changer," "Helena Troy," "Lanie Kitten" or "Lanie Backstabber. "

Oregon AD runs away from the circus

Oregon AD runs away from the circus

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 19, 2010

As if things at Oregon weren't bad enough, the school is looking for a new athletic director. Mike Bellotti has left Oregon to become an college football analyst for ESPN. Belotti is not the latest rat to leave the sinking ship known as Oregon, but he's one of the few that haven't been thrown out.This included several members if Oregon's "Insane Clown Posse" football team, and men's basketball coach Ernie Kent, who was fired for poor performance.Where there are deeper reasons behind the resignation are uncertain, but Yahoo! Sports Adrian Wojonarowski tweeted that "Oregon's Mike Bellotti isn't resigning because Nike has World Wide Wes and Lynn Merritt running his basketball search. He wants to do TV." Which implied how much influence the Oregon based company has on the Oregon program.(via The Sporting Blog, Adrian Wojonaroski's Twitter)

Ryan Mallett reacts to

Ryan Mallett reacts to "scooter video"

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 18, 2010

What did Ryan Mallett think of LSU Freek's video where music was added to a clip of Mallett making his way on the Arkansas Kansas with his injured foot resting on some sort of four-wheeled something-or-another? You know, this one?Well, when asked he seems amused by it. “You’ve got to take it with a grain of salt...There’s going to be people from other teams putting it on the Internet. A million people have sent it to me in my e-mail. I just laugh every time...It doesn’t get to me or anything.”That's nice, it still won't get Mallett back on the Ryan List, though.As for LSU Freek, he tweeted " First time ever a target of mine has confirmed he saw my potshot... Props to Mallett for having a sense of humor."(via Mr. SEC, Arkansas News, LSU Freek's Twitter)

Is Tom Brady pulling a Favre? He's not working out with the Pats

Is Tom Brady pulling a Favre? He's not working out with the Pats

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 18, 2010

Don't be alarmed, but Tom Brady still hasn't shown up for the Patriots' voluntary offseason workout program in Foxboro. He's still out in Los Angeles with wife Giselle Bundchen his two sons, and a new dog. Brady claims "that he still does the required training, just not always in Foxboro because his lifestyle has changed with a wife and two children."Like I said probably nothing to worry about, but it makes you wonder if this is how Brett Favre started in his lack of spending his offseason with the team ways.(via National Football Post, Boston Herald)

Dawgageddon:UGA clamps down on tailgating fun and carnage

Dawgageddon:UGA clamps down on tailgating fun and carnage

By Juan Cena in SWRT on March 18, 2010

University of Georgia President EvilMichael Adams was not happy with the untidiness of some Georgia tailgaters in Athens last year. Well, more like a lot of tailgaters. The North Campus was pretty much trashed last year after several home games.Now UGA has come up with some new regulations to prevent future untidiness, along with a lot of fun. Reportedly banned from the North Campus next season are "tents, kegs, generators, televisions, amplified music, grills and cookers, tables longer than 4 feet and household furniture (folding chairs are OK)." Setting up for for tailgating will not be permitted "until four hours before kickoff."In addition "pull-behind items such as trailers and cookers" are banned from the campus entirely, along with "golf carts and ATVs."It could be worse. Dr. Evil Adams said that banning tailgating on the North Campus was brought up. “I think they hit a sensible, happy medium for now.”Happy being matter of perception.Got a problem with this? In that case Spencer Hall has a few words of wisdom:"It would be really, really nice to support someone getting furious about this, but cleaning up after yourself at a tailgate is basic football fan etiquette, and the people who share our fair state fail at doing that even along the roads of the place they consider home. (Their cars, however, are very clean.) It is a violation made worse by the beautiful campus being trashed in the process."Hard to argue with him there, even if he is an unrepentant Gator.(via Athens Banner-Herald, EDSBS)

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