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Big 10 expansion: The voices in your head don't count as relaible sources

Big 10 expansion: The voices in your head don't count as relaible sources

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 10, 2010

A radio station in Kansas City claims that the Big 10 have offered invites to five schools for expansion. Those schools are Missouri, Nebraska, Notre Dame, and Rutgers. The later got the invite after ND declined, so the story goes.So far nobody believes the story, and SB Nation reports Missouri and Nebraska have denied the story. And Black Heart Gold Pants claims a whole different group of schools have been approached...along with Rutgers. Then again, BHGP tends to listen to an entirely different set of voices than the KC radio station does. Though those voices may be entirely more rational ones.(via SB Nation, Sports Radio 810 WHB, Black Heart Gold Pants)

[BLEEP] YOU, MASCOT! Philly Phanatic and umpire have a

[BLEEP] YOU, MASCOT! Philly Phanatic and umpire have a "Bad Romance"

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 10, 2010

Here's what everybody likes to see: A mascot getting the snot beat out of him. The Philly Phanatic, in his guise as "Lady Pha-Pha" (don't ask) decided to try to get an umpire to join him in a furpile. The result?I guess tasing the Phanatic was out of the question. Even so, the ump should get a huge raise for this.(via The 700 Level)

"Sexy" Lane Kiffin in the Sweet 16: It's on!

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 10, 2010

Voting in the Esquire "Sexiest Woman Alive Madness" tournament is on! The Sweet 16 are set and are ready to go after each other. "Sexy" Lane Kiffin is battling it out with US Women's soccer star Heather Mitts. There's only ten days to vote, so don't delay and get at it!One word of warning: don't get cocky and try anything creative to stack the results in Kiffin's direction. Olivia Munn was given a warning due to supporters allegedly using "bot computer scripts" to jack up the vote in her favor. So keep your voting fair and square.(via Esquire)

Les Miles:Expansion? We don't need no steenkin' expansion!

Les Miles:Expansion? We don't need no steenkin' expansion!

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 10, 2010

Les Miles doesn't think the SEC needs to go the way of the Big 10 and expand. And he expressed his views in the Orlando Sentinel."I don't know that the SEC needs expansion. The fact that they have a pretty good format for a championship game, I think the teams we have are certainly very competitive. When you go to expanding a 12-team conference, what team are you going to bring in that brings with it a strength and a financial package and a strength of following that will add to the conference? Really you're looking at at least two teams you need to bring in. I think that's going to be a difficult order."Miles may have time management issues, but he does make good point or two there. As a whole, the SEC seems rather complete in itself. (And honestly, if I could trade Clemson to the ACC Miami, Georgia Tech, and FSU don't have the same kind of true Southern flavor you would expect an SEC school to have. Same goes for Virginia Tech or Maryland. Virginia might. But seriously, would anybody want Virginia in the SEC? (Outside of Virginians, of course.)The only true "Southern" school that isn't in the SEC is Clemson. And while expanding the SEC to bring the Tigers in is interesting, there's a good chance most SEC supporters would rather kick another team out instead to let them in. I'd trade South Carolina for Clemson any day of the week.(via EDSBS, Orlando Sentinel)

The Golddomedammerung: ND women's golf team member caught lying about score.

The Golddomedammerung: ND women's golf team member caught lying about score.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 9, 2010

Notre Dame golfer Annie Brophy has been disqualified from the NCAA women's golf Central Regional for unsportsmanlike conduct. Specifically, she lied about here score. Brophy reported a 30 on the front nine at Otter Creek Golf Course in Columbus, Indiana. Kyle Lynne Veltri, assistant coach at ND figured that score couldn't be true and reported it to officials. The officials approached Brophy at the 14th hole to tell her of her disqualification. Nice to see the commitment to integrity carries on under the Gold Dome.(via Waggle Room, Golfweek)

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Mother's Day Edition

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Mother's Day Edition

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 9, 2010

A Message from The Bear: Call your mama. It's Mother's Day(via Roll 'Bama Roll)A "King" berates a "Nation". "The King of College Football" Chuck Oliver chides the Bulldog Nation getting worked up over high school junior Christian LeMay's plans to enroll at Georgia next January when the Dawgs' probable starting quarterback in 2010, Aaron Murray hasn't even begun his career. (Chuck Oliver's Blog)Frosted Orange is the color of schadenfreude. Rocky Top Talk counts down the "The 20 Most Heartbreaking Losses in the Last 20 Years." Read Part One with #20-16 here, Part Two with #15-11 here, then get more in depth with entries Ten and Nine. Expect to see a lot of losses to Florida an Alabama here. The 2001 loss to Georgia in the "Hobnail Boot" game had better be in the top ten. (Rocky Top Talk)

