- Written by Frankenstein, Former Agent of S.H.A.D.E. on Wednesday, March 13 2013 and posted in Features
FRANK HELP FRANK'S FRIENDS! ALSO, TOMORROW IS PI DAY! FRANK LIKE PIE, YOU SHOULD MAKE FRANK A PIE!
Source: FRANK NO USE SOURCES!
THIS FRANKS 17TH FRANK HELP! THAT MEAN ONLY 3 MORE UNTIL FRANK GET FREE SUBWAY SANDWICH!
From twitter, @PinkPeril asks: '@DCFrankenstein What green beverage will you be downing on St. Paddy's Day?'
FRANK DRINK JAMESON ON ST. PADDY DAY! AT LEAST UNTIL FRANK’S STOMACH SAYS “FRANK STOP!” THEN FRANK SWITCH TO GUINNESS! GUINNESS GOOD, SNAKES BAD!
From www.theouthousers.com, GLX asks: 'How much of your day is spent worrying about the lives of comic book characters?'
VERY LITTLE ANYMORE! FRANK USED TO CARE ABOUT CO-WORKERS, BUT FRANK NO EVEN GET PARTY OR CARD WHEN FRANK DEMOTED, SO FRANK NO CARE ANYMORE ABOUT THOSE GUYS! FRANK SPEND TIME NOW WORRYING ABOUT DEATHS OF COMIC BOOK CHARACTERS, SO FRANK CAN GET THE GOOD STUFF BEFORE OTHER SCAVENGERS PICK OFF THE CHOICE PARTS!
From www.theouthousers.com, sdsichero asks: 'FRANK, are you happy that DC got Diamond's GEM award for publisher of the year?'
NO! DC BAD! DARTH DIDIO BAD! IMAGE OR ONI SHOULD BE GEM WINNER! FRANK LOVE PROPHET AND L’IL DEPRESSED BOY AND SEVERED AND SIXTH GUN AND FRANK STILL MAD THAT DC MAKE HELLBLAZER GO AWAY! THAT GOOD BOOK!
From www.theouthousers.com, Lord Simian asks: 'Frank, why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near? Also, who put the bomp in the bomp-sha-bomp-sha-bomp?'
FRANK IS SPECIAL AND ALL ANIMALS LIKE FRANK! EXCEPT FOR HIPPOS! HIPPOS ARE WEIRD AND FRANK NO UNDERSTAND THEM! AND THEY MEAN TO FRANK!
FRANK FACT: FRANK NO PUT THE BOMP IN THE BOMP-SHA-BOMP-SHA-BOMP, BUT FRANK DID INSPIRE ITS CREATOR WHEN FRANK FELL DOWN IN FRONT OF HER WHEN FRANK HAD BAD FOOT TRANSPLANT! LADY NO WANT PUBLICITY SO FRANK NO TELL MONKEY MAN THAT PATTY DUKE COIN PHRASE!
From www.theouthousers.com, bkthomson asks: 'FRANK, I notice that on Handy Manny he is never paid on any of the jobs he completes why is that?'
SILLY BK, HANDY MANNY NO REAL PERSON, HE CARTOON AND THEREFORE NO NEED MONEY! YOU SHOULD ASK WHY FRANK NO GET PAID FOR ALL THE FRANKENSTEIN BOOKS OUT THERE! PUBLIC DOMAIN SOUND LIKE GOOD IDEA, UNLESS YOU ARE PART OF IT! NOW FRANK STUCK WRITING FOR WEBSITE NO ONE EVER KNOW ABOUT AND IS SECRETARY FOR JLD!
From skype, sdsichero asks: 'Dear FRANK why is xaraan so mean to me?'
BECAUSE SDS SUCK!
BRIDE OF FRANK SAY THAT THIS NO NICE AND VERY "UN-FRANK" AND FRANK SHOULD APOLOGIZE! FRANK TRY AND EXPLAIN THAT SDS DOES SUCK BUT SHE SAY THAT SDS IS SOMEONE'S SON AND THEREFORE IT HIS PARENTS THAT SUCK AND SDS ONLY "PRODUCT OF HIS ENVIRONMENT."
From skype, twigginater asks: 'Frank is a goo lad'
FRANK NO MADE OF GOO! TWIGG MEAN! THAT NOT EVEN QUESTION!
From skype, twigginater asks: 'good*'
OH, NEVER MIND, TWIGG IS NICE KID WITH IMPECCABLE TASTES!
FRANK DONE FOR THIS WEEK! IT GOOD WEEK! FRANK DO GOOD JOB, XARAAN SAID SO AND HE KNOW WHAT HE TALK ABOUT, HE MAKE A COMIC BOOK!
HAVE GOOD DAY!
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About the Author - Frankenstein, Former Agent of S.H.A.D.E.
Frankenstein is the swordwielding monsterfighting monster formerly employed by S.H.A.D.E., a global agency dedicated to fighting weird stuff. Unfortunately, Dan Didio laid off Frankenstein due to low sales, and Frank quickly lost the bulk of his intelligence trying to piece together DC continuity while updating his resume. Luckily, the Outhouse's staff is largely made up of dumb beasts, and Frank is now working as an contributing reporter while he is between jobs.
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