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Boring Weekend Of Boringness Confronts Outhouse Staff

Written by GHERU on Monday, April 22 2013 and posted in News with Benefits

Boring Weekend Of Boringness Confronts Outhouse Staff

Did anything interesting happen this weekend? The answer will bore you.

Source: RU is really bored

THE INTERNET – Hot off the heels of a spectacularly uneventful week, the writing staff of The Outhouse - the internet’s first, best, and only destination for quality Dilbert analysis – was dismayed at what they found waiting for them in their mailboxes on Monday morning:

“THAT’S IT?” screamed Outhouse webmaster, Jude terror, “Dark Horse announces its 2E2 2013 schedule! Whoopdee-fucking-doo!”

“What the bloody Hell is a Arts & Entertainment fact checker? How do you fact check art?” asked GHERU (RU).

“Well, the Boston ComicCon was canceled, I’m sure there would have been more had it gone ahead.” Christian Hoffer (Blue) , Outhouse EIC, in an attempt to be a much needed voice of reason/

“Then the terrorists have won!” laughed both RU and Jude as they joked in unison.

“It’s that kind of humor that makes it necessary to keep you two in line. You’re going to get us on a list someday!” Blue scolded. “Ok, now what?”

Jude: Age of Ultron sucks

Blue: Water is wet

RU: I’m going to beat that horse dead at the end of the event.

Jude: RU, you need to stop taking these things so personally, let it go


Blue: Azrael’s back in Batman Inc

RU: Who?

Jude: What?

RU: I saw something about monkeys from Greg Pak in the inbox, anything there?


RU: You can’t eat them.


Blue: That’s for Royal, he gave Mr. Pak some good head to be on that list, let him have it. Also, Royal will treat it with respect; you don’t want the wrath of whatshisname down on us, do you?

Jude: Simian?

Blue: Yea. The last time we made fun of a monkey, Simian didn’t talk to me for weeks, instead he had J.M. Hunter pass along any message. Fate worse than death.

Jude: I want to pick a fight with the white knight brigade?

Blue: Over?

Jude: Animal rights and my desire to eat a monkey.

Blue: No, just, no.

RU: We could point out the ineptitude of DC.

Blue: It is Monday…but no, NOTHING happened, we’d just look to be a week late like Fuck it, RU go make something up, we just need to publish something, no one has to actually read it.

RU:…thank you?

[Xaraan walks in]

Xaraan: Morning everyone, anything to write up?

[everyone else leaves room]

Xaraan: Hello? Anyone? 


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About the Author - GHERU

RU, or as he’s known in the writers’ room: the cute one, is relatively unappreciated in his time.  RU’s YouTube show, RUviews is watched by literally multiple people every month and his Outhouse articles have helped line many a bird cage.  Before you send RU a message, he knows that there are misspelled words in this article, and probably in this bio he was asked to write.  RU wants everyone to know that after 25+ years of collecting he still loves comic books and can’t believe how seriously fanboys take them.  RU lives in Akron Ohio (unfortunately) with WIFE, ‘lilRuRu, and the @DogGodThor.  You can also find him on Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, & even Google+ (if anyone still uses that).


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