Wednesday, May 23, 2018 • Morning Edition • "For when you've got nowhere else to go."

Your Top Teens part 12

Written by Chris Mitchell on Thursday, October 01 2009 and posted in Features

We are almost at the Top 150. I can tell Twig is excited about this, his nipples are pointing at me. Eeeww.


158. Francis Otterman (14 points)

francisotterman.jpg"Snarky, computer savvy, and always looking for an edge, Francis is one of the funniest things about PVP!"

The youngest member of the staff. Technical support for the office (and also known to write the occasional review), he is currently working on a "he said she said" column with his girlfriend Marcy. Immature, easily excitable and always eager to be on the cutting edge of fads and technology, Francis represents every 'annoying gamer kid' stereotype. He loves his PC to an almost scary degree and routinely gets into arguments with Brent over Macs. Rarely does he show interest in anything besides computers or video games, though it has been stated that he owns a prominent collection of pony figurines. He could be considered a young genius because he works for a gaming magazine at the tender age of 16, but he claims he only took the job so he could play video games all day long. Also, Cole mentions that he knew Francis' mother from high school, so Francis' continued employment may be a favor on Cole's part. Francis' appearance in the comic has gone through the most changes. His first artwork was choppy and caused reader confusion due to readers mistaking a zit for his mouth and his mouth for a "jagged chin" or part of his hair, so his design was drastically changed later. For a long time he sported a T-shirt depicting a human skull, and messed-up moussed hair (the mousse was originally, and may still be, Skull's phlegm). He is rumored to be a "total Gaylord" (who collects pony statuettes) in the internet community due to a leakage on a Wiki article ostensibly by a close source (Marcy). Due to his recent consummation of his relationship with Marcy "predicted" in a previous comic strip, he "leveled up", aging three years and developing chin scruff. Soon after he decided to be "so over" his old giant-skull tee shirt and opted for a different black t-shirt, this time depicting a much smaller skull-and-crossbones logo. In a recent storyline, Brent passed the title of "Office Skeeve" to Francis.

157. Rage (14 points)

rage.jpgTwelve-year-old Elvin Haliday was visiting an unfamiliar neighborhood to trade some comic books with another boy when he was attacked by a gang of racist bullies. Elvin escaped them by hiding in the heavily polluted waters of Newtown Creek, but before he could climb out, Fisk Bio-chem workers dumped more illegal chemical waste into the creek, dousing him with it. Terrified and in pain, Elvin ran home to his only family, Granny Staples, and she nursed him back to health over a period of days. The boy recovered quickly, and in the weeks and months that followed, he went through a tremendous growth spurt that gave him a super-humanly powerful adult body. He was discouraged from seeking vengeance on his tormentors by the devoutly religious Granny Staples, who felt he should use his new powers for good. Fashioning a makeshift costume from a ski mask and a leather outfit, Elvin began operating as the super-vigilante Rage at the age of 14, targeting street criminals and drug dealers such as L.D. 50. He applied for membership in the Avengers, berating the team for their elitism and lack of visible minorities. Despite this obnoxious introduction, he was appointed a probationary Avengers reservist alongside Sandman after aiding the group in an other dimensional mission. Though technically part of a substitute roster serving as backup for the active team, Rage was a frequent participant in Avengers cases, facing foes such as Ngh the Unspeakable, the Tetrarchs of Entropy, Doctor Doom, the Brethren, the Collector, and Grotesk.

Rage left Camp Hammond with his old friend Justice to go and be a New Warrior again...only to learn there was a new team of Warriors already in place of the old ones. They re-united with Debrii and Silhouette along with some recruits from the Initiative (Slapstick & the Scarlet Spiders) to find Night Thrasher and confront him about creating a new team without attempting to recruit the original living members.

After the current New Warriors were disbanded at the conclusion of Secret Invasion, Justice's Counter Force became the New Warriors again. This time they are under the guidance of Norman Osborn's 50 State-Initiative.

156. Husk (14 points) husk.jpg

"In New Mutants, Sam Guthrie had a charming hillbilly quality to him, so it was very intriguing to see what direction Marvel would take his little sister in Generation X. Instead of more of the same 'aw, shucks', we got a hyper-ambitious spitfire of a girl that grabbed at every opportunity to rise above her situation. While Paige has interesting powers (tear your skin, get a new power), it's her personality that's even more interesting. Paige is a likeable version of Reese Witherspoon's character in "Election", whose ambition may get the better of her from time to time. And just when you thought Marvel had milked her character for all its worth, they had their bad boy Chuck Austen put her in a May-December romance with Angel/Warren Worthington III. (Well, more like April-December, as she had to be jailbait.) Some fanboys hated that arc, but it had so much potential. Was Paige's ambition pushing her to latch onto a rich pretty-boy for a meal ticket, or was there more beneath the surface--did she truly love him? We'll never know, but Paige is too good a character to stay in limbo forever."

