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p(RU)views featuring WIFE: Nova #4

p(RU)views featuring WIFE: Nova #4

RU and WIFE sit down and try to figure out what is going on in Marvel’s “First Look – NOVA #4!”



Source: Marvel Press Release

Welcome to a new feature from The Outhosue, the world's leading place for marriage advice and reconciliation, where ace reporter, RU, teams up with his wife, WIFE, to fill in the blanks left in Marvels "First Look!" previews. 

This instalment: Nova #4

Cover to Nova #1 (second printing):

WIFE: Why does he have a place for boobs?

RU: Because he likes to feel sassy!

WIFE: I like to imagine that he puts balloons in his costume during long flights so he can pretend he has a girl with him.

RU: reminds me of the killer from Silence of the Lambs, Buffalo Bill; “Would you touch me? I'd touch me.”

WIFE: *rolls eyes*

Cover to Nova #2 (second printing):

WIFE: I am suddenly overcome with the need to bust out into Somewhere Out There from American Tail!

RU: ‘nuff said

Cover to Nova #4:

WIFE: Is this a version of the Flashdance

RU: Is that the one with, Kevin Bacon?

WIFE: That’s Footloose, dude

RU: The one with Jennifer Beal?

WIFE: That’s Flashdance. I think she was some sort of welder/stripper.

RU: Is that the one where the rapey photo-shoot?

WIFE: You’re thinking of Fame. Moving on, are the welder/Skeletor people fighting him, drawn to his sexy aura (boobs), or what?

RU: “welder/Skeletor” I’ve never loved you more than I do now.

WIFE: I rule!

RU: I think they are pointing him to the bathroom, its obvious he needs a change of pants. Speaking of, when was the last time we changed RuRu.

WIFE: Are they the bad guys from Avengers?

RU: Either that or the Quintesson Judge from Transformers: The Movie

WIFE: I reached my 1980s boy knowledge threshold with Skeletor.

Page 1:

WIFE: Those are defenantly the Avengers’ things.

RU: I think they are called “Badoons.”

WIFE: He looks really happy for a kid floating around aimlessly in space.

RU: Reflects Marvel’s current output

WIFE: I see what you did there.

Page 2:

WIFE: Shazam!

RU: Wrong..nevermind.

Page 3:

WIFE: Ouch!

RU: Rule number one of space flight; steer clear of big grey hands

WIFE: Really?

RU: Rule #1 is actually “the enemy’s gate is down”

WIFE: Nerd.

RU: You love it

WIFE: He looks like he needs a band-aid and a kiss on his cappy.

RU: yea, he’s having a bad day, hope it gets better in Nova #4:
NOVA #4 (MAR130618)
Written by JEPH LOEB
Art & Cover by ED MCGUINNESS
FOC – 4/22/13, ON SALE – 5/22/13

WIFE: well played






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About the Author - GHERU


RU, or as he’s known in the writers’ room: the cute one, is relatively unappreciated in his time.  RU’s YouTube show, RUviews is watched by literally multiple people every month and his Outhouse articles have helped line many a bird cage.  Before you send RU a message, he knows that there are misspelled words in this article, and probably in this bio he was asked to write.  RU wants everyone to know that after 25+ years of collecting he still loves comic books and can’t believe how seriously fanboys take them.  RU lives in Akron Ohio (unfortunately) with WIFE, ‘lilRuRu, and the @DogGodThor.  You can also find him on Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, & even Google+ (if anyone still uses that).

 


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