Friday, December 19, 2014 • Evening Edition • "For when you've got nowhere else to go."

Super Reads Siege & Realm of Kings 7

Written by SuperginraiX on Monday, April 26 2010 and posted in Features

Hey there!

Today, we check out Dark Avengers #14, Guardians of the Galaxy #23, and Blast to the Past for Avengers #400. Enjoy and spread the word!

Spoilers Ahead!


This week, we get a lot of former heroes going crazy for various reasons.

If this is your first time reading Super Reads, it's been around for a while, now! We've covered everything from Secret Invasion through Dark Reign as well as War of Kings. If you're interested in reading all that back story (and who wouldn't be?), check in the "Features" link at the top of the page, look for the "Super Reads" button and click away for DAYS of reading enjoyment. If that's too many clicks for you, just hit HERE and get there in one shot.

Asgard is burning but this Siege tie-in doesn't take place anywhere near there.

da14.jpgDark Avengers #14
Writer: Brian Michael Bendis
Penciler: Mike Deodato Jr.


Last issue, we actually took a trip back in time. WAY back in time. Around 1600 BC, Moses announced the tenth plague and dark spidery tendrils descended from the sky over ancient Egypt. We moved forward to the Sentry's first meeting with Norman Osborn and expanded the scene to include Ozzy giving Bob the super drug that originally gave him his powers. We moved even further forward to when Lindy shot the Sentry in the face with Captain Marvel's space gun. This time, we expanded the scene by having Lindy tell us exactly why she did it (because Bob was a drug addict who got his powers because he thought snorting strange science stuff would give him an amazing high) and stuck around for Bob's eventual resurrection. Sentry, or, rather, the Void wasn't happy to have been shot in the head and a personal battle between the Sentry and Void went on over killing Lindy. The Sentry tried throwing himself into the sun but that doesn't go over too well because he was pretty much unkillable. The Sentry and Void ended up making an agreement of sorts and return to earth with another scene of dark spidery tendrils spreading over New York City.

In this issue, Ms. Victoria Hand gets Norman to agree on seeing a psychotherapist. Ms. Marvel and Hawkeye make out in the Tower Meeting Room and Hand puts a halt to that, shooting Ms. Marvel with a super gun just to drive the point home. Sentry has a temper tantrum, using his newly discovered control of his personal reality to smash things all over New York City. While Iron Patriot takes to the skies to have a chat with the Sentry (actually, the Void), the Dark Avengers hit the streets to save lives. Bob calms down eventually. Norman gives Hawkeye the job of eventually assassinating Lindy Reynolds.


Three Days Ago. It's odd when a comic begins "three days ago." You've got to think: in the wacky world of comic book chronology, "three days ago" from when? With all the jumping around in time we did last issue, the situation is even more confusing. Some of the dialogue in this comic helps us out. This story happens after the Molecule Man storyline but before Siege: The Cabal. Or, three days ago.

Norman Osborn has been through a hell of a lot. He's been running nearly non-stop since the beginning of the Dark Reign. His mind was messed with on the molecular level by the Molecule Man. In short, he's been driven nuts. This might have been Loki's fault or Loki just helped push him over the edge but the end result is the same. That means that Ms. Victoria Hand, the Deputy Director of HAMMER, has her work cut out for her.

It's her job to bring her concerns to Norman Osborn and to make him listen. This time, she's brought him a list of psychotherapists to choose who's going to analyze his sanity. Osborn originally agreed to this but now flat out refuses to be involved. The fact that Tony Stark and Nick Fury submitted to psycho-analysis only solidifies his belief that he shouldn't get one done. After all, who got fired from the job of top cop? Was it Tony Stark and Nick Fury or was it Norman Osborn?

Hand isn't just going to take this from Ozzy. It's her job to stand up to him and make him do what is in the best interest of the country. Finally, Norman relents and tells Victoria to pick out a psychotherapist and he'll keep his appointment. Ms. Hand starts to tell Mr. Osborn why she's doing this but Norman cuts her off, assuming she's doing this out of respect for him. Victoria keeps going. She's doing this because she's afraid that Norman's going to revert to being the Green Goblin and kill a lot of people. She even suspects Norman is pushing himself so far just to help the Goblin come out and play.

