Marvel and Disney unveiled a new Iron Man 3 themed monorail which will run at the Walt Disney World resort this summer. The monorail will feature Iron Man on one side and Iron Patriot on the other.
"Well, sir, there's nothing on earth like a genuine, bona fide electrified, six-car monorail," said a Disney spokesperson when asked why the company was promoting the movie on a such a limited mode of transportation.
"I hear those things are awfully loud," said one skeptical bystander.
"It glides as lightly as a cloud," replied the spokesperson.
"Is there a chance the track could bend?" asked an Indian tourist, referring to the monorail being weighed down by the new paint scheme.
"Not a chance, my Hindu friend," replied the Disney spokesperson.
"What about us brain dead slobs?" said a drunken passerby.
"You'll all be given cushy jobs," said the spokesperson, noting that the new monorail will create new jobs.
"Were you sent here by the Devil?" said another bystander, referring to Disney's alleged ties to Satan.
"No, good sir, I'm on the level," stated the spokesperson. The spokesperson then led the crowd into a frenzied chant of "Monorail, Monorail, Monorail!"