Rocky Mountain Hi-Jinks:Denver's Next Top Quarterback

Rocky Mountain Hi-Jinks:Denver's Next Top Quarterback

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 8, 2010

Denver radio station KS 107.5 decided to make an America's Next Top Model parody involving the slowly evolving quarterback contriversy involving Kyle Orton, Brady Quinn, and Tim Tebow. Sadly, this parody may be closer to the truth than anybody will ever be comfortable enough to admit. Seriously, you didn't think Quinn got signed because of his stellar NFL career, did you?While we're on the subject: Have any of America's Next Top Model's actually gone on to become top models? I don't seem to recall any showing up in the SI Swimsuit Issue or anything like that.(Via YouTube)

What Passes for Life: Laser show edition.

What Passes for Life: Laser show edition.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 7, 2010

Oh, don't act so surprised at this: Someone made a Dustin Pedroia laser show gif: Photobucket" border="0"> (Out of Bounds, Tauntr.com) Who'd win in a fight between Miss Piggy and the Smoke Monster? Lost vs. The Muppets (via Morning Glow) Couldn't he just play that Britney song? Colorado Rockies shortstop Troy Tulowitzki comes to the plate with Miley Cyrus' "Party in the U.S.A. blaring. He says it's for his high school girl fan base. Two words: Lawrence Taylor. (Big League Stew) And on a related front: Don't alarmed just yet, Patrots' fans. But Tom Brady is sporting the same kind of hairstyle Ben Roethlisberger was sporting before he buzzed it off for his meeting with Roger Goodell. (via The Big Lead) (Disputed) List of the Day. "The 6 worst Christian Bands of all-time." You know the person coming up with a list has absolutely no clue about the subject they are talking about when they declare Creed the "Worst Christian Band of all time." Seriously, go listen to "What's This Life For," count the number of times you hear the Scott StaphStapp say seven letter g-word, and tell me Creed is or was ever a Christian band. (guyism) This isn't the kind of wrestling Iowa's famous for. The latest bout of insanity from Black Heart Gold Pants features Iowa basketball players channeling WWE stars. Including Matt Gatens channeling his inner R***y O***n. (Yes, there's a reason why O***n's name is bleeped out. Just know that Ricky Stanzi would probably kick is butt on sight for what he did.) (Black Heart Gold Pants)

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Friday SEC/ACC news

Covering Dixie Like Mildew: Friday SEC/ACC news

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 7, 2010

Congrats to David Pollack: The Georgia legend's daughter, Leah Heather Pollack came into the world today. (David Pollack's Twitter)"Mr. College Football" predicts: Tony Barnhart polishes his crystal ball and sees Alabama and Ohio State playing for the BCS Championship. So Barnhart pretty much has 'Bama winning the BCS. (Mr. College Football)Frosted Orange Crush: Barbara Dooley shows up at a Big Orange Caravan appearance in Atlanta by her son, Derek Dooley...wearing Orange. Somehow, some way, this is Dr. Evil Michael Adams fault. (Atlanta Journal-Constitution, Go Vols Xtra)Bobby Petrino's house for sale in Arkansas: Don't get your boxers in a bunch, Hogs fans, he says he only wants to get a smaller place. Somewhere closer proximity to the airport, is my guess where he looking . (Dr. Saturday)Georiga quarterbacks have to stick together: In other UGA legend news, Buck Belue defends Bulldog quarterback coach/offensive coordinator (and former UGA quarterback) Mike Bobo. (Buck's Blog)Get well soon, Frank Beamer: Va. Tech's Frank Beamer may need surgery on a torn bicep muscle received falling while exiting an airplane. The reports that the concrete on the runway will have to be repaired are completely the delusions of Spencer Hall. (Dr. Saturday, examiner.com, EDSBS)

Somehow this makes sense: Tim Tebow, Twilight, and the Mayan Apocalypse

Somehow this makes sense: Tim Tebow, Twilight, and the Mayan Apocalypse

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 7, 2010

Some kid decided to post a YouTube clip rambling on about Tim Tebow and Twilight. And then tosses in dreading that The Hobbit movie might not come out before the world is supposed to end when the Mayan calendar runs out in 2012.So why is this being posted here? Because somehow Tim Tebow and the Twilight saga go together. Don't ask why, but they do. And throw the Mayan Apocalypse into the mix just seems fitting too. It just all seems natural, somehow.And no, Tim Tebow isn't a vampire. He's played too many games in the Florida sunshine for that. But if Josh McDaniels has dreams where His Tebowness rips his clothes off while turning into a wolf...well, it just wouldn't be too shocking.