This is something Victoria can't have. She believes in Norman Osborn and thinks that he's the nations last, best chance at a bright future. Still, the Dark Avengers have been through some tough battles. They have taken their toll.

And not every Avenger has Norman's best interests in mind. Take, for example, Karla Sofen. She's playing Ms. Marvel for Norman's Dark Avengers and, at the moment, she's playing WITH Hawkeye. The evil one. Right now. On the cameras. In the Avengers Tower Meeting Room surrounded by HAMMER security. Ms. Hand tells Norman that Sofen has been sleeping her way right through the Avengers line-up and it's not about sexual satisfaction. It's about undermining Norman's authority. Her actions have already led to Captain Marvel running off the team. Who knows what else she'll do unless someone puts her in her place?

Now, there's no argument from Ms. Hand about these being the right Avengers for the job. She doesn't really care about how ruthless they are or what they've done in their pasts. She actually thinks those are benefits to doing what needs to be done. That doesn't mean they should run around undisciplined. Norman tells Victoria to handle it how she sees fit. He'd do it himself but... well, he might kill someone before his psycho-analysis and that might not look good in the final grade. He also asks Ms. Hand to check in on Ares' plans for attacking Asgard. Hand KNOWS that Osborn doesn't have authority to lay siege to Asgard and calls Norman on this but she's lost her initiative. She leaves to handle Karla. Norman keeps staring angrily at the monitor showing Ms. Marvel and Hawkeye making out.

As far as makeout scenes, this is pretty tame. Both Hawkeye and Ms. Marvel are still fully clothed. Granted, those clothes are skin tight but the worst thing going on here is dry humping. Inappropriate? Yes. Full on sex scene? Nah.

Ms. Hand enters the room with an armed complement of HAMMER guards. She tells the two to stand down, for Karla to return to her quarters and for Lester to remain here. When Ms. Marvel starts copping an attitude at her superior officer, Victoria shoots her with a space gun. Those are popular in this comic. I doubt this one is a leftover from Noh-Vahr but, whoever supplied it, it does its job well, hurting Ms. Sofen even when she goes intangible. Ms. Hand orders the HAMMER guards to take the unconscious Avenger back to her room.

So what does she do with Hawkeye? Not much besides insulting him for playing right into Karla Sofen's plans. This wasn't his master plan to undermine Norman Osborn's authority, after all. For her words of insult, Lester tells Victoria that he's going to kill her in her sleep. This might not be an actual threat. This could be how Bullseye says hello. After all, he's threatened to kill quite a few people during the Dark Reign and most of them are still breathing.

Most of them...

Either way, Hawkeye killing Victoria Hand is about to be the least of her concerns. Sentry is about to have a temper tantrum all over New York City.

The question to ask is: why now? Oh, sure, with all the jumping around in time happening in this story (most of it last issue) we're led to believe that this happens right after his wife, Lindy, tried to kill him, but that's not accurate. Lindy tried killing him in Dark Avengers #9. Sentry's tantrum takes place after Dark Avengers #12. They've gone on the Molecule Man mission in the meantime. That means Sentry is having a spazz that isn't specifically related to being shot in the head by his wife.

But it's quite the hissy fit. After the Molecule Man mission, the Sentry discovered that his powers were similar to that of Molecule Man. He could control the molecules and shape his own world. Right now, he's using that ability to rain death down on New York City. Dark, spidery tentacles are descending from the sky as building explode from their touch.

The first to respond to the emergency is Iron Patriot. Note: I said "respond." Norman attacking the Sentry would be a very short battle. Ozzy is here to talk to his unstable Superman. The Sentry confronts him on the whole "there is no Void" thing. Obviously, there's a Void. The question Osborn has is: is there a Sentry? The superhuman in a Sentry suit responds that there is. Sentry's just not anywhere near in control at the moment.

Ms. Hand sends the Dark Avengers out for clean-up and rescue duties.
darkavengers14.jpg

OK, she just sends the other psychos out. Ares is probably still planning out Asgard scenarios and, truthfully, the god of war probably wouldn't be much good in rescue efforts. Honestly, I'm surprised these guys are going to be any good.

