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What Passes for Life: Texas Two-Step edition

What Passes for Life: Texas Two-Step edition

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 16, 2010

(What Passes for Life is SWRT's collection of sports and non sports related links and hi-jinks.)Is it just me? Or does One-eyed Steve Nash remind anybody else of Jonah Hex? Texas "Head-Coach-In-Waiting" Will Muschamp might be ready to go elsewhere in 2011. Because Tony Barnhart said so. (Mr. College Football)Aaron Rodgers wants to sit down with Todd McShay and watch film together. Personally if I were Rodgers think I'd rather hang out with Todd McShaved. But I doubt it would be game films that McShaved would be interested in. (Shutdown Corner)The search for the Atlanta Hawks' new coach. Dallas Mavricks assistant coach Dwane Casey may be the favroite. (Atlanta Journal-Constitution)Death Wish of the Day: Strikeforce heavyweight champion Alistair Overeem wants to fight Fedor Emelianenko. (Cagewriter)Ewwwwww moment of the day. High school softball coach made players who struck out drink out of a cleat. (The Big Lead)Brady Quinn odd man out in Denver? Speculation that Quinn could go to either Jacksonville or Minnesota. Then again, his looks may just save him. (Real Fantasy)

Fraking lasers, how do they work? Happy 50th birthday to the laser

Fraking lasers, how do they work? Happy 50th birthday to the laser

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 16, 2010

May 16 marks the 50th anniversary of the invention of the laser. Or to be more precise, the first successful testing of the laser. Without it, where would Dustin Pedroia be?Since its creation, the laser has found many uses in society. Like torturing cats with laser pointers.I'm sure the laser's inventors would be pleased.(via Yahoo! News)

Oh Snap! Moment of the Day: Don't Stop Belivin' edition

Oh Snap! Moment of the Day: Don't Stop Belivin' edition

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 15, 2010

So Sting, Bruce Springsteen, Elton John, Blondie's Debbie Harry, Lady Gaga, and Dame Shirley Bassey (of the Goldfinger title song fame) got on stage together at a for Sting's Carnegie Hall benefit concertRainforest Fund. Guess what song they picked to sing?It's kind of hard to think less of at least five of the biggest legends in music history (plus Lady Gaga), you I almost do. (And no, that's not a dis at the song. It's on my iPod, for cryin' out loud!)Also, it's hard sad to see that Debbie Harry just hasn't aged well (Lady Gaga take note). Compared her to Dame Shirley, who looks awesome, and she's 73.What's even worse, six of the world's biggest stars sing "Don't Stop Belivin'," and it can barely hold a candle to this:And oh, how I so wish Journey and Steve Perry would mend their fences. Journey going on tour with that Arnel Pineda guy reminds me too much of Chandler Bing's dad leaving his mom for the house-boy for some reason.(via New York Times. Thanks to Royal Nonesuch at The Outhouse for pointing this out.)

What Passes for Life: Trucking Along Edition

What Passes for Life: Trucking Along Edition

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 14, 2010

(What Passes for Life is SWRT's collection of sports and non sports related links and hi-jinks.)New England Patriots Wes Welker says his knee rehab is "kind of trucking along." I hope by that Welker means that he isn't "trucking along" like this:Ryan Mallett is never going to live that down. (CBS Sports)Oh look, a smiley war! (The Outhouse. Thanks to timberoo and avenging titan for all the fun.)Is going after Rutgers really worth it for the Big 10? A logical and sober look at whether Rutgers is really capable of giving the Big Ten Network a foothold in the New York City market. (Black Heart Gold Pants. Yeah, that kind of surprised me too.)List of the Day: "The 10 Worst MMA Fights of All Time." One of Anderson Silva's recent fights made the list. Surprise! ( SB Nation, Cracked)Houston hopes to be a BCS buster again. There's a possibility, but no chance. (Dr. Saturday)Machete-wielding ex-IHOP employee attacks his former workplace. Robert Rodriguez is probably going to be blamed for this. (WSB-TV)

