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Bleeding Cool Article Links Costumed Panhandling Law to Orwellian Dystopia

Written by Jude Terror on Friday, April 12 2013 and posted in News with Benefits

Bleeding Cool Article Links Costumed Panhandling Law to Orwellian Dystopia

In a particularly melodramatic moment for the gossip website, Bleeding Cool has suggested a new law targeting costumed panhandlers in Times Square will criminalize cosplay at New York Comic Con.

Source: Bleeding Cool

Costumed weirdos who dress up as Sesame Street characters and beg people to give them money in Times Square were all over the news this week when a Cookie Monster shoved a two year old child after the child's mom did not give him the expected tip (presumably, a handful of chocolate chip cookies that he could humorously crumble into his puppet mouth). Buried somewhere in a Daily News article sourced by Bleeding Cool is the idea that maybe New York City will introduce some kind of law that regulates the costumed panhandling. Rumormonger in Chief and possible muppet fetishist Rich Johnston has taken this to mean that cosplay will be banned from New York Comic Con in this article titled "Could Cosplay Be Banned For New York Comic Con?"

"The sky's falling, it is!" shouted a panicking Johnston, dressed as a sexy version of popular children's character Mary Poppins, when he first learned of the news. "It's a bloody shame, I say, pip pip!'

Being dutiful journalists who would never use a sensational headline to attract unique hits, The Outhouse investigated these claims (we browsed the pictures in the Daily News article until we became distracted) and we are taking the position that Johnston's claims are blown out of proportion, and that cosplayers at Comic Con will be perfectly safe from prosecution from the NYPD, though they live their lives in constant danger of a run-in with the fashion police.

If you're worried about your rights to cosplay being infringed upon, however, you should certainly feel empowered to do something about it. We recommend posting pictures of Willy Wonka (Gene Wilder version, of course) with sarcastic phrases about cosplay naziism written on them in bold Arial font, as this is a surefire strategy to change the world, or else everyone I know on Facebook is doing it wrong. To really ensure the campaign is a success, you could vaguely insult all your friends by implying that anyone who doesn't share your post is a racist homophobe who clubs baby seals with other baby seals.

"Bleeding Cool will keep our readers updated on this story, we will," Johnston promised before extending a a black umbrella and floating off into the skies.

Goodbye, Rich Johnston. Don't stay away too long.


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About the Author - Jude Terror

Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably. A certified trash eater ruining the pristine field of comics journalism with his sarcasm and goofiness, Jude Terror is secretly friendly and congenial, so if you've got a complaint, why not just bring it up to him instead of subtweeting like a jackass, jackass? You can find him on Twitter or try your luck with an email, but keep in mind that he is notoriously unreliable and may not get back to you right away. Unless you want to send him free stuff, in which case he'll get back to you immediately.

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