As the Dark Avengers try to save lives and Norman Osborn tries to talk the Void/ Sentry off the ledge, New York City is exploding. Norman wonders why the Void would choose this moment to go on a spree of destruction. We're probably not going to learn what triggered this specific breakdown but the Void just learned about these new powers so maybe it's as simple as that. He's been given the means to change his world so he's going to do so. The Void is making a world that will be inhospitable for his wife. He can't outright kill her (Sentry won't let him) so he's going to kill the world around her so that she'll go away.

Lindy Reynolds, eh? Norman decides that this is all her fault even though the Void claims it isn't. Still, Norman can't be too far off that she's a part of the problem. This is a big, destructive fit that, in Norman's mind, won't amount to anything. While he's up there reasoning with the Void, his Avengers are making good on saving lives. The Baxter Building takes a hit right in its center. The New Avengers' Spider-Woman and Spider-Man are seen helping to save people as well.

The Void doesn't like Norman's tone. Robert believes that Iron Patriot is trying to manipulate him and doing a sucky job to boot. Osborn claims that's the last thing he's trying to do. He's just trying to stop a friend from trying to commit suicide. Void almost laughs. Kill himself? If the Sentry can't kill him (and he tried last issue), who's going to do the deed?

Norman isn't going to do it. He doesn't even want to. Oz does give him a list of people who could probably give it the good college try. Reed Richards. Tony Stark. Doctor Doom. If the Void continues on this destructive path, Norman will step out of the way and let these people do what he couldn't.

The sky clears. The danger is over.

Norman tells the Void (and it IS still the Void-- note the black word balloons) that if this ever happens again, he won't step in and intervene when others try and take the Void down. More than that, Norman's Bob Reynolds' friend. He should go to Osborn before things ever get this bad again.

If the Void wants to channel that destruction, Norman will need his power later that night. Sounds to me like this will be the night of Siege: The Cabal.

Their gaze shifts the Avengers Tower and up the Watchtower to a window where Lindy Reynolds stares at both of them.

Before his meeting with the Cabal, Norman walks into Hawkeye's room. Lester asks him about what went on earlier that day and Norman only replies that it's taken care of. They have other matters to discuss and they don't even pertain to Bullseye's indiscretion with Karla Sofen that began the day. No, this is all about Lindy Reynolds. She needs to die.

gotg23.jpgGuardians of the Galaxy #23
Writers: Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning
Penciler: Wes Craig


Last issue, the Matriarch of the Church of Universal Truth did a little gloating and posturing over Moondragon and recieved some threats in return. Star-Lord teleported in for a rescue attempt and brought the entire Knowhere station with him for back-up. Cardinal Raker went one-on-one with Drax the Destroyer. Moondragon had a vision of her dead girlfriend, Phyla, who offered her some words of encouragement. Everone who had ever been a Luminal joined the rescue attempt. Cardinal Raker was killed by Drax. Moondragon was successfully rescued and, back on Knowhere, they were able to separate her from that evil monster life creature. The Guardians had a meeting with the Knowhere Administrative Council and avoided getting kicked off-station with some help from the Luminals. Groot threw the small slice of baby evil back into the Fault. Heather had a talk with her father and the two made plans to search out the fate of Phyla. The Matriarch of the Church of Universal Truth apologized to her master about failing to deliver baby evil into the world and we learned that Magus isn't dead and neither are the other presumed dead members of the Guardians!

In this issue, we back up in time to the moment where everyone thought that Magus and a number of the Guardians of the Galaxy were killed to learn what was really going on behind the scenes. Back in what passes for the present, Magus is having those presumed dead Guardians tortured into converting to his own personal religion. Magus tells Martyr his plans for universal domination through the spreading of the secrets of the all life dimension beyond the Fault. The presumed living Guardians are enjoying this "quiet" time by acting as Secret Service for the latest Galactic Council meeting. This includes being nice to King Blastaar. Martyr gets tortured at the hands of one of Magus' minions before joining Mantis, Cosmo, and Major Victory on the Astral Plane. They come up with a plan to contact Moondragon through Phyla. That goes down just as an assassin makes an attempt on Blastaar's life. Martyr finds herself free, does some killing, and frees her comrades.


