Iron Man to do Battle with Thighmaster in Age of Ultron
- Written by Jude Terror on Thursday, January 24 2013 and posted in News and Satire
Despite an attempt to cover it up by adding molded muscles to the Iron Man suit, Tony Stark has added at least 25 pounds per thigh in the latest Age of Ultron teaser.
Source: Marvel's Facebook
After decades of being unable to defeat the Avengers, the villainous Ultron appears to have enacted his most dastardly scheme yet in the latest Age of Ultron teaser from Marvel Comics: taking away the Avengers' advantage by turning them into fat fucks. Observe this just-released image of Tony Stark, who seems to have gained at least 50 pounds, all of it in his thighs. Stark's left thigh is easily as thick as his waist, close to Liefeldian proportions. Stark has attempted to hide his unseemly weight gain by creating a new Iron Man suit with built-in muscles, but not even molded metal can cover up those tremendous thunder thighs.
You can tell that Stark is uncomfortable in the suit, as he seems to be experiencing a moment of doubt, hesitating before firing his repulsor rays. Stark was probably embarrassed when the extra weight from his humongous thighs crushed in the roof of the car he's standing on. Poor Tony. This is going to wreak havoc on his playboy lifestyle. Chicks don't like fatties.
Age of Ultron hits stores in March, but be careful to read in moderation, ladies, lest the issues go straight to your hips.
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About the Author - Jude Terror
Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably.
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