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Image's Godland Finale Confuses Marvel Zombies

Written by Jude Terror on Thursday, August 01 2013 and posted in News with Benefits

Image's Godland Finale Confuses Marvel Zombies

The readers are having trouble grasping the idea that a comic can actually have an ending.

Source: Press Release

Image Comics sent out a press release yesterday announcing the release of GØDLAND FINALE, a 72 page one-shot conclusion to the series that we will call, whenever we have to actually type it, Godland, because the unicode character set is for losers. Almost immediately, comic book fans who are primarily readers of Marvel Comics began to express alarm and confusion at the implication that comic books can have an actual ending.

"What?!" asked a nervous Helen Riggleman, a 35 year old fan from Texas who describes herself as a diehard Marvel Zombie, upon learning that the final issue from creators Joe Casey and Tom Scioli would provide "an epilogue story that takes the cosmic grandeur of the Eisner-nominated series to incredible new heights."

"But the ending is going to lead into the next big Godland event, right?" Riggleman asked. "It's going to change the status quo of the Godland universe, shaking it to its very foundations, which we'll be able to read about in a blockbuster super-mega-crossover event comic which will also shatter the status quo, isn't it?"

Not according to Joe Casey.

"In the FINALE, we jump one hundred years ahead into the future," said Casey in the press release, "and show a world significantly transformed by Adam Archer's 'GØD-like' actions as seen in issue #36. But, once again, humanity is teetering on another major evolutionary brink... and what ultimately occurs in the final pages is the true culmination of everything this book has been about from the very first issue."

"Yeah, sure," scoffed Curtis Rhodes, a stay-at-home dad from Irvine, CA who collects every issue of every X-Men series Marvel publishes. "But then in two months, it's going to relaunch as THE FANTABULOUS GØDLAND, or WOLVERINE AND THE GØDMEN, right?"

Nope. This is it.

"They're going to switch into an alternate universe continuity set in a post-apocalyptic future where everyone is the same but different, and several beloved characters are dead, and some heroes are villains and some villains are heroes, and everyone has spikey hair, but then in about six months we'll go back to normal then," he suggested.

No. GØDLAND FINALE will be the actual finale, and then Image isn't going to publish any more, under any name.

"Come on!" Rhodes protested. "At least, in the final issue, will we see the shoehorned introduction of a twenty year old Neil Gaiman character that serves no purpose in the GØDLAND universe except to spite the loser of a legal dispute over her rights?"

No. It's just the last issue of a comic. The creators are actually quite pleased with themselves at ending it, as evidenced by Tm Scioli, who said in the press release,  "GØDLAND #36 and the FINALE are our Hunger Dogs, our Mister Miracle #18, our Silver Star #6. I feel genuinely privileged that we were able to end the comic properly, something very few series get to do."

Despite our best efforts, we weren't able to convince these fans that comics can in fact have definitive endings. "Next thing you'll tell me that an ongoing series doesn't need to be rebooted every three years. Or that a comic inside a polybag and outside a polybag contain the same number of particles or something."

Well, structurally, there is no difference.

"The GØDLAND FINALE will be in stores on November 27 and can be pre-ordered in the September issue of Previews," said the press release helpfully.


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About the Author - Jude Terror

Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably. A certified trash eater ruining the pristine field of comics journalism with his sarcasm and goofiness, Jude Terror is secretly friendly and congenial, so if you've got a complaint, why not just bring it up to him instead of subtweeting like a jackass, jackass? You can find him on Twitter or try your luck with an email, but keep in mind that he is notoriously unreliable and may not get back to you right away. Unless you want to send him free stuff, in which case he'll get back to you immediately.

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