Cleveland willing to embarrass itself to keep LeBron James

Cleveland willing to embarrass itself to keep LeBron James

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 14, 2010

As the "Will LeBron James leave Cleveland" saga reaches its nauseating anti-climax, the sad attempts at getting him to stay are kicking into full steam. Sadly, this includes the way-too predictable attempt to get James to say with a song. And what sadder way to do record one than with a "We Are the World" rewrite complete with alleged Cleveland "celebrities."EMBED-We Are Lebron Video - Watch more free videosWhat's sad is that there are several politicians in this group, including at least one senator and the Governor of Ohio. The fact that politicians are willing to commit political suicide with their involvement with this shows how sad this whole situation really is in Cleveland.(via Deadspin)

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Friday the 14th edition

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Friday the 14th edition

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 14, 2010

(Covering Dixie Like Mildew is the SWRT roundup of SEC and ACC news)Like the picture? Good. It's the only Tennessee-related thing you'll see here today.ACC related Big 10 expansion silly talk of the day. Blogger for the Atlanta Journal-Constitution suggests reasons why Georgia Tech would make a good candidate for Big 10 expansion. This is why nobody buys the AJC in the ATL anymore. (Ramblin' On)It'd be just like old times, except it won't be. Miami and Notre Dame are in talks to meet at Soldier Field in Chicago in 2012, as well as possibly one or more other meet-ups. The phrase "two bald men fighting over a comb" comes to mind when hearing this. (Dr. Saturday, South Florida Sun-Sentinel)SEC vs. non-BCS schools. Team Speed Kills looks at the last time every SEC team lost to a non-BCS school in football. TSK includes losses to non-BCS schools before the BCS came into existence in 1998. After the BCS started, Florida, Georgia, and Auburn have never lost to a non-BCS school. (Team Speed Kills)Logan Gray might be Aaron Murray's wide receiver. Why does that You Tube song about Tom Brady come to mind when I hear this? Not the best thing to thing of. (SB Nation)SEC might clampdown on Mississippi State cowbells. Did I say it was Ole Miss fans who were obsessed with cowbells yesterday? OOPS!!! (Clarion-Ledger)

"Sexy" Lane Kiffin update: Still down but not out.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 14, 2010

The good news is that "Sexy" Lane Kiffin has picked up ground in his Esquire "Sexiest Woman Alive Madness" matchup with Heather Mitts. The bad news is that he still lags behind Mitts, who leads with a 59%-41% advantage. "Sexy" Lane still needs your help, so vote now. It'll be a better use of your time than Spencer Hall's attempt to mash Auburn up with Justin Beiber.(via Esquire)

Friday Morning Free-for-All

Friday Morning Free-for-All

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 14, 2010

More Proof that the NFL can't take a joke. The NFL sent out a cease and desist letter to the 420 Football League, which was using a logo that the NFL said was too similar to its own. See if you can tell the difference:Now why would Roger Goodell get bent out of shape about that? (The Last Angry Fan)What does T.O. dream of when he takes a little T.O. snooze? Like Mike Tyson's tiger in The Hangover, Terrell Owens dreams of Halle Berry. No word if he dreams of Berry in her Catwoman suit. (The Big Lead, TMZ)Bud Selig: Threat or Menace? Forbes claims Bud Selig's threats to force the sale of the Texas Rangers to go through could hurt the ability for teams to get financing in the future. Heck, he does that just by breathing. (Forbes)

Your Freudian Nightmare of the night. Law and Order edition

Your Freudian Nightmare of the night. Law and Order edition

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 14, 2010

There's really no explanation for this, it just is. Enjoy.(via Warming Glow)

