Friday, September 4, 2015 • Morning Edition • "The place to talk some shit."
This just in: Andrew Luck is no longer scraggly.

This just in: Andrew Luck is no longer scraggly.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on August 2, 2011

If you're one of those ladies (or gentlemen) who are into the rugged, mountain-man look and were digging Andrew Luck's bearded appearance, you're now out of uh, luck. (via Ivan Maisel on Twitter) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Michigan State's Edwin Baker wants to get hot and sweaty in Lucas Oil Stadium.

Michigan State's Edwin Baker wants to get hot and sweaty in Lucas Oil Stadium.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on August 2, 2011

While much ado has been made about the pros and cons on the decision to hole the Big Ten's inaugural championship game in the warm and toasty confines of Indianapolis' Lucas Oil Stadium, at least one player says he's in favor of it. That would be Michigan State running back Edwin Baker. He claims the indoor arena could help his performance. "I would want to be indoors," Baker said. "You want to break a sweat, because when you have a sweat going your muscles are as loose as possible. As a running back, that's when you're capable to open up the most. So, me, I love to play indoors. "It's going to be hot. It's going to be humid. I'm excited for it." Certainly whoever comes out of the Leaders division would make Baker break out in a sweat, no matter where the game was played. Baker had better focus on getting through the season before dreaming of sweating it out during the Big Ten championship game.  The Spartans' division rivals are certainly going to make him work to represent the Legends of the Big Ten. (via The Detroit Free Press) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Big Tentacles: Joe Paterno, Russell Wilson, Ohio State, and more.

Big Tentacles: Joe Paterno, Russell Wilson, Ohio State, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on August 2, 2011

(Big Tentacles is the SWRT look at the Big Ten and the schools it not-so-secretly covets.)   No Direction Known. Ben Jones of Black Shoe Diaries ponders the conundrum of legendary Penn State head football coach Joe Paterno and murky post JoePa future of Penn State. (Black Shoe Diaries) Fast friends.  Wisconsin quarterback Russell Wilson and his new Badger teammates are bonding better and faster than some had expected. (Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel) Crawling Through the Wreckage.  Despite all of the Tresselgate chaos, Phil Steele still believes Ohio State will come out on top of the Big Ten Leaders Division. (Phil Steele's College Football Blog) Ohio State's new head football coach Luke Fickell is a himbo. Because Black Heart Gold Pants said so. (Black Heart Gold Pants) They're not saying, but they're saying.  While Michigan players tried not to say anything even closely resembling anti-Rich Rodriguez comments at Big Ten Media Days, some negative comparisons between his and Brady Hoke's regime's still leaked out. (Detroit Free Press) Matt Hinton, poet and a prophet.  Matt Hinton gives his predictions for the Big Ten in 2011. (Dr. Saturday) Lay it on the Line.  Corn Nation previews Nebraska's 2011 offensive line. (Corn Nation) Could This Be the One? Illinois' Oct. 1 attempt for a two-game winning streak against in-state rival Northwestern could end up being the most important game of the year for the Fighting Illini. (The Telegraph (Alton, IL.) Who's watching the Watchmen? ESPN Adam Rittenberg reports on the Northwestern's "PersaStrong" Heisman  campaign trying attract attention from ESPN with its plans for a "PersaStrong" billboard in Bristol, CT. (ESPN) Who's watching the Watchmen watching the Watchmen? Deadspin reports on ESPN's Adam Rittenberg report on the Northwestern's "PersaStrong" Heisman  campaign trying attract attention from ESPN with its plans for a "PersaStrong" billboard in Bristol, CT. (Deadspin) BASKETBALL Vote early, vote often.  Northwestern is letting fans vote on the new design for the Welsh-Ryan Arena basketball court. (Big Ten Network) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Lady Gaga dressed like Bear Bryant's hat on The View on Monday.

Lady Gaga dressed like Bear Bryant's hat on The View on Monday.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on August 1, 2011

No, I don't watch The View. But this pic of Lady Gaga hanging out with Whoopi, Barbara Wawa, and crew in  an all houndstooth outfit just had to be shared. If only because of the memories of The Bear it brings up. (via Entertainment Weekly) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Lady Gaga dressed like Bear Bryant's hat today on The View on Monday.

