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Patrick Stewart And The Kobayashi Time Warner

Written by xaraan on Thursday, September 20 2012 and posted in News with Benefits
Patrick Stewart And The Kobayashi Time Warner

"All I wanted to do was set up a new account with Time Warner Cable but 36hrs later I’ve lost the will to live.”

Source: NY Post

   Patrick Stewart tasted the bottom of TIme Warner's boot this week in a foolish attempt to set up the cable service in his new pad in New York and become their customer.  Thirty Six hours after they were supposed to provide him with service, his will was broken.  "Alright, Alright, Enough!" Stewart pleaded, "There are five lights!"

   His twitter account, which had only 58 posts (as of press time), exploded with over 1300 retweets of his cable company woes.  The Twitter noise became so embarrassing for Time Warner that they attempted to reach out to Stewart.  Unfortunately unable to hail him on the main viewer.. realizing that his big screen would have to actually have service first, they finally tweeted him, "@SirPatStew I apologize for the frustration.  If you change your mind we are here. ^SS"


   A Time Warner Spokesman, cornered while leaving a Star Wars convention we imagine, responded, "there's no doubt we have a lot of fans at the company of the actor and Star Trek in general, but truth is, any customer that reaches out to us... we're going to help in the exact same way." After running his statement through the Universal Translator, we got: "All our customers will be treated like crap equally."



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About the Author - Jeremy Shane

Jeremy was born in a small mountain village of a strange foreign land called Weystvurginea.  Banishment for liberal views saw him spend years wondering the east coast until he decided to bike to California.  When he saw how long a trip it was, he drove instead.  Now he's living it up in a low humidity climate, sometimes working on his photography and when not, he writes for us covering books (by way of his blog: Reading Realms), gaming, tv, movies, comics, conventions in the SoCal area, and creates a weekly webcomic: A Journey Through Skyrim.  If you look for him offline, start in the L.A. area; online start at: for his profile and all the social networks he's on... or just follow him on twitter, he seems to be on there a lot: @jeremyshane.


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