Back in Guardians of the Galaxy #19, Magus ended up killing Martyr and followed that up with Gamora, Major Victory, Mantis, and Cosmo. Magus didn't last long after that. Star-Lord and a group of time displaced Guardians returned just in time to fight it out with Magus and end things permanent-like with a help of a fractured Cosmic Cube.

Obviously that's not how things actually went down. Let's take a look behind the scenes.

Alright, that's Martyr getting stabbed in the chest by Magus. Her spirit form rises into the air and she watches Gamora and Major Victory both fall, helpless to do anything about it. Soon, she's joined in the air by the spirits of those two and also Cosmo and Mantis. It's quite a party in the air. Mantis doesn't believe they're really dead so much that Magus is casting a spell of some sort. Faced with the threat of a Cosmic Cube, even one so fractured, has actually scared Adam Magus into running away. He's just gotta make it so that no one follows him.

And what's an easier way of doing that than making everyone think he's dead? Down below the "dead" Guardians, Magus reverts to Adam Warlock face just long enough to beg Star-Lord to shoot him. All part of the illusion. Even Star-Lord using the Cosmic Cube is all illusion.

Once everyone thinks Magus is dead, he covers his tracks even more. They fly up to the Church of Universal Truth's Templeships and Magus destroys them all in a chain reaction of their belief font. It's an incredible explosion that kills a LOT of people.

And now we return to the relative present to the homeworld of the Church of Universal Truth: Sacrosanct. This is the base of Adam Magus' power and well below in the catacombs, he keeps all his secrets hidden. The Guardians that were supposedly killed that day are as alive as Magus is. Not only that, but they are being tortured by Magus' best torturer, Flensse. All this torture is sort of a Spanish Inquisition type thing. They're trying to force the Guardians to convert and worship Magus as their god.

Their efforts are being focused on Martyr for a couple of reasons. First, Phyla is the agent of Death. Magus is the agent of Life. They're at polar opposites on the living/dead spectrum. Magus thinks that Martyr is definitely a downgrade from some of the other agents of Death but he works with what he's given. The more obvious reason is that Martyr, as the agent of Death, tried her best to kill Adam after he stopped the Fault from expanding. Having her worship him would be an awesome bit of win.

Because Flensse has been focusing on Martyr, the rest of the Guardians have been back burnered. Otherwise, there are many who would probably already have been turned. As it stands, the large amount of psychic energy residing in this particular group of Guardians has helped them resist up until now. Since he's having some frustration turning these enemies, Adam Magus lets loose with some taunting.
guardiansofthegalaxy23.jpg

He also monologues his way through his master plan. Remember that Fault thing? It is a gateway to a universe where life has won. Magus is the Avatar of Life so something like that is appealing to him even if the results seem to give us a cancerverse-type situation. Magus plans on going to this other world and bringing back with him the secrets of deathless life. Cancerverses all around!

This is completely the opposite of Marvel Zombies but just as creepy.

Having told these people his master plan, he lets Flensse go back to work. Magus has a date with the Fault.

Let's fly across the galaxy quickly and join up with the Guardians that are still out in the universe. After their latest adventure, they've found themselves on Ovar, the seat of the Galactic Council. The original Galactic Council was killed off by Vulcan before the onset of the War of Kings. The current version was brought together by Crystal who shows up to be congratulated by Star-Lord.

Moondragon is in charge of keeping this team communicating with each other. All those other telepaths have shuffled off this mortal coil (actually captured on Sacrosanct but no one out here knows that) and so Moondragon is doing it by herself despite still recovering from being host to the demon life creature for the last two issues.

After Crystal is paid her proper respect, King Blastaar shows up to get some respect of his own. The Ruler of the Negative Zone and the Kree Ceded Territories is working really hard to make this monarchy thing work for him and he's not above rubbing former aquaintances' faces in his divine right to rule. Not everyone thinks this is so awesome. The Guardians aren't that happy with Blastaar's attitude, for example. Also, high up in orbit and positioned on some random space debris, an assassin is training his weapon on Blastaar. No one likes Blastaar.