Lady Gaga dressed like Bear Bryant's hat today on The View on Monday.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on August 1, 2011

No, I don't watch The View. But this pic of Lady Gaga hanging out with Whoopi, Barbara Wawa, and crew in  an all houndstooth outfit just had to be shared. If only because of the memories of The Bear it brings up. (via Entertainment Weekly) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Lady Gaga dressed like Bear Bryant's hat today on The View

Lady Gaga dressed like Bear Bryant's hat today on The View

By Juan Cena in SWRT on August 1, 2011

No, I don't watch The View. But this pic of Lady Gaga hanging out with Whoopi, Barbara Wawa, and crew in  an all houndstooth outfit just had to be shared. If only because of the memories of The Bear it brings up. (via Entertainment Weekly) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Tauren Poole mocks Tyler Bray's "little bitty arm."

Tauren Poole mocks Tyler Bray's "little bitty arm."

By Juan Cena in SWRT on August 1, 2011

Is there a personality problem at Tennessee? Or is there just a senior whose mouth is moving faster than his brain? Vols' senior tailback Tauren Poole gave the Chattanooga Times-Free Press one doozy of a quote regarding his team's star quarterback.  "We definitely need the running game to win games," senior tailback Tauren Poole said. "We can't rely only on Tyler's little bitty arm to throw the ball every single play, even though he's talented enough. We're going to need to run the football." "Tiny little arm?" that "tiny little arm" has done more than enough to give Tennessee fans hope that the dog days on Rocky Top are over there. Meanwhile, Poole's stats from last year are a little more up and down. "Though the 5-foot-10, 215-pound Poole was one of just six players in the league to break the 1,000-yard mark and had solid games against Oregon (162 yards), LSU (109) and Alabama (117), he had his struggles. He rushed for a combined 96 yards in losses to Florida, South Carolina and North Carolina." It sounds like Poole is going to definitely run more than his mouth this season.   (via Chattanooga Times-Free Press) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Nick Saban, Mark Richt, Vanderbilt, and more.

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Nick Saban, Mark Richt, Vanderbilt, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on August 1, 2011

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC news, with the occasional pesky Southern school from another conference.)     Signs of the Apocalypse. Ten nightmare scenarios that could lead to the destruction of the SEC as we know it SEC expansion. Hide your kids, hide your wife. (Saturday Down South) On a related front, Nick Saban is the Devil. Because Matt Youmans said so. Shut up, Matt. (Las Vegas Journal Review) Getting down to business. ESPN's list of the start dates for SEC practice. (ESPN) "How Would Alabama Fans React To Another Nine-Win Regular Season?" Not too well, probably. (Saturday Down South) Another "Mark Richt on the Hot Seat" article? Pretty much. (SB Nation) Experience preferred. The Knoxville News Sentinel's John Adams expects Tennessee to benefit from experience in the quarterback, offensive line, and secondary areas. (Knoxville News Sentinel) A slight change of plans? The 2012  game between South Carolina and Vanderbilt may be moved to the start of the season for a Thursday night game on ESPN. (The Tennessean) Sneaking a peek. The Tennessean gets a look at Vanderbilt's newly renovated locker room. (The Tennessean) A wise man can hear profit in the wind. Arkansas has trademarked head football coach Bobby Petrino's "We didn't come to paint" line he made after the Razorbacks' win over LSU last season. (Arkansas News) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

What do Oklahoma fans think of Oklahoma State's new uniforms?

What do Oklahoma fans think of Oklahoma State's new uniforms?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on August 1, 2011

About what you'd expect.   (via Crimson and Cream Machine) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Crossing the Atlantic, Panic Room edition. With UNC, Dabo Swinney, Paul Johnson, and more.

