Tuesday, July 14, 2020 • R.I.P. Edition • Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke.

What If…?! The Avengers Film....

Written by 365Dom on Wednesday, April 25 2012 and posted in Features
I've got a feeling... that I am WATCHING you!The Outhouse plays Watcher with the upcoming Avengers film!

Don't mind me.

What If...?! The Avengers Film

With Marvel's The Avengers film right around the corner I am absolutely geeking-out over what can possibly be in the soon to be released blockbuster. I have a few ideas of scenes that could actually be in the film, but I thought it might be more fun to daydream about scenes that would most likely not be in the film.

What If...These 5 Scenes Were in The Avengers Film?!

It's cameo time!  Also clobberin' time.

5. What if the Fantastic Four's Ben Grimm (the Thing) makes a cameo appearance?
I know, I know...due to the Fantastic Four movie rights not being held by Marvel, Fantastic Four characters cannot be used in The Avengers. But what if they could?! It would make for a wonderful wink-wink moment when the Ever-Lovin' Blue-Eyed Thing does a double take when first seeing Captain America. I can hear the Thing's line now. "Do I know...nah! Couldn't be." A little joke about the use of the same actor as two different Marvel characters could be a nice moment. I'd smile.

Fear Itself is at least good for it's images.

4. What if Captain America picks up Thor's hammer, Mjolnir?
In the midst of battle, Thor falls and drops his hammer. Cap looks around and notices all of the Avengers have fallen with only himself left standing against a horde of baddies. Courageous as always, Cap is determined to fight to the end, so he reaches down and grabs the most powerful weapon on the battlefield...Mjolnir! Cap proceeds to lay down the smack. All of this happens in slow-mo, by the way. Hmm, this actually sounds like it could happen! But probably not.

They're actually playing Phase 10.

3. What if there was an Avengers and "friends" poker night scene?
Maybe the scene could focus on the end of the night where only the Avenger guys are left at the table but there are claw marks on one part of the table and some cards stuck together with webs. Hawkeye can talk about what a sore loser the fury guy is and how the other dude just won't shut-up. Or maybe something could be said about the "Terrible Two" referring to the Human Torch and the Thing and their poor card play. Basically, I just want to see one of the guys with a goofy card dealer hat on. Preferably the Hulk.

If he appeared with the mustache, they get bonus points.

2. What if Tony Stark almost hires a butler named Watson...played by Jude Law?
Pepper tells Tony that she has been too busy and that Tony needs to hire a butler to look after his place for him. She tells Tony that she has taken the liberty of calling in an applicant named Watson for an interview. Pepper lets in Jude Law. Very quickly Stark steps over to him and says, "I deduce... you are to be my butler?" Before Watson can say anything (literally just opening his mouth to reply) Stark continues on "...we'll let you know." Stark then quickly walks off.

1. What if the credits scene involves a slightly aged Cap crashing into Tony's house, while driving a DeLorean?
Cap comes stumbling out of the car and looks to be just hanging onto life. Stark kneels over to Cap and asks, "Steve, what happened?" Cap responds, "...he's coming...we're all doomed..." To which Stark responds, "Steve... Who...?" Cap is then blasted to ash. Tony leaps backwards and looks up. A slow pan up reveals the villain set for the next Avengers film (hopefully). Kang the Conqueror simply says, "Me."

Because time travel makes everything better.  Or more confusing.  Whatever.

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