Back on Sacrosanct, Flensse is really torturing the hell out of Martyr. Phyla lasts only a little while longer before she slips into unconsciousness and back into her spirit form. Once she's up above her body, she joins in a psychic teleconference with Cosmo, Major Victory, and Mantis. Gamora isn't here and the others think she might have already been turned. Her teammates mention that she's got a strange resistance to this torture thing. They theorize that it's because Martyr is the Avatar of Death.

This is something she can work with. She isn't psychically shackled like the rest of them are. That means she can use her connection to her girlfriend (Moondragon) to tell them all about Magus still being alive and what his plans are. She just needs to focus.

Returning to consciousness, she focuses beyond the pain of being tortured to psychically grab onto Moondragon and give her as much warning as she can. On Ovar, Moondragon gets that message like a lightning bolt to the brain. She shouts out about an imminent danger and everyone thinks she's picked up something in the vicinity. Soon, that warning comes just as true. Three bullets hit the ground near Blastaar who is excited that anyone would want to kill him for his supposed power. Those bullets don't hit anyone. They don't have to. They transform into three monster things and continue to their intended target. Star-Lord starts shooting at them while Moondragon keeps on getting her message.

And it's a powerfully delivered message. Phyla tells her girl that she loves her before getting on to the pertinent information. Magus is alive. Star-Lord was tricked into believing that he killed Adam Magus. They need to prepare themselves.

With that done, Phyla needs to let Heather go and deal with more immediate problems. Flensse figures out that Phyla's doing some communicating with the outside world and calls some guards to make her stop. Martyr finds the sudden strength to break completely free from her chains and suddenly it's a party.

The Avatar of Death summons her sword and makes short work of the guards and Flensse. Phyla then uses the blade to free her companions. It's jailbreak time.

a400.jpgAvengers #400
Writer: Mark Waid
Penciler: Mike Weiringo


In this issue, Jarvis is visited by a time traveler from the future who tells him THIS IS THE DAY THE AVENGERS DIE! The Avengers run around New York fighting old menace after old menace while that time traveler gets Jarvis to remember old battles. New York slowly changes into a twisted version of itself as the Avengers fight on, realizing that their enemies are made up of the dark matter that is overtaking the city. Quicksilver, Hawkeye, and Black Widow are taken out of the fight by the Squadron Sinister and Crystal transports them to the hospital. The rest of the Avengers begins to be separated and overpowered by villains while, around the city and the world, former Avengers try to fight the expanding darkness. Jarvis figures out that this time traveler is, in fact, Loki pumping him for information and taunts the god of lies into revealing himself. The Avengers assemble at the Mansion to confront Loki and end up facing off against adamantium covered statues of the original Avengers. Wanda uses her hex power on the statues and the Avengers push the adamantuim results back into Loki, quick drying him into a statue of himself to be dealt with by Thor. The Avengers pat themselves on the back before being interrupted by X-Man.

Oh, man. The nineties. Look at the creators on this book. Mark Waid. Mike Wieringo. These guys are awesome and yet they are also responsible for Avengers #400. Now, I don't know how much you can even blame those creators for this thing. After all, Mark Waid was taking over writing duties after Bob Harras and Terry Kavanagh left the title post Crossing. It's not like they had a lot to work with. They weren't responsible for Teen Tony. They weren't responsible for bug-girl Wasp. They certainly didn't have a lot to work with and they didn't have the time to build up to an awesome event of their own because in two issues, the title would be restarting with a brand new number one under the helm of Rob Liefeld. The next two issues would be Onslaught tie-in issues leading to that changeover.

This meant that this very special anniversary issue had to be a one-off story with no altering of the current status quo. That must have been frustrating for Mark Waid who also lost the Captain America title to the changeover. So, with those constraints in place, the four hundredth anniversary issue became a throwaway story about the Avengers refacing all their old foes. It was a celebration of their villains. Naturally, Loki had to be involved.

Our issue starts out innocently enough. Edwin Jarvis, tired of all his butlering duties, is out in Avengers Park sweeping up the path in front of that big statue dedicated to the Avenger Founders. Suddenly, a man appears nearby in a temporal explosion and Jarvis rushes in to offer what aid he can. It turns out that this man is a time traveler named Tyfon and he's here to save the Avengers!