Husk has the mutant ability to shed her outer layer of skin and reveal a new layer or shape underneath. While she can sometimes acquire new forms, Husk has been able to shift into anything that does not exceed her body mass. Any extra mass left when she shifts into a smaller form such as an insect or a bird is shunted into an unknown extra-dimensional space, and will return to Husk when she resumes her human form; Paige most commonly takes on a form similar to her human appearance but in a new material, which is something she prefers. She can become any solid that she has studied and has demonstrated the ability to imitate adamantium, diamond, granite, wood, rubber, brick, and even glass. She has the capability to blend in with surroundings, but in order to do so, she would have to study the texture she seeks to mimic first.

In the alternate timeline of the Age of Apocalypse she had much more control over her abilities and was able to shift into liquid substances, including complex acids capable of affecting organic steel, as well as having the ability to change to alter only one part of her body (such as changing one of her hands into a metallic bladed weapon).

When Paige morphs into a different layer, she often takes on new physical abilities or qualities, such as increased weight, strength, or invulnerability. She can husk away minor injuries, but deeper ones will stay with her. She can hold a form for about an hour before she needs to revert back to her original form. While she can continue to morph into new forms repeatedly, too many transformations in a short period of time can become very painful. In great stress or trauma, Paige can shed without control, revealing patchwork forms. When Paige ‘husks’, she sheds her clothing as well. This has the somewhat unfortunate side effect of leaving her nude when she returns to her normal form.

155. Kid Eternity (14 points)

kideternity.jpgDuring WWII, A boy and his grandfather were mistakenly killed by a Nazi Submarine. The grandfather died, but the boy was not meant to die for another 75 years. So, he was sent back to live the remainder of the life he was supposed to live as Kid Eternity, an agent of chaos. And because of the trauma of dieing, the boy could not remember his name, just that his grandfather always called him "Kid"

While Kid was dead, a spirit named Mr. Keeper approached him and gave him a unique power that he carried back with him to the living. By thinking their name and saying ETERNITY, the kid could summon forth the spirit on any historical figure.

It was later discovered that Kid's grandfather had always called him Kit, not Kid, and it was short for his full name: Christopher Freeman. Apparently, he and Freddy Freeman were brothers. Both being orphaned around the same time, one was given to each of their grandfathers.

The 1993 DC/Vertigo Kid Eternity comic was far darker and grittier than the older run. The story involved Kid Eternity using various angels and ghosts to help him locate the next Dalai Lama.

His next appearance would be his apparent death at the hands of Mordru in JSA #1 whose intention was to kill all agents of chaos. He also appears in a later issue of the Justice Society, though it is unclear whether it was his spirit or not. The Kid's next most recent appearance was in issue 31 of Teen Titans, where the kid was being used by the most recent incarnation of Brother Blood by being chained, and therefore holding open the doorway of life and death. Beast Boy unchains him from the door, freeing him.

Though he was free, it was unclear whether or not he was alive due to the fact that he had not been seen since, until Osiris mentions, on the pages of 52, that he had fought the keeper with the kid letting the reader know that he was in fact alive.

Kid Eternity next appeared in Teen Titans #68, where he helped a recently de-powered Red Devil figure out his contract in hell. Kid Eternity also quits as an Agent of Order. Following this mission, Kid Eternity becomes an official member of the Teen Titans. During his time with the Teen Titans, Kit didn't feel like he fit in with the team, as many of the other members asked him to bring back their dead loved ones. However Eternity and Wonder Girl do create a friendship. During the battle with the new Fearsome Five, Kid Eternity is kidnapped by the Calculator and is held hostage. In his incarceration, Kit is being forced to constantly bring Marvin White, the Calculator's deceased son and a former Teen Titan, back from the dead. Unluckily for Kid Eternity, the rest of the Teen Titans do not realize that he has been abducted but assumed that he quit the team.


Help spread the word, loyal readers! Share this story on social media:

Comment without an Outhouse Account using Facebook

We get it. You don't feel like signing up for an Outhouse account, even though it's FREE and EASY! That's okay. You can comment with your Facebook account below and we'll take care of adding it to the stream above. But you really should consider getting a full Outhouse account, which will allow you to quote posts, choose an avatar and sig, and comment on our forums too. If that sounds good to you, sign up for an Outhouse account by clicking here.

Note: while you are welcome to speak your mind freely on any topic, we do ask that you keep discussion civil between each other. Nasty personal attacks against other commenters is strongly discouraged. Thanks!
Help spread the word, loyal readers! Share this story on social media:

The Outhouse is not responsible for any butthurt incurred by reading this website. All original content copyright the author. Banner by Ali Jaffery - he's available for commission!