An EA press release announced today that Electionic Arts, universally considered to be the worst video game company in existence, has been contracted to produce several years worth of video games based on the Star Wars franchise. The move is bewildering to Star Wars fans and video gamers, who generally despise EA for it's despicable DRM practices, greedy use of microtransactions, and continuous release of the exact same sports games every single year with no notable enhancements other than a new roster. However, Disney executives claim there is a method to their madness.
"LucasArts put a lot of effort into making the best Star Wars games possible," said a top Disney executive. "And look how that worked out for them. So we decide to go in the opposite direction, and decided to purposely try to make bad games."
"It's a realistic goal," the executive concluded.
Earlier this year, and we swear we're not making this up, it was announced that EA had won the award for worst company of 2012, it's second consecutive win. The contest includes all companies, not just video game companies. To put things in terms Star Wars fans can understand, EA is the Jar Jar Binks of video game companies.
"Deesa project weel be a beegah failure dan the construcshon of dee death staa! Mui bombad!" commented a representative from EA. The company went on to say that, when it comes to making video games, they like to shoot first, "like Greedo."
EA hopes that Star Wars fans, used to being bilked for every cent they have, will be receptive to the company's restrictive DRM and excessive microtransactions. We reached out to EA for further comment, but no one was available at the company. However, The Outhouse was able to obtain exclusive video footage from EA's corporate headquarters at Pismo Beach from immediately after the deal was announced:
Here's the press release:
The Walt Disney Company and EA Announce Multi-Year Star Wars Games Agreement
Deal will bring new Star Wars games to fans across the most popular gaming genres and platforms.
BURBANK & REDWOOD CITY, Calif.--(BUSINESS WIRE)--The Walt Disney Company (NYSE: DIS) and Electronic Arts Inc. (NASDAQ: EA) today announced a new multi-year exclusive licensing agreement to develop and publish globally new games based on Star Wars characters and storylines.
Under the agreement, EA will develop and publish new Star Wars titles for a core gaming audience, spanning all interactive platforms and the most popular game genres, while Disney will retain certain rights to develop new titles within the mobile, social, tablet and online game categories.
“This agreement demonstrates our commitment to creating quality game experiences that drive the popularity of the Star Wars franchise for years to come,” said John Pleasants, Co-President of Disney Interactive. “Collaborating with one of the world’s premier game developers will allow us to bring an amazing portfolio of new Star Wars titles to our fans around the world.”
“Every developer dreams of creating games for the Star Wars universe,” said EA Labels President Frank Gibeau. “Three of our top studios will fulfill that dream, crafting epic adventures for Star Wars fans. DICE and Visceral will produce new games, joining the BioWare team which continues to develop for the Star Wars franchise. The new experiences we create may borrow from films, but the games will be entirely original with all new stories and gameplay.”
Financial terms of the agreement were not disclosed.
About The Walt Disney Company
The Walt Disney Company, together with its subsidiaries and affiliates, is a leading diversified international family entertainment and media enterprise with five business segments: media networks, parks and resorts, studio entertainment, interactive media, and consumer products. Disney is a Dow 30 company with revenues of over $42 billion in its Fiscal Year 2012.
About Electronic Arts
Electronic Arts (NASDAQ:EA) is a global leader in digital interactive entertainment. The Company's game franchises are offered as both packaged goods products and online services delivered through Internet-connected consoles, personal computers, mobile phones and tablets.
EA has more than 275 million registered players and operates in 75 countries. Headquartered in Redwood City, California, EA is recognized for critically acclaimed, high-quality blockbuster franchises such as The Sims™, Madden NFL, FIFA Soccer, Need for Speed™, Battlefield™, and Mass Effect™. More information about EA is available at http://info.ea.com.
Visceral, The Sims and Need for Speed are trademarks of Electronic Arts Inc. Battlefield is a trademark of EA Digital Illusions CE AB. BioWare and Mass Effect are trademarks of EA International (Studio and Publishing) Ltd. John Madden, NFL and FIFA are the property of their respective owners and used with permission.
About Lucasfilm Ltd.
Lucasfilm Ltd., a wholly owned subsidiary of The Walt Disney Company, is a global leader in film, television and digital entertainment production. In addition to its motion-picture and television production, the company's activities include visual effects and audio post-production, cutting-edge digital animation, interactive entertainment software, and the management of the global merchandising activities for its entertainment properties including the legendary STAR WARS and INDIANA JONES franchises. Lucasfilm Ltd. is headquartered in northern California.
Lucasfilm, the Lucasfilm logo, STAR WARS and related properties are trademarks and/or copyrights, in the United States and other countries, of Lucasfilm Ltd. and/or its affiliates. TM & © 2013 Lucasfilm Ltd. All rights reserved. All other trademarks and trade names are properties of their respective owners.