Tyfon runs out of Avengers Park with Jarvis trailing behind him. They both head to Avengers Mansion. Tyfon is intent on warning the Avengers of an impending threat but the Avengers are already all out dealing with super villains.

For example, Quicksilver, Scarlet Witch, Crystal, and the Vision or fighting it out with some of the original Masters of Evil (Black Knight, the Melter, and Radioactive Man). Once they've defeated these foes, they enjoy the adulation of the crowd and are kind of amused by it. After all, two of these people are mutants, feared and hated for a genetic trait. Crystal is an Inhuman. Vision is a synthezoid. None of them strictly human, all of them loved.

They move in to take their unconscious enemies into custody only to watch as the Masters' bodies change into some sort of dark matter. As they look on, they notice that the city itself is being altered by this same dark matter stuff.

In another part of town, Iron Man, Captain America, and Hawkeye are facing off against the Living Laser and get the same result. This time, LL shatters into dark matter after being kicked by Hawkeye. Things are getting eerie for earth's mightiest heroes.

Back at Avengers Mansion, Tyfon is explaining the story to Jarvis. This very day, the Avengers will face a threat from their greatest villain of all and will fall before him/her/it. The world will be covered in shadow matter that will be fought against even in Tyfon's day. The big problem with all of this is that no-one in the future knows what villain they actually faced this day. It's up to Jarvis to figure it out.

Tyfon hands the butler a futuristic device that will help extract Jarvis' memories. Jarvis has to remember every villain the Avengers faced until they figure out who is responsible for the DAY THE AVENGERS DIED. The early history of the Avengers is well recorded so Jarvis needs to start not at the beginning but later on in Avengers history. While Jarvis is remembering, Tyfon is watching the Avengers throughout the city.

Thor, Giant-Man, the Wasp, and the Black Widow, for example, are watching a miniature version of the Kree-Skrull War playing out on the streets of New York. While they attack that threat, Giant-Man is confronted by a combination of Kang the Conqueror, Rama-Tut, Scarlet Centurion, and Immortus. At the time, they were all considered to be the same dude during different times. The combination time traveler hits Hamk pym with a chronal punch that makes Hank's life pass before his and the rest of the Avengers' eyes. We see Hank shift from Giant-Man to Yellow-Jacket, to Goliath, to Ant-Man and then back to Giant-Man. Thor shatters the Kang/Rama/Scarlet Centurion/Immortus being with his hammer and it reverts to dark matter just like the Kree and Skrulls.

The Avengers have all rallied together at this point. It's just in time because they're facing off against the Squadron Sinister next! These guys were Marvel versions of DC's main heroes (only EVIL!) so you've gotta have the whole team together for this fight. It's also where the Avengers suffer their first injuries because we all know that Mark Waid is a DC man. :P Hawkeye and Black Widow are downed by Hyperion. Quicksilver is sucker punched by the Whizzer. The rest of the Avengers take up defensive postures while Crystal takes the injured to a hospital. They're down four Avengers in so few minutes.

They never beat the Squadron Sinister. Those enemies are reformed by the shadow matter and replaced by lava men. This might be seen as a downgrade but it's a LOT of lava men. The Avengers are now seriously outnumbered and the chaos continues.

Back at Avengers Mansion, Jarvis is being taxed to remember a lot of past battles in a short amount of time. When he tries to start things at the beginning and go through them chronologically, Tyfon gets agitated and says he's already studied the beginning. Jarvis needs to move on before the Avengers and the world are destroyed. On his wrist monitor, a dark matter version of Ultron has entered the battle and is attacking Iron Man.

Things are moving swiftly now. The Avengers are finding themselves separated on the battlefield. Big name villains like Ultron, Grim Reaper (in a stylish hood and cape), and Count Nefarius are now being created by that shadow matter. These are backed up by some of the lesser known villains. The results are a separated team where no one is backing anyone else up.

