Bumps, Pops, and Katie Vick 8/10/09

• on Monday, August 10 2009 and posted in Features

So ladies and gentlemen, how are we feeling about this little guest host gimmick that WWE has given to it's Monday Night Raw brand over the past month or so? Me, I'm feeling as though I genuinely WANT to enjoy it. It's something that would seem to spice up the altogether repetitive Raw product. However, I cannot bring myself to give a shit. It's not for the lack of WWE's trying either. I mean, they've gotten some very decent names to round out the shows. Guys like Shaquille O'Neal, Seth Green, and even ZZ Top have all come out to give hosting Raw a chance.

So why is it that I don't care? Well for one, aside from a possible follow-up on the Shaq/Big Show segment, it's clear that none of these guest hosts will have lasting repercussions on the overall program. We're not going to see Seth Green or Jeremy Piven repeatedly return and feud with a superstar, whether it be in or out of the ring. Therefore, it's almost as though each guest host is interchangeable with the one before them. I understand it's all in good fun and I'm expecting too much. I'm not saying I WANT them to do this, it's just my reasoning for not caring more, or having too much stake in it.

In my opinion, the best thing WWE could do is have more former/current-on-the-injured-list wrestlers host the show. So far, we've had HUSTLIN' Sr. and tonight we'll be getting MAGGOTS! to host the show. What I want to see is WWE really digging deep and bringing guys like Jake Roberts (he's sober at the moment, right?) back to reek havoc on the show. There's much more gold to be had that way. Think about a potential confrontation between someone like Roberts and Triple H. They were in WWF in the mid-90's around the same time I believe, but Roberts was in that awkward middle phase of your career when you're not a legend, but no longer a main-event caliber guy, and Aitch was just a snotty bitch. Triple H likes to be known as the Cerebral Assassin, but Roberts was the MASTER of the mind games in the late 80's WWF. Have Roberts come back as a heel and mentor the younger guys of Legacy, thereby allowing them to have one-ups on Triple Haitch's mind games now and again. However, the way you start this storyline is by bringing Roberts in as a guest host, and him confronting Triple H in some way. It's much easier to have a longer lasting story come out of a guest host role when the person has previously been involved with the business, and has a name for themselves within it.

Anyways, I'm done on that subject, so as I stated last time, I'm going to just ramble in one or two paragraph spaces about random things involving wrestling. Consider it like....a co-feature if you will. They're all the rage right now, and I was peer-pressured into it by....well, you know his name.

So am I the only one loving the fact that WWE has allowed CM Punk to FINALLY show his true ability on the mic? It's been no secret since he started that he has amazing ability in the ring, but when he plays the face, it's so hard to see how well he can do in other areas. However, anyone familiar with his pre-WWE work knows how well he plays the asshole straight-edge character. I myself don't drive or smoke, but I don't consider myself straight-edge (at least I don't refer to myself as it). Though with him starting to do this character again, I've begun to irritate my friends by cutting Punk-like promos on them when they're high/drunk. It's quite enjoyable, as most have no idea I'm just messing with them.

So TNA has just devolved into even more of a giant cluster-shit hasn't it? I haven't actually tried sitting through a whole show since that article I wrote a few months back, detailing it as it happened. I may have to give it another show, despite claiming never again. At least while writing the article I got a few good laughs out of just how bad the company has become. Yeah, you know what? I think I'm gonna do that. I don't think I have work on Thursday night anyways. So look forward to that article on Friday/Saturday sometime (if anyone actually READS my column anyways).

So it's 3:00AM here, and it's time for some goddamn bed, and I'll be writing another article this week anyways, so for now, grab me a winter coat, three pounds of pancake batter, and a big ol' spoon, and meet me at the North Pole. Now come along....FREEZY!

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