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Idiot's Guide Weekly: Week Five

Written by Christian on Sunday, February 06 2011 and posted in Columns

Although it was a light week in the comic book world, IGW still delivers as best as it can (which isn't very much)!

Welcome to a weekly column summarizing the good, the bad and the ugly that occurred throughout the week in comics. With fifty billion websites covering all the minutia of the comic industry and dozens of comics hitting the shelves, it's about time that someone has the stones to take it all in and regurgitate it like a mother bird to her chicks. Idiot's Guide Weekly will cover pertinent news, the best and worst comics of the week, and anything else worth mentioning in a jovial and mocking manner. So enjoy it while it's fresh: Idiot's Guide Weekly aims to please.

The News:

Top News Story of the Week: Diamond Comics released the January sales figures and they didn't exactly look peachy . As was stated in IGW a few weeks back, both of the major two publishers had events going on last January, which usually translates to major sales. It's also been noted by a few sites that there were 23% less comics out this January as opposed to last January. Still, a 23% drop from last month and a 27% drop from last year isn't exactly the best news in the world.

We have a Captain America poster ! Personally, I like this mock-up done by our very own Prozacman.

It's looking like Cobie Saunders will be Maria Hill in the upcoming Avengers movie.I can see it.

The Comics:

Moment of the Week: Black Manta reestablishes himself as better than Aquaman in every conceivable way. (Brightest Day #19) Black Manta has always been a hands-on sort of guy. Aquaman, on the other hand, always seems to need a hand when dealing with things. Needless to say, I don't think the two will be shaking hands anytime soon.

Comic of the Week: Mice Templar: A Midwinter's Night Dream #2: More awesomeness from the mind Bryan JL Glass. While we've had mice running around with swords since Watership Down and Redwall, Glass and Oeming have created a fresh take that's one of the best fantasy books on the market.

Worst Character of the Week: Aquaman (in Brightest Day #19). You'd think he'd be able to keep a better handle on his hands by now. Dude needs to invest in some wrist armor or something.

Other comics of note:
Amazing Spider-Man #653: One of the few changes I didn't like about the BND reboot was reestablishing Spider-Man's identity being secret. When Peter rallies the New Avengers to save his aunt, it sort of gives it away to anyone who's not an idiot...hence the cliffhanger at the end of the book.

Superboy #4: While the plot seems to be picking up a little bit, the dialogue is just atrocious. "We were...starting to have feelings for each other." Come on, Lemire, no teenager, not even a clone of Superman, has spoken like that since the 18th century.

Hello... (New Characters)

Prime-Hunter: Villain of the future who enjoys killing heroes and currently lives in Smallville. Sounds like we know what happens to Krypto down the line.

Goodbye... (Dead Characters)

Aquaman's hand. You got resurrected and lasted 19 issues. Good show.

Quote of the Week: "What are you crying about, Aquaman? You should be used to that." Black Manta, slicing off hands and mocking his victims since 2011.

Everything Else (Musings and whatnot)

Sorry for the light week this week. Not a lot of comics came out and not a lot of interesting things happened this week. The highlight of my comic week: my dumbass kitten destroyed Scarlet #4, Wolverine #5 and Supergirl #60. Fucking shithead. I really like two of those comics and tolerated the third!

Be sure to watch the Super Bowl tonight for the trailers of Captain America, Green Lantern and Thor. Also, be sure to root for the Packers and their quarterback, Jake Gyllenhaal , unless you're into fatass quarterbacks that like to rape teenagers in bathroom stalls. Woooo, professional sports!

Next Week: IGW discusses why mice with swords are so awesome and conducts a instant poll over which Super Bowl trailer was the best! Tune in!

Written or Contributed by: BlueStreak

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About the Author - Christian

Christian is the exasperated Abbott to the Outhouse's Costello. When he's not yelling at the Newsroom for upsetting readers or complaining to his wife about why the Internet is stupid, he sits in his dingy business office trying to find new ways to make the site earn money. Christian is also the only person in history stupid enough to moderate two comic book forums at once.


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