Friday, April 20, 2018 • Evening Edition • "Still Kardashian free!"

DC Shocker: All DC Creative Teams to Be Decided by Musical Chairs

Written by Jude Terror on Wednesday, March 20 2013 and posted in News with Benefits

DC Shocker: All DC Creative Teams to Be Decided by Musical Chairs

A new DC Comics policy will bring more logic and stability to the company's creative decisions.

Source: ThanosCopter Newswire

With all of the creative team shakeups at DC lately, many readers have been feeling overwhelmed. Not knowing who is going to be writing the books, or worse, thinking that we know and then having it change before the first issue even hits the stands, makes it difficult for readers to make decisions about which books to follow. In fact, some might say it's easier to just stop reading DC books altogether.

Well, DC executives have heard these complaints, and they have a solution: Musical Chairs.

In most circumstances, the popular children's party game, in which participants dance around a group of chairs, one less than the number of players, in a circle until music stops playing, forcing them to fight for a seat to remain in the game, would be considered a relatively unstable method of making any kind of decision. However, compared to DC's current strategy, it will run like clockwork.

"We wanted to go with a strategy that would be less chaotic," said DC editor in chief Bob Harras. "So rather than randomly pissing off our creators with ridiculous editorial changes or firing them via email, we're going to let the teams be decided by a musical chairs."

"We put a lot of thought into this," he continued. "We considered Hot Potato, Rock Paper Scissors, and even Pin the Tail on the Publicly Fired Creator."

"Ultimately, we found Musical Chairs to be the most effective way to determine a creative team," Harras concluded.

When we suggested that careful planning based on performance, ability, and the specific needs of the properties might be a better solution, Harras just stared at us blankly, and proceeded to scroll through a selection of catchy tunes on his iPod before deciding on "Pop Goes the Weasel" as the best song for the game.

According to sources inside the troubled comics publisher, the games will take place each month, with anywhere from one to five creators being replaced with every issue.

"Damn!" exclaimed superstar artist and bleeding heart liberal Ethan Van Sciver after being beaten out for the last seat by a surprisingly agile Scott Lobdell in the latest round of changes. "I was really getting into my work on Batman: The Dark Knight. Oh well. This will give me more time to argue on Facebook."

Van Sciver's departure will be announced next week on Bleeding Cool., while Lobdell will continue to write approximately 40% of DC's monthly comics.

For fans, the decision is a huge relief.

"Finally, some stability," sighed Elizabeth Brandes, a DC Comics reader from Phoenix, AZ. "Well, more stability. I look forward to being able to read up to two continuous issues by a single creative team on a DC Comic book."

"It will be strange," she added, "but in a good way. Like 'Grant Morrison's Batman strange,' as opposed to 'Morrison's Action Comics strange.'"

For more information on DC's musical chairs, see our articles on Andy Diggle's departure from Action Comics, Tony Daniel's taking over the writing chores on Action Comics, and Joshua Hale Fialkov's departure from Green Lantern Corps.


Help spread the word, loyal readers! Share this story on social media:

Comment without an Outhouse Account using Facebook

We get it. You don't feel like signing up for an Outhouse account, even though it's FREE and EASY! That's okay. You can comment with your Facebook account below and we'll take care of adding it to the stream above. But you really should consider getting a full Outhouse account, which will allow you to quote posts, choose an avatar and sig, and comment on our forums too. If that sounds good to you, sign up for an Outhouse account by clicking here.

Note: while you are welcome to speak your mind freely on any topic, we do ask that you keep discussion civil between each other. Nasty personal attacks against other commenters is strongly discouraged. Thanks!
Help spread the word, loyal readers! Share this story on social media:

About the Author - Jude Terror

Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably. A certified trash eater ruining the pristine field of comics journalism with his sarcasm and goofiness, Jude Terror is secretly friendly and congenial, so if you've got a complaint, why not just bring it up to him instead of subtweeting like a jackass, jackass? You can find him on Twitter or try your luck with an email, but keep in mind that he is notoriously unreliable and may not get back to you right away. Unless you want to send him free stuff, in which case he'll get back to you immediately.

More articles from Jude Terror
The Outhouse is not responsible for any butthurt incurred by reading this website. All original content copyright the author. Banner by Ali Jaffery - he's available for commission!