Crossing the Atlantic, Panic Room edition. With UNC, Dabo Swinney, Paul Johnson, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on August 1, 2011

What, me worry? (Crossing the Atlantic is a look at the ACC and other schools on the East Coast.)   Looking a little freaked out there, 8-Ball?  Well you should, and not just for Clemson, either. It seems that a lot of ACC schools have more issues than the Book-A-Million magazine rack. Is "UNC Football at the Crossroads?" It seems like it's about at the edge of a cliff, if you want me to be really honest about it. (Tar Heel Fan) From the "There's a possibility, but no chance" dept.  Some probably mindless speculation on current Texas head football coach Mack Brown coming back to UNC. Yeah, I don't see that happening either. (The Sports Assassin) Panic on the streets of Clemson. According to ChuckOliver.net's Jody Whitt, Clemson fans should have a lot to be concerned about in the upcoming season. (ChuckOliver.net) Dazed and Confused? Meanwhile, the Kang of College Football himself, Chuck Oliver,  compares Dabo Swinney to George W. Bush. And not in a good way, either. (ChuckOliver.net) Off on the wrong foot? The relationship between new Maryland head football coach Randy Edsall's staff and one of the state of Maryland's elite high school programs may already be on the rocks. (The Washington Post. HT: Testudo Times) Condition Critical? 2011 could turn out to be a "critical" year for Georgia Tech head football coach Paul Johnson. (From the Rumble Seat) Boston College's 2011 depth chart. It sounds like BC fans should be a little worried when it comes to the quarterback. It's a long way down since the days of Matt Ryan. (BC Interruption) Get 'em while they last.  Single-game tickets for Miami football this season can be had for as low as $19. Except for the Ohio State game, which starts at $40. That's even with the Buckeyes coming into the game with two black eyes. (The Miami Herald) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Here's the Dan Persa Heisman Trophy campaign billboard.

Here's the Dan Persa Heisman Trophy campaign billboard.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on August 1, 2011

According to the Chicago Sun-Times, this is what the billboards promoting Northwestern quarterback Dan Persa as a Heisman Trophy candidate will look like. Drivers in Chicago and Bristol CT. (the home of ESPN) will get to see this in person on the side of the road (or wherever it finally shows up). Notice that the billboard refers to Persa as "Chicago's Heisman Candidate." Never mind the fact that he's really from Bethlehem, PA. It's part of Northwestern's campaign to brand itself as "Chicago's Big Ten Team." But wait, there's more. The Sun-Times also provided a picture of the 7 lb. purple dumbbells that will be going out to sportswriters across the country. (Presumably, the ones who actually vote on the Heisman.) It's a nice package, but the 7 lb. weight (a reference to Persa's no. 7 jersey number) seems a little light. I get the joke, but the amount of weight isn't quite what I have in mind when I go to the gym. Persa Strong deserves at least a 25-35 lb. weight. (via The Chicago-Sun Times. HT: Sippin' on Purple) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Big Tentacles: Kirk Cousins, Luke Fickell, Kirk Herbstreit, and more.

Big Tentacles: Kirk Cousins, Luke Fickell, Kirk Herbstreit, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 31, 2011

(Big Tentacles is the SWRT look at the Big Ten and the schools it not-so-secretly covets.)   Why is this picture of Herky Hawk here? Because I saw Captain America last week and it was awesome. Need a better reason? Hungry Like the Wolf.  Michigan State senior quarterback Kirk Cousin's plan for the Spartan's conquest of the Big Ten in 2011 involves keeping the team hungry and motivated. (The Grand Rapids Press) I Will Not Take These Things For Granted.  Despite a successful 2010 season, Michigan State free safety Trenton Robinson doesn't go around thinking that he's entitled to be a starter in 2011. (The Grand Rapids Press) Ain't nobody gonna hold him down? P. Diddy's son, Justin Combs, is being recruited by Illinois. (The Sports Bank) Strong enough to be your man.  The Heisman Trophy campaign for Northwestern QB Dan Persa now has its own Twitter hashtag with #Persastrong.  And a Twitter account featuring the man himself. (Lake the Posts) How's the Hawkeye reaction to the Iowa-Nebraska "Heroes Game" name? About what you would expect. (Black Heart Gold Pants) October. And kingdoms rise. And kindgoms fall.  With Nebraska, Michigan St., and Ohio St. on Wisconsin's  schedule for October, the Badgers should know if their in the penthouse or the poorhouse when comes to the Big Ten Leaders division title by the time Haloween rolls around. (Dr. Saturday) Jim Tressel was "a tragic hero." Because Michigan St. head football coach Mark Dantonio said so. (Detroit Free Press) An uphill climb.  Ohio State head football coach Luke Fickell has a tough job ahead oh him keeping in-state prospects from skipping the beleaguered Buckeyes in favor of its Big Ten rivals. (The Detroit Free Press) Plausible denial.   Kirk Herbstreit denies that moving his wife and unholy band of Aryan hellspawn cute little kids from Columbus, OH to Nashville, TN had anything to do with Ohio State fans mad over his remarks about former Buckeyes' head football coach Jim Tressel. (The Oklahoman) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Mark Richt's favorite song was written by his son.