WAR LAMENESS!!! Auburn needs your help picking out music

WAR LAMENESS!!! Auburn needs your help picking out music

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 13, 2010

Auburn is asking fans to vote on the song to be used for 2010 inrto video song on its website. The school picked a sundry group of possible songs ranging from the hip and current (30 Seconds to Mars "Vox Populi,") to the tired and clich├ęd (Survivor's "Eye of the Tiger." Ha Ha). At least Auburn had the taste to include "Hero," by Skillet in the mix, if only to give the Christian rock fans something to vote for. It'd be hard to not to vote against that one, though.Of course Auburn did give "fans" the chance to nominate their own choices. Because as Dream of the Endless once said, "What could possibly go wrong?"Enter Spencer Hall (aka the blogger formally known as Orson Swindle), who is calling on EDSBS readers to write in "Baby" by Justin Bieber. Needless to say this is may be the dirtiest attempt of internet skulduggery since Colin Cowherd got his listeners to cause The Big Lead to crash.Seriously, don't be talked in to performing a stunt like that. As funny as the phrase "War Beiber!" might sound, any such shenanigans just aren't worth it in the end. Just vote for the Skillet and go on your merry way.(via EDSBS)

Ole Miss + Boise State= More Cowbell!

Ole Miss + Boise State= More Cowbell!

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 13, 2010

Ole Miss has announced that Boise State will be coming to Oxford for the Rebels and Broncos first ever meeting on the gridiron in 2011. This is a perfect matchup. On one hand, the Ole Miss fanbase are known for their love of cowbells as noise makers during the game. As for Boise State...Yep, I went there. I wonder if she'll still be in school by then.(Ole Miss Sports)

What Passes for Life: Be kind to animals edition

What Passes for Life: Be kind to animals edition

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 13, 2010

(What Passes for Life is SWRT's collection of sports and non sports related links and hi-jinks.)My Heroes Have Always Been Cowboys. Leonard Davis of Dallas Cowboys helps a group of wayward ducks out of the 11th hole sand bunker and out of trouble at the team's Sponsor Appreciation Golf Tournament.View more news videos at: http://www.nbcdfw.com/video.Too bad there's not anybody who can keep the Oregon Ducks football team out of trouble like that. (Deadspin, NBC Dallas-Fort Worth)Mountain West wants to take Boise State to the prom. The Mountain West Conference might be ready to send an invite to Boise State to become a member. This has everything to do with the MWC wanting that elusive automatic spot in the BCS. (SB Nation)Things I learned last night. On a related front, the Mountain West Conference has its own network. Who knew? (SB Nation)Olivia Munn unleashed on network television. Olivia Munn may be currently be getting spanked by Evangeline Lilly in Esquire's "Sexiest Woman Alive Madness" tournament NBC has picked up the sitcom Perfect Couples, which will star the geek fantasy diva. Sadly, thirty minutes of Evangeline Lilly spanking Munn on TV would probably get better ratings. (Warming Glow, The Live Feed)How to make Junior look like Peyton Manning. Speaking of Esquire, the magazine went to NFL Flims president Steve Sabol for tips on filming your kid's sporting event. Now you can make Junior's Pop Warner game look like a Super Bowl highlight reel. (Esquire)America's Next Top Harry Potter Wannabe. Tyra Banks is writing a series of fantasy novels about a school for models. At least Oprah only picks crappy novels for her fans to read, not write them. (ABC News, thanks to Jude Terror at The Outhouse for the word up.)2011 MLB All-Star Game not going anywhere. MLB Dictator for Life Commissioner Bud Selig has said the 2011 All-Star Game will stay in Phoenix, and not move in protest of that pesky anti-immigration law. No news if any of the MLB's Hispanic players plan to show up. (Yahoo! Sports)Taking rap a little too seriously. Even though Real World: Brooklyn cast member Ryan A. Conklin inspired a lot of people with his service for America as a Soldier in Iraq, he isn't known for taking himself too seriously. He recently posted a clip on his YouTube channel reciting rap lyrics verbatim. Funny stuff.Make sure you check out Conklin's memoir on his first tour of duty in Iraq, An Angel from Hell. It's an awesome book telling what the war in Iraq is really like from a Soldier's point of view.

