Monday, May 21, 2018 • Morning Edition • "We put the "O" in OCD."

Your Top Teams part 25

Written by Chris Mitchell on Wednesday, June 24 2009 and posted in Features
The team you all have been waiting for...




130. The Zoo Crew (21 points)

zoocrew.jpg"Scoff if you will, but I loved these guys. This was actually the first series I owned every issue of as a kid and I was PISSED when it got cancelled. The mix of zany jokes, bad puns, classic storytelling technique by Roy Thomas, fun art by Scott Shaw!, and actual characterization made for a book that was much more than "just a funny-animal book"; it was a romp, fun for kids and grown-ups alike (too bad both subsequent mini-series sucked so awful). Cap, Pig-Iron, Alley-Kat-Abra, Rubberduck, Yankee Poodle, and Fastback all had their quirks and tics, and all brought their own dynamic to the team in the way the best ensemble casts do. And come on, you have to love a book with villains like the Salamandroid, Frogzilla, Bow-Zar the Barkbarian, the Wuz-Wolf, Armor-dillo, Digger O'Doom, and President Mallard Fillmore's evil brother."

How the hell did this happen? I dunno if I should laugh or cry?? 21 points? Really?? lol What has this world become...

Six meteoric fragments set in motion by Starro the Conqueror brought about the origins of the Zoo Crew, Earth-C's very own band of heroes. Seeking the source of a strange plague on his own Earth, Superman broke through the dimensional barrier and came across Roger Rodney Rabbit (Captain Carrot). When Starro abducted Superman, Captain Carrot sought out Pig-Iron in Piggsburgh, Alley-Kat Abra in Mew Orleans, Fastback in Kornsas, and Rubberduck and Yankee Poodle in Follywood. Together they rescued Superman and defeated Starro.

Captain Carrot decided they had worked so well together that they should form a team, like the "Just'a Lotta Animals" comic book he wrote in his RRR identity. Everyone agreed apart from Pig-Iron, but once he had fought and overcome Armordillo, he changed his mind and decided he liked the idea.

At first, the plan was to base the group in Gnu York where Rodney worked. Yankee Poodle and Rubberduck, however, had many commitments in Follywood in their other identities of Rova Barkitt and Byrd Rentals. Hence the crew decided to be based in Southern California. With a grant from the United Species of America, they set up headquarters in the Z-building.

When Chester Cheese's father was murdered and Chester himself gained the power to shrink, he got the Zoo Crew to help capture his dad's killer. Later he joined them and the Changeling to defeat Gorilla Grodd. Convinced he was worthy, the others made Little Cheese the 7th Zoo Crew member.


129. The Thor Corps (21 points)

thorcorps.jpg"Gods. Four of them. All with hammers. All on the same team. Wicked awesome"

Ok, some people put Beta Ray and Thor, some put Thor Corps and such so again I made an executive decision and merged them all into one group. And what better way to follow the Zoo Crew, right? Trust me, wait till you see who is next....

It all started when an evil man named Zarrko tricked the Thor of the future. The Thor from the future was Dargo. Zarrko tricked Dargo into the past to battle the present Thor. The Thor from the present was Thunderstrike. After they started to fight another Thor appeared. He went by Beta Ray Bill. After Beta Ray Bill stopped the violence he had a solution. They decided to form a group called Thor Corps. Now the team was going to go after Zarrko. Zarrko wanted to become the all master of time. That’s when the Thor Corps who at that time were calling themselves Hammer Brothers went to Zarrko's ship. Many Villains were pulled from the time stream to stop the Hammer Brothers. People like Loki and Skurge. But, Loki did not want to be controlled like the others. So he turned on Zarrko and led to his downfall. After that was done Beta returned all the Thors to their original time before the ship exploded. Later the Thor Corps reunited when Demon Staff had Thunderstrike team up with Dargo and got Beta Ray Bill. He did this so they could help find Demon Staff's wife Ellene. Dargo couldn't say no because Demon Staff was holding his wife hostage. If they didn't help find Ellene he would destroy all reality. When they were transported to the place where Demon Staff’s wife was the leader Warlord Kargul transported them to World War 2. While there they were attacked by Captain America. Later they found a portal back to Kargul's world.

They then found Ellene but, she did not want to go with them. She said that he just wants to see her die. So later Kargul found out about Demon Staff trying to end all reality. That’s when Kargul went to Earth to stop him from doing this while Ellene remained on Kargul's world. Ellene then banished all the different Thor Corps members to different timelines. They had to battle Guardians of the Galaxy, Spider-Man, and Kid Colt. They then met back up with each other. Together they summoned the true Thor himself so they could defeat Demon Staff. As the reality began to fall apart Thor used his great powers and stopped the end of reality. That’s when Ellene told him how she felt and he realized he was wrong. So he reversed all of his doings. Since then the Thor Corps have not been together but they still remember they could be called upon for help one of these days.