All over the world, former Avengers are fighting off the spread of shadow matter or at least fearing for the future. We get cameo shots of Spider-Man (Ben Reilly), three of the Fantastic Four (Reed, Sue, and Ben-- Johnny hasn't been an Avenger), Black Panther, Namor, and She-Hulk. This shows us that not only New York is being attacked. This threat is world wide and our heroes are losing.

Back in the Mansion, Jarvis is watching his friends and teammates fall. Everytime he tries to go back to the beginning, Tyfon gets progressively angrier. Soon, Jarvis has figured this whole thing out. He starts talking about how weak the Avengers' first villain was and how the Avengers were embarrassed that their formation was tied in to the machinations of such an easy threat. This is enough to enrage Loki into revealing himself.

Yeah, Tyfon wasn't from the future at all. That was Loki doing that mischief that he does so... well? Well, he seems to enjoy himself at least.

The device helping Jarvis pour through his memories changes back into whatever beast it actually is before slipping off Jarvis' arm. Loki has all the information he needed anyway. With a backhand, he sends the Avengers' butler sliding across the floor. Jarvis isn't a threat anyway.

Or... IS he? Jarvis hasn't stopped fighting. Pulling out his Avengers ID Card, he hits it close to center and activates a priority alert signal telling the Avengers to return to the Mansion. The Avengers still standing get that signal and don't even think twice. They abandon whatever foe they're facing off against and head straight home.
avengers400.jpg

What they find there is, of course, the true threat. It's a giant-sized Loki with a shadow matter dimensional doorway in his chest. Loki explains that very soon, this world will be overrun with shadow matter. Once that's done, Loki will rule the universe from earth. Or something. The point is it's a big threat and the Avengers might have to do some Assembling to stop it.

Loki isn't done fighting himself. As usual, he fights through proxy. This time, he brings that founding member statue display alive and sets the Statue Avengers against the current line-up. Just like those dark matter villains, the statue Avengers have their individual powers. They also have a trump to that: the statues are coated in adamantium. This might seem like a waste of good adamantium since you could probably cover 200 Wolverine skeletons with the adamantium used here but... well, it makes them a bigger threat that they just can't shatter into pieces.

The true threat, of course, isn't those Statue Avengers. It's Loki and that shadow dimension portal growing in his chest. They need to get through the statues quickly so they're going to have to chance Wanda using her hex powers. Unfortunately, the result is just changing the adamantium from statues of Avengers into a blob of metal that still tries to attack the real Avengers. Amused, Loki tries to get the adamantium to cover the Avengers so he'll have his very own statues for posterity.

The Avengers fight back, blasting the adamantium blob with an assortment of their available powers until the mass is forced back onto Loki. It covers not only the god of lies but that shadow dimensional portal on his chest. That means the threat is ended and they have a statue of Loki to boot! It's win/win.

Thor tells everyone that he'll deal with his adamantium covered brother in due time. Crystal calls in and tells the Avengers that their injured are doing fine. They'll be ready for duty by tomorrow at the latest. Cap tells the team just how great they did and the congratulate Jarvis on figuring out the threat and summoning them home to deal with it. This was one of their toughest battles ever and they one by fighting it together.

While everyone is patting themselves on the back, there's a knock at the door. Jan goes to answer it and we find that X-Man, sparking with energy, is paying the Avengers team a visit. It seems good ol' Charlie Xavier has gone quite mad and that the Avengers need to deal with the X-Men Founder before the whole world is forfeit.

Ah... just another day in the life of the Avengers. :)

And we are done! One quick and sweet article!

Until next time: Who Do YOU Trust?

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About the Author - SuperginraiX


SuperginraiX is the biggest sap on The Outhousers' payroll (wait, we get paid?). He reads every issue of every crappy Marvel crossover so you don't have to. Whats worse is that he pays for his books, thus condoning Marvel's behavior. If The Outhouse cared for his well being at all, they'd try and get him into some sort of rehab center. But, alas, none of us even know how to say his name. For a good time, ask Super why Captian America jumped off the Helicarrier in Fear Itself. Super lives in the frozen wastland that is Minnesota with 15% of the state's population living under his roof: a wife he makes wear an Optimus Prime mask, two gremlins, and his mother-in-law.

 


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