Pac-10 exapnsion and media talk: Everyone else is doing it so why can't we?

Pac-10 exapnsion and media talk: Everyone else is doing it so why can't we?

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 13, 2010

Any sign that the Pac-10 is finally deciding to enter the 21st century is something to take note of. The conference has hired the powerful Hollywood firm Creative Artists Agency (CAA) for consulting in several areas, including expansion and media rights. CAA was given the nod to help rebrand the conference as what Pac-10 commissioner Larry Scott calls "a modern collegiate conference." This could lead up to the Pac-1o starting its own network.That may seem a harder task than it looks. The Pac-10 has been very much as a conference more concerned with tradition than with progress. But as its joined-at-the-hip traditional Rose Bowl opponent, the Big 10, has taken the first steps in entering the 21st century expansion and the Big 10 Network, the Pac-10 obviously sees the need to keep up.CAA got the nod for its ties with Hollywood. It's expected that the agency will be bringing out some of the media celebrities it represents to Pac-10 events, which ranges from Oprah Winfrey and Steven Spielberg, to Miley Cyrus and Will Ferrell. Imagine a theoretical Pac-10 football championship with Miley Cyrus performing at the halftime show. One word: ratings.Of course the bigger idea is for CAA to help out with conference expansion and to handle a new media rights deal. With the Big 10 Network and the SEC's deals with ESPN and CBS as examples of what the Pac-10 needs to do to keep up, this will be a major focus for the conference. A Pac-10 network is a huge possibility and CAA is working on a business plan for such an undertaking.Of course the possible expansion of the Pac-10 is the thing that most sports fans and media pundits would be paying to. CAA was brought in to help point out which markets the Pac-10 should look to and which schools make the best candidates for membership. Not that the Pac-10 probably doesn't probably already know there to look (the Rocky Mountain region. Utah and Colorado to be exact). But CAA will be able to provide the best strategy to lure schools into cutting their current conference ties and jump over to the Pac-10.The Pac-10/CAA partnership is a bigger deal than it appears on the surface. While it looks like an average business deal at first, it could lead to possibly the biggest rebranding and reorganization in college athletic history.(via EDSBS, Sporting News)

"Sexy" Lane Kiffin needs your vote NOW!

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 13, 2010

The first results are in for the Sweet Sixteen round of Esquire's "Sexiest Woman Alive Madness" tournament, and they aren't looking good for "Sexy" Lane Kiffin. Soccer player Heather Mitts is currently beating Kiffin by a 64%-36% margin. That's a lot of ground to make up, but Round Two has eight or so more days left for "Sexy" Lane make up the difference.In fact most of the Cinderellas from the previous two rounds aren't doing so hot either. Tanith Belbin is getting pummeled by ex-WWE Diva Stacy Keibler. And even worse, Evangeline Lilly is beating previously unstoppably Olivia Munn 66%-34%. But that may be due Esquire putting the screws on geeks getting creative with stuffing the ballot box for Munn. Which may be the only way geeks get to...well, you know.But back to the matter at hand. Kiffin needs your support and your vote NOW to keep the dream of being the Sexiest Woman Alive alive.(via Esquire)

Random Triangle Time Machine: Chicks dig the long ball

Random Triangle Time Machine: Chicks dig the long ball

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 12, 2010

In honor of the announcement of Tom Glavine's number being reitred by the Atlanta Braves, here's the classic "Chicks dig the long ball" Nike commercial featuring Glavine, Greg Maddux, Heather Locklear and Mark McGwire.Of course now we know that McGwire's hitting power wasn't due to the shoes. Or any of that homoerotic sadomasochistic stuff Maddux was pulling on Glavine.(via The Grit Tree)

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