James Gunn Apologizes, Gives Hit Seeking Websites One More Opportunity to Say "Superhero Sex Blog" in Title
Site runners will no longer be able to use the search engine friendly phrase in the titles of quickly written news articles.
Source: ThanosCopter News Wire
Shameless website owners were distraught to learn that James Gunn, director of the upcoming Guardians of the Galaxy movie and Internet villain, has apologized for a sophomoric blog post entitled "Fifty Superheroes You Want to Have Sex List".
Since the blog post was noticed two days ago, hundreds of sites had jumped on the opportunity of using the search engine friendly phrase "superhero sex blog" in multiple articles and seeing site traffic jump significantly.
By apologizing for the two year old post and admitting that it was unfunny, the director effectively stopped siterunners from inserting the phrase "superhero sex blog" into future news articles, robbing them of thousands of google hits from perverts seeking actual superhero sex blogs.
"NOOOOOOOOOO!" said Ernest McGuillicutty, owner and chief blogger of the site Comicbooks.org, "I had at least a dozen articles lined up that liberally used the phrase "superhero sex blog" and loudly criticized Gunn for his wholly tasteless actions. Damnit, I have bills to pay!"
Madeline van Horterschnout held back tears as she deleted the unpublished article "Why Does James Gunn Like Superhero Sex Blogs So Much? Is He a Superhero Sex Blog Addict?" from her site, Marvelsuperheromovies.net. "This is pretty tragic," she admitted.
However, not all siterunners were upset. "Frankly, I don't think he went far enough in his apology," said Art Vanderbilt of the site Hollywoodsuperheroes.ru. "We're running a 'Why did James Gunn Not Apologize for His Superhero Sex Blog Sooner' article now, a 'Anyone Who Writes a Superhero Sex Blog Should Be Castrated and Sent to Siberia' in an hour and a 'I'm Still Really Offended by James Gunn's Superhero Sex Blog' this afternoon. We'll probably follow that up with a Top Ten List of 'The Worst Superhero Sex Blogs' of all time this weekend."
Meanwhile, Jude Terror of the Outhouse had a different plan. "I'm trying to find pictures of Joss Whedon in a dress," he said. "Strictly for hit purposes mind you, and not at all for my own enjoyment."
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About the Author - Christian Hoffer
Christian Hoffer is the exasperated Abbott to the Outhouse's Costello. When he's not yelling at the Newsroom for upsetting readers or complaining to his wife about why the Internet is stupid, he sits in his dingy business office trying to find new ways to make the site earn money. Hoffer is also the only person in history stupid enough to moderate two comic book forums at once.
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