Welp, this happened. Marvel has formally announced that the second Avengers movie will be named Avengers: Age of Ultron.
Frankly, I don't know what the fuck is going on. I'm incredibly drunk right now, and I'm not entirely convinced this isn't some sort of lucid nightmare.
However, if this is real, Marvel just announced that they're making a movie based off of THE WORST MARVEL EVENT OF THE LAST DECADE.
God willing, this is how the story pitch went:
Joss Whedon: Brian, why don't you tell me what happened in your comic event.
Brian Bendis (writer of Age of Ultron): Well, basically, we open to the Avengers hiding in a bunker.
Bendis: And then they travel to the Savage Land.
Bendis: And then Wolverine and Sue Storm travel to the past to stab Hank Pym.
Whedon: Nope, nope and nope.
Bendis: Then they return the future and see that Morgan Le Fay has taken over everything.
Whedon: The Arthurian villain? Nope.
Bendis: So they go back in the past, and then Wolverine stabs himself. Like twice. And then everything goes back to normal. Except there's a new redhead running around in next to no clothing.
Whedon: Fucking Christ, man. This is the most unpenetrable comic I've ever heard of. Did you even try on this thing?
Whedon: Fuck it, I'm taking your title and I'll just make everything else up as I go along.
And on that note, I'm going to drink more beer.