Bleeding Cool posted an article on Friday speculating on the possible effects on DC Entertainment of the imminent departure of Warner Bros. executive Jeff Robinov. Robinov is the President of Warner Bros Pictures Group, and was responsible for reorganizing DC Comics as DC Entertainment and attempting to make the beleaguered publisher behave like a big boy company (unsuccessfully). Now, it seems, his ousting from Warner Bros. is pretty much a done deal, with the company reportedly giving him the silent treatment despite the success of Man of Steel at the box office, leading many to wonder whether there could be big changes in store for the comics publisher.
But who cares about any of that? More interesting is the haunted house picture of Robinov that Rich Johnston used in his article. We swear, we got up from our computer and walked around the room, and Robinov's eyes followed us everywhere we went. We tried to shut the lid on our laptop and Robinov's painting caused our entire desk to become enveloped in an impenetrable dome of pink slime.
"On a mountain of skulls," the painting told us, "in the castle of pain, I sat on a throne of blood! What was, will be! What is, will be no more! Now is the season of evil!"
Look, we're not saying that just because that painting shows off Robinov's grim, Eastern European features in an unflattering way that Robinov himself is some kind of evil sorcerer. That would be ridiculous. He's actually an ancient and powerful vampire. With that in mind, as other websites are guessing what may happen to DC with Robinov on the way out, we'd like to offer some predictions of our own.
If nothing else, his departure from the company may mean that DC will finally be able to stop keeping human slaves chained up in the basement for use as blood sources in case a visiting Robinov feels peckish and needs to feed. Surely, DC interns will be glad to no longer be used as pawns in centuries old vampire intrigues. And hey, they can turn on the air conditioning again, now that they don't have to worry about Robinov getting sucked into the ventilation system while traveling in his mist form.
So, things will be just fine at DC Comics. Or, maybe heads will roll. That would be pretty cool too. Either way, you heard it here first, provided this is the first place you happened to read this story that Bleeding Cool reported on last week.