128. Justice League Detroit (21 points)

jla-detroit.jpg"Vibe better be a fucking Black Lantern or someone is gonna die."

Hahaha. Wow. This post is so full of win it is unreal. I can hear Twigglet’s head exploding as he reads these entries now. Just relax Twigglet, shitty teams now means they do not beat your beloved Dark Avengers, right? Right.

After the Satellite era of the JLA, many of the members left due to personal reasons, and the team had to grow again. The members that remained were Aquaman, Martian Manhunter and Zatanna. After the invasion of alien, Debris, Aquaman reorganized the League. They enlisted new young members, Steel, Vibe, Gypsy, and Vixen. The team was based in a warehouse in Detroit, called 'the Bunker' and provided for by Steel's grandfather (and namesake), Hank Heywood. They were active until the original Crisis on Infinite Earths. Following the Crisis, Vibe and Steel were killed, and the team was left in shambles. Aquaman decided to disband the League.

Black Lantern Vibe!!! Make it happen!!!


127. The Hate Corps (21 points)

hatecorps.jpgBefore the Guardians of the Universe formed the Green Lantern Corps they employed a robotic army known as the Manhunters to police the 3600 sectors of space. Although a capable fighting force, the Manhunters were limited by their lack of emotion, most notably, compassion and empathy. This flaw would prove fatal when, for a still undisclosed reason, the Manhunters malfunctioned. This twisted programming would result in the Massacre of Space Sector 666; the worst mistake made by the Guardians since Krona first attempted his forbidden experiments. Reasoning that the best way to protect life from harm was to eliminate it, the Manhunters murdered billions of inhabitants of Sector 666 before they were stopped by their former masters. In the end, only five beings remained. These five christened themselves "The Five Inversions" and pledged revenge against the Guardians for the genocide perpetrated against Sector 666.

The Five Inversions operated as a terrorist organization, waging a private war against the Guardians. The Inversions utilized many weapons and were well versed in various forms of black magic, necromancy, and precognition. They became masters of deception and used the power of suggestion to sow fear and doubt in their enemies. At some point, the Inversions allied themselves with a group called "The Empire of Tears". While with the Empire, the Inversions faced off in what was to be their final battle with the Guardians.

The Guardians sought to eliminate or control all of the stray magic that permeated through the universe and give groups like the Inversions the power they needed to spread chaos. After a hellacious battle, the Guardians defeated the Empire of Tears and chained the Five Inversions to the planet Ysmault, where they were sentenced to spend an eternity crucified for their crimes. The Guardians then ordered Ysmault to be off limits to all travelers. Their desire to sequester the Inversions suggests that they were both punishing their enemies, and hiding away the last known witnesses to their greatest embarrassment. For centuries the Inversions languished on Ysmault, until one day the Green Lantern Abin Sur arrived on planet, in pursuit of a damaged star ship. The Inversion known as Qull toyed with Abin Sur, offering him the answer to any three questions he asked. Abin Sur used the first two questions to locate the damaged ship and save its lone survivor, but was tempted into asking a personal question about his fate and the fate of the Corps. Qull then recounted the prophecy of "The Blackest Night" a tale of the death of the universe when a force known as "The Black" will "one day consume all light and all life." As for himself, Abin Sur would die when his ring failed him at his greatest time of need, while he was fighting an opponent or unprotected in hard vacuum. Abin Sur would eventually become consumed with this prophecy; an obsession that would ultimately lead to his death.

The Guardians did not take Qull's manipulation of Abin Sur lightly. At one point the Inversions were lead to believe that they would be transferred off of Ysmault to a more traditional prison planet. Now thanks to Qull's perverted games, the Guardians abandoned this idea and left the Inversions to continue to rot for all eternity on Ysmault. Atrocitus, a powerful red skinned beast, was furious with Qull's carelessness. For years he had been experimenting with magics in an attempt to harness the red spectrum of light, and had finally unlocked its secret; blood. Atrocitus took his firsts steps towards forming the Red Lantern Corps when he bashed in Qulls head with his red lantern, anointing the lantern in the demons blood. Atrocitus would go on to bleed all of the Inversions. There on Ysmault, within a lake of blood, Atrocitus formed a Central Red Lantern that drew on the rage of the universe.

Red Lantern Corps was born.


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