Written by Jude Terror
on Monday, August 12 2013 and posted in News with Benefits
Instead of a talking tree, the character will be a bald, tattooed, street racing bandit.
Big news coming out of D23. Everyone has been speculating on what part superstar actor Vin Diesel would play in the Marvel Movieverse, and it looks like we may finally have an answer. Sources are saying Diesel will be voicing Groot in Guardians of the Galaxy. This is still in the rumor stage, but hey, it's a weekend, and everyone knows journalistic standards are more lax on Saturdays and Sundays.
"Groot is an anthropomorphic tree, so Vin Deisel's wooden acting seems perfect for the role," explained Marvel Studios head Kevin Feige.
In related news, former pro-wrestler and director James Gunn announced that the character Groot would recieve a massive retooling for the film.
"Instead of a talking tree, Groot will be a rugged, muscular ex-con with a penchant for driving fast cars and pulling off major heists," Gunn explained. "The Guardians will find themselves needing to work with Groot despite his unsavory reputation, and Groot will reluctantly be forced to work with them. Despite his roguish attitude, the bald-headed miscreant - oh yeah, he's not gonna be a tree anymore - will prove to have a sort of thief's honor and end up saving the day."
Amongst other changes, the character's position of royal birth and possible status as last living member of his race will be replaced by "an affinity for nipple tattoos."
"He's still only going to ever say 'I am Groot' though," the director added. "We don't want to press Vin's acting skills to far."
Guardians of the Galaxy will be in theaters in 2014.
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About the Author - Jude Terror
Jude Terror is the Webmaster Supreme of The Outhouse and a sarcastic ace reporter dedicated to delivering irreverent comics and entertainment news to The Outhouse's dozens of loyal readers. Driven by a quest for vengeance, Jude Terror taught himself to program and joined The Outhouse. He instantly began working toward his goal of forcing the internet comics community to take itself less seriously and failing miserably. A certified trash eater ruining the pristine field of comics journalism with his sarcasm and goofiness, Jude Terror is secretly friendly and congenial, so if you've got a complaint, why not just bring it up to him instead of subtweeting like a jackass, jackass? You can find him on Twitter or try your luck with an email, but keep in mind that he is notoriously unreliable and may not get back to you right away. Unless you want to send him free stuff, in which case he'll get back to you immediately.
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