Mark Richt's favorite song was written by his son.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 31, 2011

ESPN gave the coaches of the SEC a questionnaire containing the usual assortment of touchy-feely questions. Included in the batch was one asking what the coaches' favorite song and/or musician. Answers ranged from the totally obvious (Tennessee's Derek Dooley being a fan of the school's number one jock sniffer, Kenny Chesney),  to the somewhat disturbing and hard to comprehend (please tell me Les Miles was kidding about listening to Lil' Wayne). Florida's Will Muschamp gets bonus points in picking Van Morrison's "Crazy Love," the song he and his wife first danced to as husband and wife. As for Georgia head football coach Mark Richt, he had to go the full sentimental route and picked a song written by his second oldest son, David. The title of the song is "Thinking About You," and not surprisingly, it's a praise and worship song. Sure Richt went all dad with his answer. But honestly who could blame him? (via ESPN) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Trent Richardson, Mark Richt, Les Miles, and more.

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Trent Richardson, Mark Richt, Les Miles, and more.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 31, 2011

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC news, with the occasional pesky Southern school from another conference.)      Leaders of the Pack. Alabama tailback Trent Richardson and South Carolina running back Marcus Lattimore lead the pack of SEC Heisman Trophy hopefuls. (thetowntalk.com) Where'd You Go? Alabama is dealing with a slew of departing players. (Columbus Ledger-Enquirer) Superstition ain't the way. T. Kyke King of Dawg Sports is a little unnerved over the fact that Georgia head football coach Mark Richt claims that he isn't a superstitious person. (Dawg Sports) On a related front, Georgia not getting hammered by the NCAA over Mark Richt's inadvertent text message to a recruit is apparently being credited to Richt, uh, murdering a unicorn. With a kitten. Someone's obviously been  reading Black Heart Gold Pants' too much. (Year of the Dawg) Auburn fans reveling in 'Bama's T-Town Menswear mini-brouhaha? Of course they are. (Track 'Em Tigers) Head exploding scary thought of the day: Les Miles listens to Lil' Wayne. (ESPN) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

Northwestern begins pimping Dan Persa as a Heisman Trophy candidate.

Northwestern begins pimping Dan Persa as a Heisman Trophy candidate.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on July 31, 2011

There's strong, and then there's "Persa Strong."* That's the slogan Northwestern will be using in its campaign to promote senior quarterback Dan Persa as a Heisman Trophy candidate. And school is going to splash it on billboards in Chicago and  Bristol, CT. Latter being where ESPN is headquartered. The Bristol location for one of the billboards makes sense as ESPN has greater influence on the college football world than any sports media guru in New York City. Which was the site of the most notorious example of using a billboard in a Heisman campaign involving Oregon's 2001 pimping of QB Joey Harrignton in Times Square in. It also makes sense in the fact the credit for the inspiration (or blame) for the inspiration of the slogan is being given to ESPNs' Bruce Feldman. "NU officials chose the theme "Persa Strong" after ESPN.com's Bruce Feldman named Persa the 10th-strongest player -- and strongest quarterback -- in the nation. The 6-foot-1, 210-pound Persa can bench-press 360 pounds and squat 520." Northwestern will also be sending out 7 lb. purple dumbbells to 80 lucky members of the media. Because Persa's number is no. 7, get it?  That idea was so cheesy Wisconsin should have used it. *Apologies to the U.S. Army (via The Chicago Tribune) Originally Pubished at: Shirts With Random Triangles

The Outhouse is not responsible for any butthurt incurred by reading this website. All original content copyright the author. Banner by Ali Jaffery - he's available for commission!