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Jeremy Renner Out as Hawkeye?

Written by El Presidente on Wednesday, May 15 2013 and posted in News with Benefits

Jeremy Renner Out as Hawkeye?

A new rumor suggests that Hawkeye may be recast in the Marvel Movieverse.


Greetings, comrades! El Presidente here, reporting from the Cuban embassy in Benghazi. Why? You'll never know! Bwahahaha!

In an article that defies the laws of grammar, is reporting that Hawkeye actor Jeremy Renner may be on the outs with Marvel, and they may recast his role for future movies. Renner appeared as Hawkeye in Thor and The Avengers, but apparently he talked a bunch of crap about his part in the Avengers, saying that the mind-controlled Hawkeye that appeared for most of the movie was not the character fans wanted to see.

According to CBM and an "inside source," Marvel doesn't take kindly to actors trashing their films. The article cites the case of Hugo Weaving, who will not reprise his role as the Red Skull after speaking out against it in the press after Captain America: The First Avenger. Of course, Weaving's point was that he did not want to reprise the role, so this may be more of a case of "you can't quit because you're fired!" Then again, it may be a case of rampant speculation on the part of ComicBookMovie, as they try to take the rampant speculation market share away from those posers at Latino-Review.

Comrades, this reminds me of the time I had to get rid of Che Guevara when we disagreed on whether to start a guerilla front in Peru or Bolivia. You can't run a Marxist revolution or a Hollywood movie studio if all the players aren't on the same page. Of course, Che went on to a successful career as the singer of rap metal band Rage Against the Machine, though he was never able to get that piece of Swiss cheese unstuck from his throat, and I'm sure Jeremy Renner, if the rumors are true, will be just fine without Marvel.

Still, it's a shame to see actors replaced in an established cinematic universe. It wouldn't be the first time, however, as you may recall that Marvel replaced Terrence Howard with Don Cheadle in the role of War Machine for Iron Man 2 and nobody complained, though that is probably because American moviegoers are capitalist, racist pigs who think all black people look alike.

We may have to wait until more information becomes available about Avengers 2 before we know if this rumor is true or not, but we're sure that won't stop's Gus Sterlingham from writing five hundred articles speculating on whether Joseph Gordon-Levitt will be cast as the new Hawkeye before then.


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About the Author - El Presidente

El Presidente gave up his position as President and Prime Minister of Cuba, as well as First Secretary of Cuba's Communist Party, in 2008 in order to concentrate on his true love: Hollywood gossip reporting. Forming the rumor website Cubano Review, El Presidente built a name for himself based on over THREE DOZEN industry credited trade scoops. Unfortunately, capitalist American trade embargoes have rendered unreachable from within the United States, forcing El Presidente to syndicate his articles to The Outhouse, which flies under the radar of the American oligarchy thanks to most leaders assuming it is a scat porn site, which, to be fair, is basically true.


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