Dustin Pedrioa wants to take you to the laser show

Dustin Pedrioa wants to take you to the laser show

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 6, 2010

Here's Dustin Pedroia giving support to his Red Sox teammate David Ortiz, who's been in a slump since...well, since ever. Inadvertently, he's given America it's next great pick-up line. Take a listen to this little gem. Then go start practicing it in the mirror.Yes America. No longer "the laser show" be reserved for those lazy nights at Stone Mountain where pop music is paired with technology that seems more and more archaic compared to Pixar's film library and Avatar. Now the "laser show" will be what every wannabe "Situation" is going to try to take the "Snooki" of his affection he sees at the bar. "Yo girl, wanna see the laser show?" This may be the greatest thing since Ric Flair transformed "Space Mountain" into something other a ride at Disneyland.(via The Really Dirty Mets Blog)

Alexander Ovechkin had a little lamb...

Alexander Ovechkin had a little lamb...

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 6, 2010

They said it couldn't be done, but here it is: A photo with an athlete and a farm animal more embarrassing than the one with Tom Brady and that goat. In case you couldn't tell by the missing tooth, that's Alexander Ovechkin of the Washington Capitals. And yes, that is his sheep. It was a gift to his family in Russia. The sheep's name is Byasha, which is Russian for "chokes on ice." (At least that's it should be)The sheep is kind of appropriate though. Look at Ovechkin in this picture. If you didn't know he was a millionaire Russian hockey player, he'd look like any generic redneck in Alabama. Look at him. Unkempt hair, missing tooth, gold necklace. He'd fit in just fine at any tractor pull or a Montgomery Gentry concert.In a situation like this, the nickname "Comrade Redneck" comes to mind. It seems to fit Ovechkin pretty well.(via Sportress of Blogitude, D.C Sports Blog)

What Passes for Life: Tequila Sunrise edition

What Passes for Life: Tequila Sunrise edition

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 6, 2010

(Note: I was tempted to use an image of Tia Tequila. But I've had enough problems with viruses on the computer in the past twelve months.)Blogger suggests that Roethlisberger should be sent to boot camp. To slightly paraphrase my favorite Clint Eastwood quote from Heartbreak Ridge: "The Marines are looking for a few good men. Unfourtinately, Big Ben ain't it." (MoonDogSports.com)Iowa only made $50,000 off of its Orange Bowl championship. Ah, the joys of creative accounting. (Black Heart Gold Pants)It's Complicated, Part Deux. Boston Red Sox pay tribute to prodigal son Nomar Garciaparra. Blog declares it "Revisionist History Night". (USA Today, Boston Dirt Dogs)Mets record for the month of April, complete with uniforms. Created by Gene, the anal-retentive Mets fan. (Mets Police)

Shirts Without Random Triangles:  It's always a dummy in Philadelphia edition

Shirts Without Random Triangles: It's always a dummy in Philadelphia edition

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 6, 2010

Yep, they're already selling t-shirts about the tasings at Citizen's Bank Ballpark in Philadelphia, as this badly filmed YouTube clip can attest. (Sombrero not included)In case you didn't get it the first dozen times around, the shirt apparently says "I got drunk. I got high. I got tasered. Another night at the ballpark." Ain't capitalism grand?(via Deadspin, Busted Coverage)

Yankees top most overrated list.

Yankees top most overrated list.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on May 6, 2010

ESPN the Magazine took a poll of MLB players during spring training. Among other questions, players were asked who the most overrated of their brethren were. The results landed three New York Yankees in the top three. Joba Chamberlain, Alex Rodriguez, and Nick Swisher made up the overrated trifecta.A*Rod and Swisher making the list isn't shocking. Chamberlain is another matter. If only because of the idea he was actually rated in the first place.(via New York Post)

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