Friday, December 19, 2014 • Evening Edition • "The CBR of comic book journalism."
Bud Adams invents a new kind of finger.

Bud Adams invents a new kind of finger.

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 22, 2009

What does Tennessee Titans' owner have flowing through his veins? Reptile blood? Ice water? Antifreeze? Massengill?After paying out $250,000 for a couple of middle fingers last week, Adams this week came up with a whole new finger altogether. He placed the following ad in The Buffalo News:It's this kind of snottish display of wealth that caused the Bolshevik Revolution. The Buffalo News probably didn't mind the ad money, and they probably they didn't mind using their paper to show what a jerk Bud Adams really is. But this is just a little too much. This kind of snottish behavior from owners is something the NFL really doesn't need. This certainly doesn't help Adams and the Titans' popularity around the country any.(via The Sporting Blog, ESPN)

The Golddomedammerung: Connecticut 33 Notre Dame 30

The Golddomedammerung: Connecticut 33 Notre Dame 30

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 21, 2009

Not quite there yet, but she's warming up.

FOX Sports announcers suspended for being mocking Iranian-born NBA player

FOX Sports announcers suspended for being mocking Iranian-born NBA player

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 21, 2009

A couple of FOX Sports Prime Ticket announcers who did play-by-play for the Los Angeles Clippers were suspended from last night's telecast because of comments made about Memphis Grizzlies rookie center Hamed Haddai. Haddai is the first Iranian born player in NBA history. So naturally Ralph Lawler and Mike Smith start making Borat comments and pronouncing Iranian as Eye-ranian (which apparently some viewer found offensive). (Borat was from Kazakhstan, by the way.)Did I mention Lawler and Smith worked for FOX Sports? Anyone really shocked by this? I sense a Keith Olbermann "Worst Person in the World" nod for these goobers, even if they weren't FOX Sports employees.(via The Big Lead, Los Angeles Times)

Gameday: Ohio State and Michigan

Gameday: Ohio State and Michigan

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 21, 2009

In case you didn't hear Ohio State and Michigan play today.(Yes, this was an excuse to post this .)

Grateful Dead Monopoly. Please Kill Me Now

Grateful Dead Monopoly. Please Kill Me Now

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 20, 2009

Out at the mall today I saw a Deadhead version of Monopoly:Now I have become Don Henley, Destroyer of Worlds.

Ryan A. Conklin and IAVA

Ryan A. Conklin and IAVA

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 20, 2009

Former MTV Real World: Brooklyn cast member SGT. Ryan A. Conklin tweeted today that he's got 40 days left on his current tour of duty in Iraq. That's good to hear. Meanwhile, here's a clip he made in conjunction with the Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans of America (I believe it was while he was on leave this Summer). Take some time to watch it, and spread the word about IAVA, especially it you know an veteran of Iraq or Afghanistan Vet.(via IAVAVids YouTube Channel)

The Golddomedammerung: Time to put the Paul Johnson rumors to rest

The Golddomedammerung: Time to put the Paul Johnson rumors to rest

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 20, 2009

Notre Dame still hasn't fired Charlie Weis yet, but they can mark one name off the list for possible replacements. Paul Johnson has signed an extension with Georgia Tech. Not there was probably even a remote chance of Johnson moving, it provided Jeff Schultz and Mark Bradley of the Atlanta Journal Constitution from speculating about it. It's a one year extension for a contract now ending in 2016, but it pretty much says Johnson won't be switching from the white and gold to gold and navy blue this year.(via Georgia Tech Official Athletic Website)

NFL future hazy for Tim Tebow

NFL future hazy for Tim Tebow

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 20, 2009

It's probably a good thing that Tim Tebow stayed at Florida for graduate, because NFL Draft gurus aren't too hot on him. The Orlando Sentinel asked ten draft "experts" about Tebow's drafy status for 2010. None of them were quite encouraging. A lackluster performance this season (ableit a to date undefeated one) hasn't helped his chances. The experts say it won't be until events such as the Senior Bowl and the NFL Combine that Tebow's draft statue is more solidified.(via The Orlando Sentinel)

Clemson's Dabo Swinney rechristens C.J. Spiller

Clemson's Dabo Swinney rechristens C.J. Spiller "Dos Ocho"

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 20, 2009

No.(via The Fayetteville Observer)

Rich Rodriguez Hubris Watch: Mitch Albom's two cents worth

Rich Rodriguez Hubris Watch: Mitch Albom's two cents worth

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 20, 2009

Mitch Albom took time to chime in about Rich Rodriguez. He questions if firing Rich-Rod after two years is a good thing and wonders if creating a "revolving door policy" is a good thing at Michigan. The seriousness of the alleged workout violations is also questioned.In the end the question for Michigan is going to be if it will be how fast can it get out of the hole Rich-Rod is digging if it lets him stay for another year. Reported problems between Rodriguez Tate Forcier have led to suggestions Forcier might transfer. Self -preservation may be the most important factor in Rodriguez's reign at Michigan.(via Detroit Free Press)

