Read on hemopheliacs!
You want to hear something weird? I have determined that I have no actual time frame for this column anymore. It can't be delayed as I'm not sure what kind of schedule I can keep anymore. Its gone from weekly, to slightly biweekly to 3 columns in a row 3 days a part I believe? Anyways, we'll see how things go depending on how busy I am lately.
My first point of business this week: Enough with the hating on Speed Racer. Its almost as bad as not watching the movie itself....which i'm honestly starting to believe that some of these "critics" haven't actually done. It would be one thing if they were actually intelligent bout their reviews but these people that get paid for their opinions are completely unprofessional when it comes to the review itself, which can be filled with such bile its as if the wachowski's have killed the first born child.
I personally loved the hell out of the movie which honestly was filled with such bright colors, awesome action moments, surprisingly mature topics and Mathew Fox as the coolest interpretation of racer x possible. Emile Hersh, John Goodman, Susan Serandon and christina ricci really make up a perfect cast as everybody really turns in some of the most believable and honest performances of their careers for such a cartoony movie. At the end of the day, little kids will fall in love with this movie and everybody who grew up on the cartoon will remember what made it so awesome to be watching it from when they were little.
This honestly in my mind makes up for the two matrix sequels which in my mind really felt heavy handed and phoned in on every aspect.
I'll add it to my dvd collection the second it comes out because honestly its just a fun flick.
Next on the agenda: I've had the cd for almost a month now, being one of the faithful fans that pre ordered the cd when the option was available. I'm speaking of course about : MC CHRIS IS DEAD! The much anticipated cd of MC Chris aka Chris Ward. For those of you who don't know who the man is his most famous work was on aqua teen hunger force as mc ppe pants and Sealab 2021 as Hesh. He's also the man responsible for the Boba Fett Theme song Fett's Vett.
Chris is also infamously a huge nerd and by huge nerd I mean that the cd in question is full of nerdy conversation and verses filled with skrulls, reeses pieces and a guest appearance by rocker Andrew WK.
The cd opens with the incredibly strong self titled album track mc chris is dead which tells the story of the undead mc chris who wont be collecting royalties from beyond the grave. The opening itself is very thematic as it feels like a funeral procession. The raps involved in the song show that Chris is definitely at the top of his game and that the rappers out in the game now should watch their backs as the nerd hero is out for brains.
The next track on the album is entitled Older Crowd and has become my personal favorite track. It really for whatever reason seems to resonate with me the most. the beat in the background really makes you want to dance along and the track itself is easily singable to.
The next song is reeses which is all about the snack food reeses peanut butter cups or pieces or the many different forms of reeses. Chris raps about the history of the snack and just how much he loves it compared to different candies.
Next on the cd is a track entitled pizza butt which is one of the stronger raps on the cd. It ends up being about everything from burning your mouth to digorno to losing weight.
The next track is Hoodie Ninja which I think should be the new name for the new street team. This track follows chris misadventures as a ninja and his search for the girl that makes him feel different then anyone else on the planet.
Next up is the first sketch on the cd called metaphor which has the undead mc chris visiting his agent who has heard his new cd which was recorded in the underworld. Where did he hear it? Oh the internet of course. His agent is voiced by a constant collaborator of his who now has his own show on ault swim called fat guy stuck in the internet. The delivery time of everybody in the sketch is brilliant and right on target. Its really funny and even shows continuity from past albums.
the next song on the cd is on* which is a comedic tale of chris having to need onstar to find a certain part of the female anatomy.
Kill it, the next track has a strong female opening which continues through the whole track and seems to another song that gets you dancing. It also shares a few things in common with reeses, older crowd and the rest of the tracks with a strong beat and strong rymes.
Rollercoaster is about another one of chris's favorite things in the world. This is also the song that chris raps about going to the comic shop to seek out the skrulls.
Next is magic, the second comedy track on the album. This features the entire crew of the rebellion podcasts who have to talk about surviving the zombie apocalypse. Featured in the sketch is the guys hiding from the dead mc chris, speaking on what summer movie they are looking forward to the most and just like its titled, magic.
Next up is a real nerd theme song and probably one of the top 3 tracks of the cd nrrrd girl. Everything from cassie lang to kang is mentioned and its really a nerd anthem about falling in love with a nerd girl. The track itself was released to the fans last christmas but the remixed version is much stronger and definitely worth the price of the cd.
falynn is really the rock track of the album and the song that i'm guessing will end up on rock band, the only negative is how short it is clocking in at under 2 minutes.
The masturbation song is a hillarious track about getting caught while doing the deed under a sleeping bag. Its definitely a funny song and kind of tragic in a way.
The next song is freaks which is really another nerd track speaking about how being different is actually an awesome thing and has an awesome catch in it.
the last real song of the album guest stars andrew WK and is named after the most memorable line in the movie galaxy quest simply entitled never give up. Its catchy and a strong finish to an amazing album.
The ending of the album itself features mc chris getting down to hell and is entitled pitchfork as he's forced to listen to horrible poems by the gatekeeper of hell. Its a solid joke which gets a lot of laughs and its very funny.
Overall the full cd should appeal to anyone who enjoys good music and its really his break into a mainstream field. It should get a lot of attention and hopefully a bigger fanbase. Its really worth a buy and can be found on Itunes, mc chris official website or on tour with him this summer.
Next I wanted to talk about one of the movies I know not a lot of people know about. The name of this movie is Waxwork 2: Lost in time. What makes this movie so unique you ask me? Well this movie features some of the biggest cult actors you could possibly ask for in one big movie. The movie itself came out in 1992 and features Zach Galligan, Bruce Campbell, David Carridine, Monika Schanrre, and marina sirtis.
The movie itself features Zach as the lead character who's girlfriend sarah is on trial for a crime she didn't commit. All they have to do to prove her innocence is find proof of the evil that they fought in the first movie. You of course do not need to see the first movie to get this as the evil shown is a chopped off wax hand which kills sarah's father at the beginning of the movie. Soon they find a secret compartment in their old mentor's house and a device which allows them to jump through time.
The movie was one of the first real comedic horror movies that allowed just as much time for jokes as it did for horror. We are dragged through homages to godzilla, king arthur, frankenstien, aliens, dawn of the dead, thehaunting and many more. We even get another cameo in the dracula scene by a young drew barrymore.
Its a great horror movie that really should be seen by everyone and can be found packaged with the original flick. And with so many great actors how exactly could you refuse?
Sunday June 1st saw the long awaited return of the cult hit the venture brothers just with a big twist. The first episode of the season is all about what happened to the monarch and doctor girlfriend at the end of the second season. We still have no idea what she said to him but we do get more of the moppets with number 21 and 24, plenty of flashbacks, several of monarchs old costumes and more history revealed.
It was a solid episode with plenty of laughs and we got to finally see more of the guild of collamatous intent. They were shadowed but it was still fun to hear from them with a few great gags. And fans of a certain villian will be glad to see that he's still in the land of the living.
Finally after a lot of processing in my head and expanding on a lot of my ideas I am ready to write my comic pitch. Hopefully a cool company will love what I have to offer and pick up my work. We'll see though, till next week this has been another conversation with myself.
Posted originally: 2008-06-04 02:29:23