The real Jay Cutler won't talk to NBC, so they should interview a fake one

The real Jay Cutler won't talk to NBC, so they should interview a fake one

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 19, 2009

It looks like Bob Costas is going to need someone outside the Chicago Bears' organization to interview. Jay Cutler, Lovie Smith, and Bears' GM Jerry Angelo have all turned down NBC's requests for on-air interviews the guy that punked Dan Patrick out of all of those Emmys.If I could be so bold as to give a substitute for Costas to have a sit down with, how about NotJayCutler, the tweeter uh..."personality" that has done a lot to destroy Kissing Suzie Kolber's image of Cutler as a grade A box of kittens? A few (almost SFW) gems of wisdom from the horses read end mouth:"A kid in a hospital asked me to throw a TD for him on Sunday. WTF, I was just there to get some Valtrex.""Thank God Jake Delhomme is playing tomorrow night. Nobody will ever mention my five picks again.""I just dared Josh Beekman to put a huge stack of Pringles in his mouth. I think he's dead.""Rex Grossman's dad is talking **** about me. Guess I can't blame him for defending his daughter.""People are saying our season is already over. If that's so, how come Lovie won't let me go to Cancun next week?""A stripper pole is so 2005. I'm going to get a mechanical bull in my crib.""There's far worse things than throwing 5 INT's and getting fined 20K all inside of 24 hours. Like, for one, being Brady Quinn...""Dude, it'd be sweet as **** if Affliction did our game jerseys."(Do you know what's really sad? I really want to see what Affliction-style NFL jerseys would look like. I suck.)"Nice pass, Orton. Did your sister teach you to throw like that?"Bob Costas interviewing the fake Jay Cutler would be a whole lot more interesting than him interviewing the real one, I can tell you that.(via Chicago Sun-Times, Kissing Suzie Kolber , Twitter )

[BLANK] YOU, MASCOT!: Smokey (the cosplay version)

[BLANK] YOU, MASCOT!: Smokey (the cosplay version)

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 19, 2009

What's that, Smokey? You didn't seriously think I wasn't going to get around to going to mock you after I went after that tablecloth wearing mutt did you? Boy, do you have another thing coming!Frosted orange colored unis. Football players getting arrested for armed robbery. Lane Kiffin and Bruce Pearl seem trying to outdo each other in embarrassing their school...Tennessee is such cornucopia of things to poke fun at, isn't it?Tennessee must not really love their cosplaying mascot. Obviously not enough to give him a name different from the real life dog. I bet that causes a lot of issues. The dog probably gets more fan mail too. At least UGA differentiates between UGA VII and Hairy Dawg.Well, I will say Smokey the costumed mascot does have one thing going for him: He looks better wearing a suit than Bruce Pearl does.(apologies as usual to Matthew Gasteier)

Mark Mangino Hubris Watch: Try blaming this one on his weight

Mark Mangino Hubris Watch: Try blaming this one on his weight

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 19, 2009

Chances are that Mark Mangino will be coaching at Kansas after this season aren't looking too well. Reports abound of the kinds of verbal abuse Mangino has dropped on his players. Take this little gem, for example:One story involved former Kansas wide receiver Raymond Brown during preseason practices. Brown's brother had recently been shot and was recovering in St. Louis. When players were asked during a meeting to describe their commitment to the team, Brown stood up and told his teammates and coaches about the incident. Brown said he was trying to get the message across that life was too short to waste. Shortly after in practice, Mangino and Brown got into a confrontation on the practice field."Don't yes sir me, or I will send you back to St. Louis so you can get shot with your homies," Brown remembers Mangino saying. There's not enough fat in Mangino's body that Jason Whitlock can blame this one on. This little tirade can pretty much be pinned to the level of Massengill flowing in his veins.(via EDSBS, JayhawkSlant.com)

I Smell Lameness: Oregon fans rap about their Ducks

I Smell Lameness: Oregon fans rap about their Ducks

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 19, 2009

It looked like Oregon's chances of going to the Rose Bowl went up in smoke with the loss to Boise State at the top of the year. How things have changed. It looks like The Ducks are all but officially headed to Pasadena and their fanbase couldn't be happier.So, how do Oregon fans celebrate such a reversal of fortune? With a rap video, of course.I Smell Roses @ Yahoo!7 VideoThe longer this season goes on , the more I appreciate the GTG's.(via EDSBS)

The Golddomedammerung: More Paul Johnson replacing Charlie Weis silliness

The Golddomedammerung: More Paul Johnson replacing Charlie Weis silliness

By Juan Cena in SWRT on November 18, 2009

Last week The Atlanta-Journal Constitution's Jeff Schultz brought up the possibility (all the while claiming to dispell it) of Georgia Tech's Paul Johnson as a candidate for the Notre Dame head coaching job currently held by Charlie Weis. This week, Schultz's partner in mediocrity Mark Bradley gives the "5 reasons Paul Johnson isn't going to Notre Dame." Reason Number Five: "Notre Dame once hired a coach From Tech." Gee, a narcissistic blogger could have pointed that out. Oh wait...(via ajc.com)

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